Is anyone else struggling being a true christian?
I was always happy to go to church but after attending carnival everthing changed now when i go to church i get irritated and every time i hear the word of God i feel like i want to faint i get these strong headaches and then i get dizzy.
I'd suggest don't join any Christian forums. When you are in a weakened state as you describe the diverse personalities you'll find there will only contribute to the headache.
Not everyone on a forum is an actual Christian.
Also, don't worry about how to be Christian. Relax. Pray, walk in nature, meditate. And listen to your intuition. Which for the Christian is that voice of Holy Spirit.
And you can always journal. Write to Jesus, God, your inner thoughts. Let it all out. God is always listening.
Right now you may be in the midst of a test. Life is a confluence of the good and the evil. The path you choose will be best on all sides by the adversary of God.
Stay strong. You've got Jesus.
Which means, you've no need to fear. You are eternally in his saving grace. Now you just have to let go and trust that.
God Bless.