"Not Physically Attracted Enough" - Vs - "Friendship that Catches Fire"

[Gojira]

I have not been attracted to some and then later down the line developed an attraction to them. It can be their kindness, genuineness, even their ability to stay calm despite whatever is going on. It shows that the inside is important.

I always say if attraction is so important why do many people in the media who are considered highly attractive such as models, actors etc have spouses who cheat on them? Could it be that we have all been trained to think attractiveness is of the highest importance?

Now, being married to Hillary Clinton, I almost understand Bill's infidelities. Uh almost that is. But, Hillary's not hot. At all. So I guess this whole response is kind of irrelevant

 

[Lynx]

Of course, I'm assuming you're replying to my thread topic, and generally, or specifically, to what I wrote, and to me. Correct me if I'm wrong.

Regarding your post here, I have to say, I'm not really sure what you're saying. I know you have wisdom and my ears are wide open. I'm sure my post revealed what's important to me... what does it reveal about me; and how can we use this info in a beneficial way? Thanks!

No idea dude. I can't see your face from here. A person's face usually tells me a lot more than words on a screen.

 

[JesusLives]

Hold on...laundry list...

Is this why Tourist is always posting about going to the laundrymat?

He's lucky as list was down to a heart beat by the time I met him...lol

 

[Lanolin]

He's lucky as list was down to a heart beat by the time I met him...lol

haha

how long was it orignally

I didnt even know you even had to have a list to do laundry.

 

[JesusLives]

haha

how long was it orignally

I didnt even know you even had to have a list to do laundry.

You know the young list

Good looking
Good sense of humor
Not more than 10 years older or 5 years younger
Dark hair
Foreigner - as I thought they were more family oriented than US guys
Good job
Doesn't cheat
Taller than me.... I'm short so that didn't take much


I always went for love never a rich guy.

But that was some of my laundry list which was much longer in my younger days

 

[Sculpt]

I have not been attracted to some and then later down the line developed an attraction to them. It can be their kindness, genuineness, even their ability to stay calm despite whatever is going on. It shows that the inside is important.

I always say if attraction is so important why do many people in the media who are considered highly attractive such as models, actors etc have spouses who cheat on them? Could it be that we have all been trained to think attractiveness is of the highest importance?

True, very attractive people, such as actors and models, have spouses who cheat on them and leave them. Part of that is they know they are partly in a rat race for publicity and getting favors... like hollywood show marriages for publicity or a model marrying a big movie producer... sometimes those are marriages of convenience, that situation can change fast. And I would suspect attractive, rich and powerful people tend to think there will always be lots of green grass fields for them, so they are willing to put someone else first 50-100% of the time. The wiser know you have to be a good person to keep a good person.

I don't think anyone was trained to think attractiveness is of the highest importance, especially people who grew up in the church and with good families. Rather I think most people think physical attraction is not the most important, just an essential element for a mate.

Most people don't select their friends based on physical attractiveness. I think most want their spouse to be their best friend, but they know a spouse is not the same thing as a friend... lots of friends can't be your spouse. Isn't this the essence of the issue?

A Proverb warns about the vanity of beauty as well as the deceitfulness of charm, but not the functionality of physical attractiveness. Proverbs 31:30 ESV: Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Proverbs 5:19 ESV: A lovely deer, a graceful doe. Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight; be intoxicated always in her love.

 

[Gojira]

True, very attractive people, such as actors and models, have spouses who cheat on them and leave them. Part of that is they know they are partly in a rat race for publicity and getting favors... like hollywood show marriages for publicity or a model marrying a big movie producer... sometimes those are marriages of convenience, that situation can change fast. And I would suspect attractive, rich and powerful people tend to think there will always be lots of green grass fields for them, so they are willing to put someone else first 50-100% of the time. The wiser know you have to be a good person to keep a good person.

I don't think anyone was trained to think attractiveness is of the highest importance, especially people who grew up in the church and with good families. Rather I think most people think physical attraction is not the most important, just an essential element for a mate.

Most people don't select their friends based on physical attractiveness. I think most want their spouse to be their best friend, but they know a spouse is not the same thing as a friend... lots of friends can't be your spouse. Isn't this the essence of the issue?

A Proverb warns about the vanity of beauty as well as the deceitfulness of charm, but not the functionality of physical attractiveness. Proverbs 31:30 ESV: Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Proverbs 5:19 ESV: A lovely deer, a graceful doe. Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight; be intoxicated always in her love.

Said really well. Glad I thought of it

 

[Lanolin]

let her breast be filled with silicone? isnt that a toxic substance or am I confusing that with botox.

too much milk can be toxic to those who are lactose intolerant as well

 

[Lanolin]

babies arent physical attracted visually but the first thing they want to do is touch, not see

so sensory stimulation is probably MORE important than visual. If it doesnt feel right (scratchy, itchy, rough) you wouldnt want to touch it. A spouse is someone you CAN touch and allow into your private space.

