Gaslighting among Christians

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ResidentAlien

ResidentAlien

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Apr 21, 2021
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The textbook definition of gaslighting is: To manipulate someone such that they doubt their own memory, perceptions of reality, or sanity, typically for malevolent reasons.

Many Christian groups and individuals, especially those who feel their authority is being threatened resort to gaslighting. If you question these people they try to turn it around on you and make you doubt yourself; that your perception of reality isn't true and that you are the one with a problem. A very common tactic is to resort to name-calling such as Pharisee, Jezebel, or hater.

I don't think it's necessary to dwell on this; everyone has encountered these people or churches at one time or another. But I do think it's important to recognize them for what they are. They're abusers really and there's no place for abuse among Christians. If you're involved in a abusive church, don't walk, run; it's doesn't get better.
 
Dino246

Dino246

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#2
Jun 30, 2015
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Perhaps we should include within the category of "gaslighting" the criticism of others' accounts of hearing God speak... unless the message was clearly contra-Biblical.
 
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Locoponydirtman

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#3
#3
ResidentAlien said:
The textbook definition of gaslighting is: To manipulate someone such that they doubt their own memory, perceptions of reality, or sanity, typically for malevolent reasons.

Many Christian groups and individuals, especially those who feel their authority is being threatened resort to gaslighting. If you question these people they try to turn it around on you and make you doubt yourself; that your perception of reality isn't true and that you are the one with a problem. A very common tactic is to resort to name-calling such as Pharisee, Jezebel, or hater.

I don't think it's necessary to dwell on this; everyone has encountered these people or churches at one time or another. But I do think it's important to recognize them for what they are. They're abusers really and there's no place for abuse among Christians. If you're involved in a abusive church, don't walk, run; it's doesn't get better.
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It happens on this forum all the time. I guess then you just have to call them out, and let them be the narcissist that they are.
 
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presidente

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May 29, 2013
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Is there any example of gaslighting in the Bible?

I Kings 18 comes to mind, where Ahab tries to blame Elijah for troubling Israel, when actually Ahab was troubling Israel for the idolatry. Maybe Ahab blamed Elijah for the drought, since it wasn't going to rain, Elijah said, except at Elijah's word. Jezebel probably held off on trying to kill him because she wanted it to rain again someday. Then after Elijah had had the prophets of her gods killed, and it was raining anyway, she threatened to kill him.


17 And it came to pass, when Ahab saw Elijah, that Ahab said unto him, Art thou he that troubleth Israel?

18 And he answered, I have not troubled Israel; but thou, and thy father's house, in that ye have forsaken the commandments of the Lord, and thou hast followed Baalim.
 
ResidentAlien

ResidentAlien

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presidente said:
Is there any example of gaslighting in the Bible?

I Kings 18 comes to mind, where Ahab tries to blame Elijah for troubling Israel, when actually Ahab was troubling Israel for the idolatry. Maybe Ahab blamed Elijah for the drought, since it wasn't going to rain, Elijah said, except at Elijah's word. Jezebel probably held off on trying to kill him because she wanted it to rain again someday. Then after Elijah had had the prophets of her gods killed, and it was raining anyway, she threatened to kill him.


17 And it came to pass, when Ahab saw Elijah, that Ahab said unto him, Art thou he that troubleth Israel?

18 And he answered, I have not troubled Israel; but thou, and thy father's house, in that ye have forsaken the commandments of the Lord, and thou hast followed Baalim.
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Yes, this is an excellent example. Another is the example of Micaiah in 1 Kings 22. 400 prophets prophesied that Ahab would be victorious over Ramoth-gilead. No doubt they wanted the King's approval rather than God's, and with good reason. Jehoshaphat asked if there were any other prophets and Ahab replied: "There is one more man who could consult the LORD for us, but I hate him. He never prophesies anything but trouble for me! His name is Micaiah son of Imlah." So apparently it was Micaiah's fault the Lord told him to prophesy against Ahab. Later Micaiah was put in prison and fed on bread and water for his trouble.

