Coming out as Christian to friends (Seeking advice)

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
Feb 1, 2023
82
51
18
#1
In need of some advice (dos and dont's) about coming out as Christian to my friends who are pretty much against any kind of Religion. It's not so much about them knowing as it as about me not having to hide it anymore. I'm afraid of how they might react, i have always been vocal about my opinions and beliefs but i can't understand why this is such a big issue now. All advice is welcome.
 

JohnDB

Well-known member
Jan 16, 2021
6,279
2,557
113
#2
In need of some advice (dos and dont's) about coming out as Christian to my friends who are pretty much against any kind of Religion. It's not so much about them knowing as it as about me not having to hide it anymore. I'm afraid of how they might react, i have always been vocal about my opinions and beliefs but i can't understand why this is such a big issue now. All advice is welcome.
I once hid my faith....
Then I completely stopped. I didn't preach at my friends...ever! But if they asked a question in sincerity I answered them with THEIR benefit in mind.

And they come along...like the guy with tons of porn on his phone and the latest funny porn picture came to me one day and asked what to do about his daughter who got the reputation of being an oral sex queen. Or the guy who wrecked his racing car and then lost a kitten that hung out in his gear head shop....a grown man crying like a little school girl. (That wasn't pretty) Then there's the party guy who took 8 years to convert...i never preached at him either....we were friends and I liked working with him. I never once told him what he wanted to hear but what he needed to hear. Doesn't mean he didn't get angry or fuss at me unreservedly. But one day he told me he was going to be a Christian and clean up his act...and he did.
Then there's the thug....one day they gave me a bona fide street thug to work with. The only reason why he had a legitimate job was because the judge made him...it was a condition of parole. He cleaned up his act too....decided to be a real father to his kids. And he also decided to stop doing drugs...selling or using.
Then there's the Cajun guy who lost his parents and was drowning in alcohol....cleaned up his stuff too. Then there's.....

I never once preached at anybody. I didn't need to. They knew exactly who I was and how I conducted myself. Lots of guys scoffed...don't matter. They knew I was a Christian...the community also knew that I was very generous and kind. I wasn't a doormat by any stretch of the imagination (kinda a primadonna) but I was also very talented to back up my attitude.

This isn't anything other than what it is....you have faith. So don't do things that do not agree with your faith. Go to church or small group Bible studies....get some church friends to do stuff with.

Be who God made you to be...that's all you really got to do.
 

Amary77

New member
Feb 8, 2023
4
4
3
#3
Since you said that these are your friends, that must mean that they like you as a person. If you were to tell them that you’re Christian, they may not like that part of you but do you think that they might still continue to be your friend for the person that you are? Do you think it would bother you a lot if they accepted all the other parts of you except for your faith? I guess it also depends on whether you may be the type of person who really strongly encourages people to follow God even though they may be very resistant to it. I would hope that your friends would be okay with the fact that you’re a Christian so long as you don’t force them to believe in it
 
Feb 1, 2023
82
51
18
#4
I once hid my faith....
Then I completely stopped. I didn't preach at my friends...ever! But if they asked a question in sincerity I answered them with THEIR benefit in mind.

And they come along...like the guy with tons of porn on his phone and the latest funny porn picture came to me one day and asked what to do about his daughter who got the reputation of being an oral sex queen. Or the guy who wrecked his racing car and then lost a kitten that hung out in his gear head shop....a grown man crying like a little school girl. (That wasn't pretty) Then there's the party guy who took 8 years to convert...i never preached at him either....we were friends and I liked working with him. I never once told him what he wanted to hear but what he needed to hear. Doesn't mean he didn't get angry or fuss at me unreservedly. But one day he told me he was going to be a Christian and clean up his act...and he did.
Then there's the thug....one day they gave me a bona fide street thug to work with. The only reason why he had a legitimate job was because the judge made him...it was a condition of parole. He cleaned up his act too....decided to be a real father to his kids. And he also decided to stop doing drugs...selling or using.
Then there's the Cajun guy who lost his parents and was drowning in alcohol....cleaned up his stuff too. Then there's.....

