Hey Everyone,
One of the criticisms I've heard towards singles is that we are selfish -- because it's assumed that all we have to think about it ourselves.
While this can definitely be true (but who doesn't have selfish moments in life?,) I'm at an age where almost every person I know who is single is also actively caring for (or at least regularly checking on) someone else.
In my young adulthood, my family moved away from my hometown, mostly for job opportunities. Back then we were all pretty much independent, so there wasn't much reason to worry, and as the years rolled by, I started to hear the siren call of a new life far, far away. But because I still had grandparents in the area, I felt compelled to stay -- and was glad to still be there when I was needed.
Years later, my parents were living across the country and my Mom had an unexpected medical emergency. At first things weren't looking good. I was at work, catching up with my Dad's messages as I contemplated hopping on a plane as soon as I could, but it would still take a full day of connecting flights to get to them. And then in the last message, when my Dad's voice cracked and he broke down crying on the phone to where he couldn't finish speaking, I told God, "I can't take this, God. This can never happen again."
I couldn't stand the thought of my Dad sitting in a cold hospital waiting room all by himself, huddled up all alone -- and scared.
Thus began a cross-country adventures that has landed me in several areas, but never more than 20 minutes away from my parents. And when they called today with a minor but unforeseen emergency, I realized that things had shifted yet again. We now live close to other family, but they're currently on vacation -- and I realized that from now on, at least one of us has to be in this area at all times.
I think about these things in contrast to the younger singles (and myself back in the day) who are eagerly looking for someone to marry, and how they probably had a lot more freedom in where they can go, work, and build a life.
It made me think of the verses in which Jesus told Peter that when he was young, he could go where he wanted... But how that would change as he grew older, and others would lead him where he did not want to go (for a much more solemn reason.)
As for me, my life is closely tied to, and currently led by my parents. Aside from God, as an adopted child, I have an especially strong sense of owing them everything, and it is important to me to show them as much love as they have always shown me. My life is most definitely no longer my own. Where I go, where I stay, and how far I am away (if at all,) will depend on what they need.
What about you?
* Aside from your new life in Christ (realizing your life is His,) what are the other times when you realized your life was no longer your own?
* Married friends are welcome to answer as well. How did it feel to know your life was no longer yours, but also someone else's?
* For those who have several people their lives are tied to (spouse, multiple children, parents, etc.) -- how do you keep a piece, just for yourself? Or do you find that it isn't necessary?
* How do you cope when you feel like everyone else has a say in your life -- except for you?
My married friends write to me about how hard it is to try to balance their own family life with the needs of 2 sets of parents (especially with dementia...) And I thank God that for now, I'm glad I only have to keep track of one. (I like to tell my parents that keeping them out of trouble is a full-time job.)
Guess where I learned it from if you've ever wondered!
I know that if I met someone, my parents would be very welcoming and understanding -- but I know that I would have to stay close to where they are, because I couldn't handle another emergency phone call knowing one or both of them was in a terrible situation -- and across teh country, all alone.
Whose life is yours tied to?
One of the criticisms I've heard towards singles is that we are selfish -- because it's assumed that all we have to think about it ourselves.
While this can definitely be true (but who doesn't have selfish moments in life?,) I'm at an age where almost every person I know who is single is also actively caring for (or at least regularly checking on) someone else.
In my young adulthood, my family moved away from my hometown, mostly for job opportunities. Back then we were all pretty much independent, so there wasn't much reason to worry, and as the years rolled by, I started to hear the siren call of a new life far, far away. But because I still had grandparents in the area, I felt compelled to stay -- and was glad to still be there when I was needed.
Years later, my parents were living across the country and my Mom had an unexpected medical emergency. At first things weren't looking good. I was at work, catching up with my Dad's messages as I contemplated hopping on a plane as soon as I could, but it would still take a full day of connecting flights to get to them. And then in the last message, when my Dad's voice cracked and he broke down crying on the phone to where he couldn't finish speaking, I told God, "I can't take this, God. This can never happen again."
I couldn't stand the thought of my Dad sitting in a cold hospital waiting room all by himself, huddled up all alone -- and scared.
Thus began a cross-country adventures that has landed me in several areas, but never more than 20 minutes away from my parents. And when they called today with a minor but unforeseen emergency, I realized that things had shifted yet again. We now live close to other family, but they're currently on vacation -- and I realized that from now on, at least one of us has to be in this area at all times.
I think about these things in contrast to the younger singles (and myself back in the day) who are eagerly looking for someone to marry, and how they probably had a lot more freedom in where they can go, work, and build a life.
It made me think of the verses in which Jesus told Peter that when he was young, he could go where he wanted... But how that would change as he grew older, and others would lead him where he did not want to go (for a much more solemn reason.)
As for me, my life is closely tied to, and currently led by my parents. Aside from God, as an adopted child, I have an especially strong sense of owing them everything, and it is important to me to show them as much love as they have always shown me. My life is most definitely no longer my own. Where I go, where I stay, and how far I am away (if at all,) will depend on what they need.
What about you?
* Aside from your new life in Christ (realizing your life is His,) what are the other times when you realized your life was no longer your own?
* Married friends are welcome to answer as well. How did it feel to know your life was no longer yours, but also someone else's?
* For those who have several people their lives are tied to (spouse, multiple children, parents, etc.) -- how do you keep a piece, just for yourself? Or do you find that it isn't necessary?
* How do you cope when you feel like everyone else has a say in your life -- except for you?
My married friends write to me about how hard it is to try to balance their own family life with the needs of 2 sets of parents (especially with dementia...) And I thank God that for now, I'm glad I only have to keep track of one. (I like to tell my parents that keeping them out of trouble is a full-time job.)
Guess where I learned it from if you've ever wondered! I know that if I met someone, my parents would be very welcoming and understanding -- but I know that I would have to stay close to where they are, because I couldn't handle another emergency phone call knowing one or both of them was in a terrible situation -- and across teh country, all alone.
Whose life is yours tied to?
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