I met my first husband through friends...at a bar...I was 18...I wanted to be a wife to the first person who asked me and a mother. I never dated before...he was the first to ask. I thought a college man would be responsible. I thought many things about what I thought he must be like. I thought I knew him before I knew him and if I didn't I could change him. Ha! Ha!
We made three kids and 10 1/2 years of a miserable marriage together. My drinking, his gambling, and debt to the hilt didn't help. But what beautiful kids! All successful and two Christians, one I pray still for, yet a successful man. I wish I could turn back time but then I wouldn't have those three.
Now I am remarried to a wonderful Christian man of 18 very happy years together. We met through friends...at a bar...but because we were both there for a fundraiser for a mutual friend who had cancer. I wasn't drunk and neither was he. My first impression of him was his kind eyes and clean appearance.
He has three wonderful kids too. We share 12 grandkids. God hand-picked him for me because I promised God the "next one" was on him. I would date no one else unless God did the picking! He has more experience being a matchmaker after all.
I can tell you, marry a Christian man or woman in the truest sense of the word. Not just a churchgoer, not just one who knows scripture, not someone who has a good career, beautiful clothes, and great physical appearance to make you think he or she must be godly to have such things in order. No! Marry one who walks the talk. Marry one who is genuinely gracious, and kind and has the fruit of the Spirit, or at least some of it as we are all continuing to grow and mature if we are in Christ Jesus. Do they give God the glory, speak openly of him and about him?
I was so uncomfortable when I first met my second husband. He was unlike any I had ever met. It bugged me he was so kind, loving, and patient with me. That is why I made myself give him a chance. HE WAS DIFFERENT than anyone I had ever met before. I dated jerks unknowingly until too late. I had given up too much for them. A Christian will always be different than what the world can offer. See the difference. If you don't know what that should be, read the book of James.