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What's After "Hello?"
- Thread starter SteveEpperson
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You always have a word of encouragement... I love that!!! .
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Martyrdom? I was about to tell you how much I appreciated your efforts, but after this ignorant response -- ignorant because you do not know the amount of ghosting and flat-out rejections I've had over the past 13+ years, and why else it is I'm still single -- I think it's time we cut this conversation off right here.
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I don't get it, sorry. When I say hello to a woman I've never met, they usually say hello back. Are people really that mean where you are from????
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Maybe I'm missing something here, but I cannot recall when a woman EVER said goodbye right after I said hello to her. I think that this is something that many of you are conjuring up in your mind as an excuse not to say hello to a stranger. But you will never know unless you open your mouth and say hello.
I drove for over 12 hours today and still managed to say hello to almost half a dozen women. They all said hello back. While I didn't have time to converse with any of them, it made my day, and possibly brightened theirs a bit.
I drove for over 12 hours today and still managed to say hello to almost half a dozen women. They all said hello back. While I didn't have time to converse with any of them, it made my day, and possibly brightened theirs a bit.
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SteveEpperson said:
In fact, I often ask about what a woman's most romantic date was or what her very first kiss was like.
I totally get your reaction here. You, like most other men, have been told never to have such an intimate conversation with a woman you just met. You may get slapped across the face.
I should have prefaced my statement by saying this is what I used to do--before giving my life to Christ-- to accelerate the romance. Still, if you ask a romantic question in a God-honoring way, it can bring you closer together. Again, you must have self-control and show restraint.
But let's face it, if you want her to marry you, at some point, she will have to view you as a future sexual partner. There's no way around that. So, by the time you get engaged to be married, you are so on fire for each other that only the supernatural power of the Holy Spirit can restrain you.
In fact, I often ask about what a woman's most romantic date was or what her very first kiss was like.
I totally get your reaction here. You, like most other men, have been told never to have such an intimate conversation with a woman you just met. You may get slapped across the face.I should have prefaced my statement by saying this is what I used to do--before giving my life to Christ-- to accelerate the romance. Still, if you ask a romantic question in a God-honoring way, it can bring you closer together. Again, you must have self-control and show restraint.
But let's face it, if you want her to marry you, at some point, she will have to view you as a future sexual partner. There's no way around that. So, by the time you get engaged to be married, you are so on fire for each other that only the supernatural power of the Holy Spirit can restrain you.
IF you want her to marry you, it's not likely to be a decision you've made at your first conversation ever. had a young man said something like that to me when we'd just met, i'd have considered it impertinent, to say the very least.
if you'll take a piece of advice from an old woman, try to stop thinking of the ladies as a monolithic group. (all girls like kittens. right?)
we're not, you know. we're individuals with different likes and dislikes, just as men are.
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All girls are like cacti. Some are harmless, a few are even beneficial, but a lot of them will stab you if you get close.
Actually the cats I have known have all been very individual. Kittens are kittens - you got ten kittens, you got ten kittens - but you got ten adult cats, you have NO idea what you got until you learn each cat's personality.
Actually the cats I have known have all been very individual. Kittens are kittens - you got ten kittens, you got ten kittens - but you got ten adult cats, you have NO idea what you got until you learn each cat's personality.
Maybe I'm missing something here, but I cannot recall when a woman EVER said goodbye right after I said hello to her. I think that this is something that many of you are conjuring up in your mind as an excuse not to say hello to a stranger. But you will never know unless you open your mouth and say hello.
Speaking of allergies, I'm so glad summer's here! Beautiful things (like spring, women, etc.) often bring challenges with the charm (such as pollen, not automatically understanding them, the chance that they'll misunderstand what you say, etc.).
I'm glad my male friends have gotten to know me (mostly by paying attention to my reactions to things, rather than treating me like a replica of others), and, if an algorithm of how to respond to me is used, it is a custom one tailored specifically to me, that takes into account what things will probably make me smile or freak me out.
I'm glad my male friends have gotten to know me (mostly by paying attention to my reactions to things, rather than treating me like a replica of others), and, if an algorithm of how to respond to me is used, it is a custom one tailored specifically to me, that takes into account what things will probably make me smile or freak me out.
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I actually got to thinking about how I would react if a guy asked me what my first kiss was like "to bring out my romantic side" -- as is being advised in this thread.
My first kiss was actually snuck on the playground with my grade school boyfriend (obviously, we never spent any time with each other outside of school or school events.)
My first "real" kiss was in high school with my first "real" boyfriend -- and then I started thinking about how that relationship went down in flames due to a lot of external interference.
I wasn't left feeling romantic.
Instead, I felt a mixture of nostalgia, sadness, anger and regret (that I didn't stand up for myself more,) and gratitude that God got me out of that situation (though I couldn't see it as that at the time.)