"Blessed are you when they revile and persecute you, and say all kinds of evil against you falsely for My sake." Matthew 5:11
 
studentoftheword

studentoftheword

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Nov 12, 2021
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ResidentAlien said:
They're abusers really and there's no place for abuse among Christians.
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OH WOW ! coming from someone who likes trash and bash with judgment and criticism of the mega Churches --I say maybe you need to take your own advice and put it into practice --just saying ----

Is Judging and Criticizing a form of abuse and gas lighting ----I think it is ------

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/.../202010/7-signs-passive-aggressive-gaslighter
Although many forms of gaslighting are overt and obtrusive (i.e. persistent and false verbal attacks, accusations, condescension, judgement, and criticism), there are also passive-aggressive forms of gaslighting that are more subtle and difficult to detect at the outset, and can carry the same negative contagion and toxic manipulativeness as overt gaslighting.
 
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presidente

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#7
May 29, 2013
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ResidentAlien said:
Jehoshaphat asked if there were any other prophets and Ahab replied: "There is one more man who could consult the LORD for us, but I hate him. He never prophesies anything but trouble for me! His name is Micaiah son of Imlah." So apparently it was Micaiah's fault the Lord told him to prophesy against Ahab. Later Micaiah was put in prison and fed on bread and water for his trouble.
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Ahab had some nerve, demanding the man prophesy the truth, then imprisoning him for doing so.

But where is the gaslighting in this story?
 
ResidentAlien

ResidentAlien

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Apr 21, 2021
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presidente said:
Ahab had some nerve, demanding the man prophesy the truth, then imprisoning him for doing so.

But where is the gaslighting in this story?
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He didn't like what the Lord said through Micaiah so he blamed the messenger instead of the message. All gaslighting is an attempt to make someone doubt themself; to make them think they have a problem rather than the one doing the gaslighting, or confuse them about what their own senses tell them is true.

Ahab had Micaiah thrown in prison for telling him the truth. This would cause many men to seriously doubt themself. Back then they threw people in prison; nowadays they try to shame them by calling them names.
 
Beckie

Beckie

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Feb 15, 2022
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Seems to me when really look back at things, thoughts, ideas i have posted i can find myself on the giving and receiving end of gaslighting.
 
Pilgrimshope

Pilgrimshope

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ResidentAlien said:
The textbook definition of gaslighting is: To manipulate someone such that they doubt their own memory, perceptions of reality, or sanity, typically for malevolent reasons.

Many Christian groups and individuals, especially those who feel their authority is being threatened resort to gaslighting. If you question these people they try to turn it around on you and make you doubt yourself; that your perception of reality isn't true and that you are the one with a problem. A very common tactic is to resort to name-calling such as Pharisee, Jezebel, or hater.

I don't think it's necessary to dwell on this; everyone has encountered these people or churches at one time or another. But I do think it's important to recognize them for what they are. They're abusers really and there's no place for abuse among Christians. If you're involved in a abusive church, don't walk, run; it's doesn't get better.
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A lamp shines in darkness , it doesnt shine in an already well Light room
 
Lanolin

Lanolin

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Dec 15, 2018
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mega churches probably came about just like bigbox stores and walmart. Consolidation or merger of smaller churches.
They work with large mobile populations as peoole dont live in small towns or villages anymore.

Anyway I wouldnt knock them if they preaching the gospel and putting Jesus name out there. Besides everyone can have the opportunity to read the Bible for themselves nobody is FORCED to sit under any one teacher now its freely available.
 
Snacks

Snacks

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#13
Feb 10, 2022
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ResidentAlien said:
The textbook definition of gaslighting is: To manipulate someone such that they doubt their own memory, perceptions of reality, or sanity, typically for malevolent reasons.

Many Christian groups and individuals, especially those who feel their authority is being threatened resort to gaslighting. If you question these people they try to turn it around on you and make you doubt yourself; that your perception of reality isn't true and that you are the one with a problem. A very common tactic is to resort to name-calling such as Pharisee, Jezebel, or hater.

I don't think it's necessary to dwell on this; everyone has encountered these people or churches at one time or another. But I do think it's important to recognize them for what they are. They're abusers really and there's no place for abuse among Christians. If you're involved in a abusive church, don't walk, run; it's doesn't get better.
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Many seminaries are the same way. I refused to tow the pervasive leftist theological line and was called in by the powers that be for refusing to take the blue pill.
 
PennEd

PennEd

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Apr 22, 2013
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#14
ResidentAlien said:
The textbook definition of gaslighting is: To manipulate someone such that they doubt their own memory, perceptions of reality, or sanity, typically for malevolent reasons.

