An Un-Earthly Poll: How Well Would YOU Survive a Zombie Apocalypse? (All Mortals Are Welcome to Answer!)
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LOL! That is so true! How would I survive the zombie apocalypse? Ya gotta keep rolling with the new info.
If we have the slow dumb zombies only infecting with bites, you could probably shelter in place. Wouldn't last long. Probably only in a large city would things possibly get out of hand.
Some films/TV shows had a "fun" idea about a mass zombie wave of thousands. If one's coming, you'd want to leave. Bring Susanna some champagne. Which is actually what you should do when a tornado is coming. It always surprised me when I'd see folks park their car under a bridge when they can just drive away. If you get caught by the hoard, the attic stuffed with supplies would work.
If you have to move around through the zombie landscape, I'd take a sword, rapier, ya know, if you have one. Short spear, at the local museum. An Uzi would be nice, light ammo, quick load. Riffle with a bayonet would be handy. Practically, 9mm pistol, holster, extra clips with ammo belt, with a baseball bat, fireplace poker, crowbar or hammer. Lots of popcorn.
If we have the slow dumb zombies only infecting with bites, you could probably shelter in place. Wouldn't last long. Probably only in a large city would things possibly get out of hand.
Some films/TV shows had a "fun" idea about a mass zombie wave of thousands. If one's coming, you'd want to leave. Bring Susanna some champagne. Which is actually what you should do when a tornado is coming. It always surprised me when I'd see folks park their car under a bridge when they can just drive away.
If you get caught by the hoard, the attic stuffed with supplies would work.If you have to move around through the zombie landscape, I'd take a sword, rapier, ya know, if you have one.
Short spear, at the local museum. An Uzi would be nice, light ammo, quick load. Riffle with a bayonet would be handy. Practically, 9mm pistol, holster, extra clips with ammo belt, with a baseball bat, fireplace poker, crowbar or hammer. Lots of popcorn. -
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LOL! That is so true! How would I survive the zombie apocalypse? Ya gotta keep rolling with the new info.
If we have the slow dumb zombies only infecting with bites, you could probably shelter in place. Wouldn't last long. Probably only in a large city would things possibly get out of hand.
Some films/TV shows had a "fun" idea about a mass zombie wave of thousands. If one's coming, you'd want to leave. Bring Susanna some champagne. Which is actually what you should do when a tornado is coming. It always surprised me when I'd see folks park their car under a bridge when they can just drive away. If you get caught by the hoard, the attic stuffed with supplies would work.
If you have to move around through the zombie landscape, I'd take a sword, rapier, ya know, if you have one. Short spear, at the local museum. An Uzi would be nice, light ammo, quick load. Riffle with a bayonet would be handy. Practically, 9mm pistol, holster, extra clips with ammo belt, with a baseball bat, fireplace poker, crowbar or hammer. Lots of popcorn.
If we have the slow dumb zombies only infecting with bites, you could probably shelter in place. Wouldn't last long. Probably only in a large city would things possibly get out of hand.
Some films/TV shows had a "fun" idea about a mass zombie wave of thousands. If one's coming, you'd want to leave. Bring Susanna some champagne. Which is actually what you should do when a tornado is coming. It always surprised me when I'd see folks park their car under a bridge when they can just drive away.
If you get caught by the hoard, the attic stuffed with supplies would work.If you have to move around through the zombie landscape, I'd take a sword, rapier, ya know, if you have one.
Short spear, at the local museum. An Uzi would be nice, light ammo, quick load. Riffle with a bayonet would be handy. Practically, 9mm pistol, holster, extra clips with ammo belt, with a baseball bat, fireplace poker, crowbar or hammer. Lots of popcorn.
I love it when people give super detailed answers to a question like this.
It means:
1. Maybe they've watched too many zombie movies -- especially when they know the differences between the apparent "varieties" of zombies.
2. They've actually put a lot of thought into how they would deal with each type.
3. They're a heck of a lot more prepared than I am -- and I sure hope they live near by if a real zombie apocalypse happens!
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I once had a dream about being in a house with zombies, and following in the style of Bugs Bunny, I was serving them dinner. Shaggy was among the seated at the dining table looking at me expectantly (but Scooby was conspicuously missing). So, I don't know if that falls under the "I have (or would it be I had) a lot of expendable friends and neighbors...but I find it eerily coincidental that fell under the number 'ate.' But I do wonder if I was only serving them some Scooby snacks.
But to be honest, if Scooby were to accidentally be served to zombies... I can't say I'd feel all that bad.
I loved watching Scooby Doo after school every day throughout my childhood, but I found Scooby himself to be annoying. My favorite characters were always Shaggy, Daphne, and the Mystery Machine itself (I always liked its groovy colors, and the fact that 5 people could somehow comfortably live out of a van.) In my eyes, Mystery Inc. was the original instigators of "van life."
But to hear about Scooby accidentally going missing... Well, just show me more about how to fit 5 people's luggage and living necessities all inside that van, and I wouldn't have missed Scooby one bit.
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It's funny because in another thread, @Mem went into great detail about how my favorite characters from Winnie the Pooh could be basted, boiled, baked, and slow-cooked...
But to be honest, if Scooby were to accidentally be served to zombies... I can't say I'd feel all that bad.
I loved watching Scooby Doo after school every day throughout my childhood, but I found Scooby himself to be annoying. My favorite characters were always Shaggy, Daphne, and the Mystery Machine itself (I always liked its groovy colors, and the fact that 5 people could somehow comfortably live out of a van.) In my eyes, Mystery Inc. was the original instigators of "van life."
But to hear about Scooby accidentally going missing... Well, just show me more about how to fit 5 people's luggage and living necessities all inside that van, and I wouldn't have missed Scooby one bit.