I never once preached at anybody. I didn't need to. They knew exactly who I was and how I conducted myself. Lots of guys scoffed...don't matter. They knew I was a Christian...the community also knew that I was very generous and kind. I wasn't a doormat by any stretch of the imagination (kinda a primadonna) but I was also very talented to back up my attitude.

This isn't anything other than what it is....you have faith. So don't do things that do not agree with your faith. Go to church or small group Bible studies....get some church friends to do stuff with.

Be who God made you to be...that's all you really got to do.
Ok after reading your reply i have came to the conclusion that maybe im overthinking this whole thing and had a wrong idea of how this whole thing has to play out.
 

HealthAndHappiness

Well-known member
Jul 7, 2022
10,602
4,522
113
Almost Heaven West Virginia
#5
Just keep in mind that once you do this,
you are the in God's family and on the winning team. Then keep reminding yourself that your friendship to Christ is most important. You are there to not let them influence you to sin, but to introduce them to your new friend. I can help you with that anytime. Just ask.
 
Feb 4, 2023
38
19
8
#6
In need of some advice (dos and dont's) about coming out as Christian to my friends who are pretty much against any kind of Religion. It's not so much about them knowing as it as about me not having to hide it anymore. I'm afraid of how they might react, i have always been vocal about my opinions and beliefs but i can't understand why this is such a big issue now. All advice is welcome.
Hello brother! It's actually not so much about sharing the gospel but living it by example that you really are preaching. Paul said that we are the epistle being read by people. Let your light shine, and that's not by words. Also, we are warned that we should not be unequally yoked with unbelievers, meaning do not do as they do. Jesus is a friend of sinners but he did not do as they did.
 
Feb 1, 2023
82
51
18
#7
Just keep in mind that once you do this,
you are the in God's family and on the winning team. Then keep reminding yourself that your friendship to Christ is most important. You are there to not let them influence you to sin, but to introduce them to your new friend. I can help you with that anytime. Just ask.
I had
Hello brother! It's actually not so much about sharing the gospel but living it by example that you really are preaching. Paul said that we are the epistle being read by people. Let your light shine, and that's not by words. Also, we are warned that we should not be unequally yoked with unbelievers, meaning do not do as they do. Jesus is a friend of sinners but he did not do as they did.
I had the wrong idea all along. Thank you for clearing things up this is wonderful news. Are you the same Sheariah that i met in the CC app?
 
Feb 1, 2023
82
51
18
#9
That's great Denis!
Are you 100% sure that if you died after committing a big sin that you would go to heaven?
Sorry the reply got messed up. I am still unsure but i am on the right way to being saved. It may sound weird when i say it like this but im 100%sure the holly spirit is working in me.
 
Feb 4, 2023
38
19
8
#10
I had

I had the wrong idea all along. Thank you for clearing things up this is wonderful news. Are you the same Sheariah that i met in the CC app?
No problem brother! You can find it in the bible. I thought also before that I need to just preach but I saw myself as a hypocrite, but you will know more overtime as you draw nearer to God. I'm not sure, I don't think so because I dont have the app and I'm just a new member like I joined I think just this month or last month. But I saw your other post here but I'm just watching the thread and I don't think I responded.
 

blueluna5

Well-known member
Jul 30, 2018
667
399
63
#11
In need of some advice (dos and dont's) about coming out as Christian to my friends who are pretty much against any kind of Religion. It's not so much about them knowing as it as about me not having to hide it anymore. I'm afraid of how they might react, i have always been vocal about my opinions and beliefs but i can't understand why this is such a big issue now. All advice is welcome.
I would just tell them... but then I don't have any friends so you may not want to listen to my advice. 😆

Back when I did have friends even my extreme atheist roommate wrote me a poem about me having my pearls and Bible. It was nice. But be prepared to get laughed at a lot though. Hahaha You don't think people, dinosaurs, animals, every seed just happened in a few million/ billion years?? 🤣 No, it's mathematically impossible. You may laugh at them too. Hopefully it's all in good fun.

