Things NOT to say on your first date....

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Him: “what would you like to order?”
Her: “ummmm, hmmmmm, ermmmmmmmm”












**20 minutes later**








Her: “Ohh just salad please”.
 
I forgot to send you the police vetting from, but not to worry I rpinted out a copy and have it here. You can fill it out and I'll send it off so we can go on another date about 3 weeks from now. I hear theres a bit of a backlog with the Police.
 
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Reactions: Mel85
My dad’s got a 12 gauge.
No darlin' - this is never the wrong thing to say on a first date - he probably has one too (so - cool :cool: ) - and, if he is truly going to treat you right :love: - he is not worried about your dad having a shotgun... ;)

On the other hand - if he has one too - it may draw his attention away from you somewhat - because, he will want to know what kind your dad has, etc. :p

:LOL:
 
You look nice
Mind if I take your photo on my phone?
Can you just undress a bit more for me.
 
"Do you have any Preparation H that I can borrow?"
Hey when you need relief bad enough... You gonna break down and ask. Just saying.

Comedian quote:
"Remember when the president had the hemmoroids? That like to worried me to death, lemme tell ya. The man with his finger on the nuclear button, I don't want him in that much pain.

They got him fixed up though, got him seen to by a navy physician... A rear admiral."
 
"Hey, you like me right? Let me introduce you to my parole officer so he can hear that someone thinks I'm a good person. He doesn't think I am a good guy."
 
Just for fun, I’ll start.

“When do I move in?”.

😂

"Hi, my name is George. I'm unemployed and live with my parents." ~ George Costanza

Of course this may not be the best example as this actually worked out for him. But, I tried this 'oppositism' tack once, and, well, it didn't :D