Many Christian groups and individuals, especially those who feel their authority is being threatened resort to gaslighting. If you question these people they try to turn it around on you and make you doubt yourself; that your perception of reality isn't true and that you are the one with a problem. A very common tactic is to resort to name-calling such as Pharisee, Jezebel, or hater.

I don't think it's necessary to dwell on this; everyone has encountered these people or churches at one time or another. But I do think it's important to recognize them for what they are. They're abusers really and there's no place for abuse among Christians. If you're involved in a abusive church, don't walk, run; it's doesn't get better.
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But what’s the correlation between that definition and what a gaslight is?

gas·light

a type of lamp in which an incandescent mantle is heated by a jet of burning gas.
"an era of gaslights and horse-drawn carriages
 
L

Locoponydirtman

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#15
#15
PennEd said:
But what’s the correlation between that definition and what a gaslight is?

gas·light

a type of lamp in which an incandescent mantle is heated by a jet of burning gas.
"an era of gaslights and horse-drawn carriages
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It comes from a play called, " The Gaslight".
In the play a man continually turns down the gas lights making it more and more dim in the house, while treating his wife as though she were crazy for thinking that the lights are getting dim.
 
P

presidente

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May 29, 2013
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ResidentAlien said:
He didn't like what the Lord said through Micaiah so he blamed the messenger instead of the message. All gaslighting is an attempt to make someone doubt themself; to make them think they have a problem rather than the one doing the gaslighting, or confuse them about what their own senses tell them is true.
Click to expand...

I thought gaslighting was trying to convince someone that what happened did not happen.
 
R

Runningman

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Mar 4, 2020
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ResidentAlien said:
The textbook definition of gaslighting is: To manipulate someone such that they doubt their own memory, perceptions of reality, or sanity, typically for malevolent reasons.

Many Christian groups and individuals, especially those who feel their authority is being threatened resort to gaslighting. If you question these people they try to turn it around on you and make you doubt yourself; that your perception of reality isn't true and that you are the one with a problem. A very common tactic is to resort to name-calling such as Pharisee, Jezebel, or hater.

I don't think it's necessary to dwell on this; everyone has encountered these people or churches at one time or another. But I do think it's important to recognize them for what they are. They're abusers really and there's no place for abuse among Christians. If you're involved in a abusive church, don't walk, run; it's doesn't get better.
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People use all sorts of logical fallacies and psychological manipulation techniques, but I noticed it’s most prominent on Internet forums.

I think most of the time it’s a self-defense mechanism. It’s more convenient for most people if everyone else has a problem because it gives them the grace and liberty to not confront difficult truths, public embarrassment, or change in general.

In religion it seems to be more prominent. In my prayers it has come to me that many people love lies more than they love Jesus. Seems this has been a problem since the beginning, too.
 
TheNarrowPath

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Jul 17, 2022
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Locoponydirtman said:
It happens on this forum all the time. I guess then you just have to call them out, and let them be the narcissist that they are.
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Yes it happened in my thread, writing about a narcissist brought out another narcissist and in the end they always reveal their true selves.
 
Jocund

Jocund

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Jan 14, 2021
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So long as you call out gaslighting when it happens and understand that other people see it too, it loses its traction as a manipulation technique.

Not all kinds of gaslighting are inherently bad. You could tell a child experiencing fear that they "never really felt fear, they just think they do" as a well to reconfigure their thoughts into thinking of themselves as brave and thus will place them in a mental state more resistant to fear. We often fall into a condition of gaslighting ourselves and subconscious (or unconsciously) cherry pick life experiences that reflect how we esteem ourselves. Sometimes this forms a basis for authentic pride (the good form of pride) and other times it can be a basis for hubristic pride (the bad kind of pride).

Moral balancing is also a kind of subconscious mental conditioning (more or less a form of self-gaslighting) that lets us feel like we are 'good people'. An example of this is in the parable of the Pharisee and the Publican.


ResidentAlien said:
A very common tactic is to resort to name-calling such as Pharisee, Jezebel, or hater.
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It's important not to forget that it is entirely possible that someone has a heretical Pharisee-like legalistic view, or that they can be hateful, or have infidelity between their doctrines and scripture. We should be careful not to aggravate the gaslight that these people would not exist. Sometimes the criticisms are completely fair and reflective of what the person is actually doing.
 
P

presidente

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May 29, 2013
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Jocund said:
You could tell a child experiencing fear that they "never really felt fear, they just think they do" as a well to reconfigure their thought
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I think that would just confuse the child. Especially a small one.
 
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