There will be certain things you can't talk to them about though.
 

soberxp

Senior Member
May 3, 2018
2,511
482
83
#12
Don't tell stories and philosophies in the name of religion. Just tell Jesus' love, his love for his enemies, his love for everyone, his patience for all injustices against him. These things are worth telling, not in a religious way
 

maxwel

Senior Member
Apr 18, 2013
9,526
2,609
113
#13
Sharing your faith with your friends... isn't just about THEM.

It does a lot for YOU.


1.) It gives you severe accountability.
They're going to watch you now, to see if you are living up to your Christian confession. And you KNOW they'll be watching you. This may seem like a lot of pressure, but it's really a good thing. It helps you to remember who you are, and that pressure of people watching you is ultimately good for you.

2.) It will separate the people who would pull you back into sin.
The people who most seek sin, and most dislike God... these people will feel uncomfortable around you. They won't want to be around you. You won't have to ask any terrible people to keep their distance... they will all leave on their own.
FYI... they'll leave a lot faster if you actually share the gospel with them.
It will pain them.
For a young believer, God uses this to protect you.

3.) For people who are interested in God, but won't admit it publicly... they have you to talk to now. You may find yourself doing some evangelism, and even counseling.
You will usually find a few people who are curious about the things of God, but they don't know who to talk to. Well, those people can now talk to you. You may find many or few, or you may find them fast or slow... but God will bring them to you in his time.


When you accept Christ as your savior, you become a new thing, a new man, a new creature.
You are a new person, with a new kind of life.
This is part of your new life.
Telling everyone what you are... that is part of the new life.
You have to trust God... and start taking steps forward.
Walk out into your new life.
: )
.
 

Bingo

Well-known member
Feb 9, 2019
9,422
4,837
113
#14
Sharing your faith with your friends... isn't just about THEM.

It does a lot for YOU.


1.) It gives you severe accountability.
They're going to watch you now, to see if you are living up to your Christian confession. And you KNOW they'll be watching you. This may seem like a lot of pressure, but it's really a good thing. It helps you to remember who you are, and that pressure of people watching you is ultimately good for you.

2.) It will separate the people who would pull you back into sin.
The people who most seek sin, and most dislike God... these people will feel uncomfortable around you. They won't want to be around you. You won't have to ask any terrible people to keep their distance... they will all leave on their own.
FYI... they'll leave a lot faster if you actually share the gospel with them.
It will pain them.
For a young believer, God uses this to protect you.

3.) For people who are interested in God, but won't admit it publicly... they have you to talk to now. You may find yourself doing some evangelism, and even counseling.
You will usually find a few people who are curious about the things of God, but they don't know who to talk to. Well, those people can now talk to you. You may find many or few, or you may find them fast or slow... but God will bring them to you in his time.


When you accept Christ as your savior, you become a new thing, a new man, a new creature.
You are a new person, with a new kind of life.
This is part of your new life.
Telling everyone what you are... that is part of the new life.
You have to trust God... and start taking steps forward.
Walk out into your new life.
: )
.
"Sound words appear rare, and thanks for sharing some sound words."
Friendly.png
 
Feb 1, 2023
82
51
18
#15
I would just tell them... but then I don't have any friends so you may not want to listen to my advice. 😆

Back when I did have friends even my extreme atheist roommate wrote me a poem about me having my pearls and Bible. It was nice. But be prepared to get laughed at a lot though. Hahaha You don't think people, dinosaurs, animals, every seed just happened in a few million/ billion years?? 🤣 No, it's mathematically impossible. You may laugh at them too. Hopefully it's all in good fun.

There will be certain things you can't talk to them about though.
The way you described it would be the best case scenario, worst case scenario they stop calling and they start talking (behind my back) but im also prepared for that outcome.
 
Feb 1, 2023
82
51
18
#16
Sharing your faith with your friends... isn't just about THEM.