But to be honest, if Scooby were to accidentally be served to zombies... I can't say I'd feel all that bad.
I loved watching Scooby Doo after school every day throughout my childhood, but I found Scooby himself to be annoying. My favorite characters were always Shaggy, Daphne, and the Mystery Machine itself (I always liked its groovy colors, and the fact that 5 people could somehow comfortably live out of a van.) In my eyes, Mystery Inc. was the original instigators of "van life."
But to hear about Scooby accidentally going missing... Well, just show me more about how to fit 5 people's luggage and living necessities all inside that van, and I wouldn't have missed Scooby one bit.
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Incidentally, I downloaded a popular mobile game about zombies, and I love it. Not because of the zombies, but because it is a microcosm of real life. The game rules are sparse, therefore people make their own rules. Which works EXTREMELY WELL most of the time. The territory I am in developed a non-aggression pact. The game gives me the power to attack my neighbors, but the NAP means I will get retaliated on until there is nothing left. And there are PAGES of Discord posts about in-game politics (You can emigrate between territories, and the governor of a territory has some control over how many immigration applications they will accept, among a few other political aspects to the game.) People discuss the pros and cons of immigration and who should be allowed to join our little NATO until the cows come home. You could probably easily write a PhD dissertation on the invented politics of the imaginary states within a mobile game. I find it intriguing. The freedom to mess around and find out always reminds me of Apostle Paul's quote about how "All things are lawful, but not all things are expedient".
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USER=306838]@Sculpt[/USER]'s keen (but unverified)
I realize a boat with a motor (better yet, a yacht) would be much nicer.
(I also realize I keep mentioning things like bunkers and yachts -- what can I say. I'm happy with my current peasant life, but is it so wrong to aspire to survive a zombie apocalypse in style?!)
I realize a boat with a motor (better yet, a yacht) would be much nicer.
(I also realize I keep mentioning things like bunkers and yachts -- what can I say. I'm happy with my current peasant life, but is it so wrong to aspire to survive a zombie apocalypse in style?!)
You reminded me of the yacht scenario. Here's a few actors doing a promo for it.
Reminds me of another good question from a Banterist article - Why are zombie heads so brittle?
BANTERIST ARTICLE:
Why Are These Zombies So Brittle?
Posted on October 28, 2015 by Brian Sack (real name, I swear)
Hey Gang,
I know it’s been a crazy few months with all the running for our lives and the collapse of society and all that. You’re family to me and I love you, but something’s been nagging at me and I just need to put it out there.
Why are these zombies so brittle?
Anybody notice? You can just prance up and jab a pen knife into their craniums as though they were over-ripe melons.
That’s weird right?
I ask because in the glorious pre-zombie years we all got punched or whacked or fell off our bikes. Did our foreheads shatter like florescent bulbs? No they didn’t. They were resilient. You couldn’t just push objects into our heads. That’s why we’re alive today.
Now suddenly every zombie skull has the structural integrity of a Frito.
What gives?
I’m not complaining, mind you. It’s a good thing! The fact that a petite gal like Isabella can lobotomize a walker with plastic salad tongs — that’s definitely gotten us out of a few pickles!
But why? Why are these zombies so brittle?
And before you shrug it off as a zombie thing: Remember Bruce, the quiet guy who was with us for a couple weeks? He head-butted that renegade biker and knocked him out cold! Then he gets bitten, turns into a zombie and Tommy has to dispatch him with a can opener to the temple. One minute he’s head-butting bikers, seconds later the same skull is a cheap piñata.
That’s just messed up.
So what is it? You die and get osteoporosis? That’s almost as weird as the zombie plague itself. It doesn’t make sense to me. It’s driving me nuts.
Let’s not get fixated on it because we have bigger fish to fry, but it’s something to think about next time you’re gingerly thrusting a nail file through back of someone’s head.
Your Comrade-in-Arms,
Kevin
TRACKBACK:
https://www.banterist.com/why-are-these-zombies-so-brittle/
BANTERIST ARTICLE:
Why Are These Zombies So Brittle?
Posted on October 28, 2015 by Brian Sack (real name, I swear)
Hey Gang,
I know it’s been a crazy few months with all the running for our lives and the collapse of society and all that. You’re family to me and I love you, but something’s been nagging at me and I just need to put it out there.
Why are these zombies so brittle?
Anybody notice? You can just prance up and jab a pen knife into their craniums as though they were over-ripe melons.
That’s weird right?
I ask because in the glorious pre-zombie years we all got punched or whacked or fell off our bikes. Did our foreheads shatter like florescent bulbs? No they didn’t. They were resilient. You couldn’t just push objects into our heads. That’s why we’re alive today.
Now suddenly every zombie skull has the structural integrity of a Frito.
What gives?
I’m not complaining, mind you. It’s a good thing! The fact that a petite gal like Isabella can lobotomize a walker with plastic salad tongs — that’s definitely gotten us out of a few pickles!
But why? Why are these zombies so brittle?
And before you shrug it off as a zombie thing: Remember Bruce, the quiet guy who was with us for a couple weeks? He head-butted that renegade biker and knocked him out cold! Then he gets bitten, turns into a zombie and Tommy has to dispatch him with a can opener to the temple. One minute he’s head-butting bikers, seconds later the same skull is a cheap piñata.
That’s just messed up.
So what is it? You die and get osteoporosis? That’s almost as weird as the zombie plague itself. It doesn’t make sense to me. It’s driving me nuts.
Let’s not get fixated on it because we have bigger fish to fry, but it’s something to think about next time you’re gingerly thrusting a nail file through back of someone’s head.
Your Comrade-in-Arms,
Kevin
TRACKBACK:
https://www.banterist.com/why-are-these-zombies-so-brittle/
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