So for anyone who is actually taking notes on the advice being given in threads like this, prepare for it to work out a whole lot differently in real life.
And what if the person's first kiss was actually from someone who abused them?
Yeah.
I think this is just part of what makes me uneasy with such generic advice. These days especially, people have extremely complicated histories and asking them personal information -- especially when you don't know them very well -- is going to open an entire of barrel of worms you might not have been prepared to take on just quite yet.
My first kiss was actually snuck on the playground with my grade school boyfriend (obviously, we never spent any time with each other outside of school or school events.)
My first "real" kiss was in high school with my first "real" boyfriend -- and then I started thinking about how that relationship went down in flames due to a lot of external interference.
I wasn't left feeling romantic.
Instead, I felt a mixture of nostalgia, sadness, anger and regret (that I didn't stand up for myself more,) and gratitude that God got me out of that situation (though I couldn't see it as that at the time.)
So for anyone who is actually taking notes on the advice being given in threads like this, prepare for it to work out a whole lot differently in real life.
And what if the person's first kiss was actually from someone who abused them?
Yeah.
I think this is just part of what makes me uneasy with such generic advice. These days especially, people have extremely complicated histories and asking them personal information -- especially when you don't know them very well -- is going to open an entire of barrel of worms you might not have been prepared to take on just quite yet.
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I'm sitting here thinking about the aftermath of being asked to think about my first kiss.
Now maybe I'm just an overthinker (I've been told that a lot in my life, lol,) but I'm left thinking about that whole situation and that entire period in my life. He was a wonderful guy, but... And then I start thinking about all the circumstances out of our control (family drama, etc.) that led to our ruin, and all the things we were going through at that time...
In other words...
Asking someone about their first kiss right off the bat might get them thinking about someone else -- rather than you.
Now maybe I'm just an overthinker (I've been told that a lot in my life, lol,) but I'm left thinking about that whole situation and that entire period in my life. He was a wonderful guy, but... And then I start thinking about all the circumstances out of our control (family drama, etc.) that led to our ruin, and all the things we were going through at that time...
In other words...
Asking someone about their first kiss right off the bat might get them thinking about someone else -- rather than you.
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I am not sure who you are directing this to. Also, I don't understand your comment here. Can you take a moment to clarify? Thx.
But, this also highlights the problem that happens when you put half of your audience on your Ignore List.
The person ignoring everyone is completely unaware of crucial parts of the conversation, then responds without having a clue as to what's going on -- making their posts, even if they are the author of the thread, sound glaringly out of place.
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On the upside, we could have an entirely different conversation in this thread and he wouldn't even know, much less be bothered by it.
How about a quick poll from your friends on this question? Not their answers to the question, but how they feel about somebody asking them such a question the first time they meet someone.
BB seems like the most worldly wise of the bunch. What would she think if somebody asked her such a question the first time they met?
What is Hoot's philosophical take on the matter?
What about the polite but efficient Holla? What would she think about it?
Sammy seems to be the kind of guy who would try way too hard to please the ladies. I don't know why, but he just looks like a really outgoing guy that makes girls roll their eyes. What would he think about such a question?
I leave out Winston and Rosie because they are too young to know about these things. You can ask Loqui if you want, but he will probably just yawn and change the subject.
How about a quick poll from your friends on this question? Not their answers to the question, but how they feel about somebody asking them such a question the first time they meet someone.
BB seems like the most worldly wise of the bunch. What would she think if somebody asked her such a question the first time they met?
What is Hoot's philosophical take on the matter?
What about the polite but efficient Holla? What would she think about it?
Sammy seems to be the kind of guy who would try way too hard to please the ladies. I don't know why, but he just looks like a really outgoing guy that makes girls roll their eyes. What would he think about such a question?
I leave out Winston and Rosie because they are too young to know about these things. You can ask Loqui if you want, but he will probably just yawn and change the subject.
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This brings up a fantastic point. If a woman for any reason doesn't respond well to you, NEVER take it personally. As stated above, all women are individuals with different tastes and likes. Therefore, if a woman rejects you, it's best to quickly move on to one who will be open and receptive to you.
I've seen too many men get hung up on one woman-- even for years-- who rejects him time after time after time. Instead, it's best to quickly forget about her and move on to a woman who will appreciate you. After all, you're a man, not a doormat.
Think of it this way. Around six billion people inhabit our planet, and over half are female. Surely you can find one woman out of three billion who will appreciate you.
I've seen too many men get hung up on one woman-- even for years-- who rejects him time after time after time. Instead, it's best to quickly forget about her and move on to a woman who will appreciate you. After all, you're a man, not a doormat.
Think of it this way. Around six billion people inhabit our planet, and over half are female. Surely you can find one woman out of three billion who will appreciate you.