It does a lot for YOU.


1.) It gives you severe accountability.
They're going to watch you now, to see if you are living up to your Christian confession. And you KNOW they'll be watching you. This may seem like a lot of pressure, but it's really a good thing. It helps you to remember who you are, and that pressure of people watching you is ultimately good for you.

2.) It will separate the people who would pull you back into sin.
The people who most seek sin, and most dislike God... these people will feel uncomfortable around you. They won't want to be around you. You won't have to ask any terrible people to keep their distance... they will all leave on their own.
FYI... they'll leave a lot faster if you actually share the gospel with them.
It will pain them.
For a young believer, God uses this to protect you.

3.) For people who are interested in God, but won't admit it publicly... they have you to talk to now. You may find yourself doing some evangelism, and even counseling.
You will usually find a few people who are curious about the things of God, but they don't know who to talk to. Well, those people can now talk to you. You may find many or few, or you may find them fast or slow... but God will bring them to you in his time.


When you accept Christ as your savior, you become a new thing, a new man, a new creature.
You are a new person, with a new kind of life.
This is part of your new life.
Telling everyone what you are... that is part of the new life.
You have to trust God... and start taking steps forward.
Walk out into your new life.
: )
.
I heard this from other people too and some i figured out by myself. I guess there really isnt much bad that can come out from telling them.But maybe not yet, i should probably work on myself a bit before i do or let Christ work in me a bit longer.
 

MaryM

Well-known member
Nov 25, 2022
513
320
63
#17
In need of some advice (dos and dont's) about coming out as Christian to my friends who are pretty much against any kind of Religion. It's not so much about them knowing as it as about me not having to hide it anymore. I'm afraid of how they might react, i have always been vocal about my opinions and beliefs but i can't understand why this is such a big issue now. All advice is welcome.
Firstly, welcome! Your soul is safe at last and forever. Heaven awaits.

Secondly, just tell them simply and privately, each friend. You will find they will respect you and will be rather in awe. Maybe they too think about it. Tell them why and how, then see what happens. I bet they will have lots of questions.
I hope and pray all will turn out far better than you imagined.

You are extra brave because you have been so vocal about being opposed to Christianity.
 

Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
61,134
30,268
113
#18
I heard this from other people too and some i figured out by myself. I guess there really isn't much bad that can come out
from telling them. But maybe not yet, i should probably work on myself a bit before i do or let Christ work in me a bit longer.
It may be that Christ will work in you all the more as you face your fears in relation to rejection from your friends upon disclosing the facts of your faith to them. What kind of friends would they be if they were to reject you on such a basis? Even if they did, are there not those with whom you become friends who share your faith? Do you have a home church? Please excuse me if you have already stated this...
 

cv5

Well-known member
Nov 20, 2018
23,778
8,613
113
#19
I heard this from other people too and some i figured out by myself. I guess there really isnt much bad that can come out from telling them.But maybe not yet, i should probably work on myself a bit before i do or let Christ work in me a bit longer.
I would recommend doing both at the same time: witnessing and following up (over time) with in-depth Bible studies by which you can support your claims.

To the first point, remember Johah. The only message he gave was the equivalent of a bedraggled man carrying a placard saying "The End is Near!" And what a response!

Jon 3:4
And Jonah began to enter into the city a day's journey, and he cried, and said, Yet forty days, and Nineveh shall be overthrown.

To the second, think about Paul and his exquisite scholarly arguments and rebuttals. Which would not be possible but for his indwelling of the Spirit AND his encyclopedic knowledge of the Scriptures.
 

cv5

Well-known member
Nov 20, 2018
23,778
8,613
113
#20
I heard this from other people too and some i figured out by myself. I guess there really isnt much bad that can come out from telling them.But maybe not yet, i should probably work on myself a bit before i do or let Christ work in me a bit longer.
2Ti 3:14
But continue thou in the things which thou hast learned and hast been assured of, knowing of whom thou hast learned them;

Paul exhorting his protegee. Are we all not all likewise protegee's?