A spouse isnt just someone you SEE all the time.

 

[Lanolin]

I think thats why children love slime

I dont really get it, it can come in all colours but they just like the FEEL of it.
Also I notice even with books, they might not go for the most colourful ones but the ones that FEEL right, like they have cloth covers and embossing on them, the number of pages or the size of them rather than the pictures.

And then its like how that book makes them feel when they are reading it. Is it an enjoyable experience. Thats what people remember

 

[Lanolin]

I had clay, but sometimes it went hard and you couldnt mould it, but with slime, its goopy and doesn thave any shape but you can always squish it. You cant BREAK slime.

 

[JohnDB]

There is a story about a beauty contestant in the Bible.

Let's just say that she didn't win in the end.

 

[Beckie]

Lyrics

Hey, hey, hey, hey
If you want to be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So for my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you
If you want to be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So for my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you
A pretty woman makes her husband look small
And very often causes his downfall
As soon as he married her and then she starts
To do the things that will break his heart
But if you make an ugly woman your wife
Ah you'll be happy for the rest of your life
An ugly woman cooks meals on time
She'll always give you peace of mind
If you want to be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So for my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you
Don't let your friends say you have no taste
Go ahead and marry anyway
Though her face is ugly, her eyes don't match
Take it from me, she's a better catch
If you want to be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So for my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you
Say man! Hey baby!
I saw your wife the other day!
Yeah? Yeah, an' she's ugly!
Yeah, she's ugly, but she sure can cook, baby!
Yeah, alright!
If you want to be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So for my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you
If you want to be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So for my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you
If you want to be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So for my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you
If you want to be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So for my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you

 

[Beckie]

Back when I was single and dating....
And even in college....a Long long time ago in a land far far away.

I figured out quick that dating "barbie" was usually going to be a disaster.

Because in my psych class I learned that familiarity breeds contempt and no matter what everyone turns into wrinkled Grey old people. (Like I am today)

And as I paid attention to those people who are married successfully the best marriages had a type of naked honesty and no separation between them. Talking to one was like talking to the other.

Some marriages are more successful than others. And some had their relationship with God as a centerpiece of their relationship and others didn't.

We, as Christians, want both things at the same time. It's unique and special. And it isn't going to be common or average or Even normal. Meaning rare, and treasured. Not gonna happen for everyone. And taking a very long time to find. It's that age old question: "The Lady or The Tiger?" Which door do you tell to open? Which is she?

I'm surrounded by people who don't have what I have as a relationship with my wife. They look at me oddly at times. Like when I say that I wanted to have lunch or breakfast with my wife before I meet up. Even though we have been in quarantine for two years.

But it's the truth...I like as well as love my wife. She isn't an accessory to be worked around. Her life is my life. My life is her life. Who do you want to be in 20 years? Why?

As Mrs. DB and I go through adventures together in life it is fun....the discovery and learning...we are having fun. She is responsible for me and I am responsible for her. All giving all the time. Difficult to obtain for today's self-absorbed world.

That's the attraction. That's the goal. Barbie doesn't get excited watching her husband change brakes on his truck. Or care if he has company while doing it.
She gets excited when everyone finds her attractive.
Barbie doesn't care about discussing scriptures and looking at the various things that they teach. She might politely listen...but doesn't add much to the conversation.

But get Barbie talking about possessions, makeup, hair, clothes, workout or dieting routines and she pops up like a jack in the box playing music. Uggghhhh.

No thanks....I'll keep the path less traveled.

You are a hero !

 

[Sculpt]

There is a story about a beauty contestant in the Bible.

Let's just say that she didn't win in the end.

Which story in the bible is about a beauty contestant? Naturally I'd guess you meant Esther... If so, I forget the story precisely, how was it she didn't win in the end?

 

[JohnDB]

You are a hero !

I'm no hero..

I'm the villain.

Just ask my ex wife...she will be glad to falsely accuse me of any number of horrible things. She valued nothing that I did. But...you live and learn....experience is a mean teacher and a fool will learn by no other. So I'll admit to being a fool...cause I'm guilty as charged.

Marriage only lasts for a while...
Ex-wives last forever....oh my do they last forever!

 

[JohnDB]

Which story in the bible is about a beauty contestant? Naturally I'd guess you meant Esther... If so, I forget the story precisely, how was it she didn't win in the end?

Near the end of David's life.

 

[Gojira]

There is a story about a beauty contestant in the Bible.

Let's just say that she didn't win in the end.

Esther did win, and she won big.

 

[Gojira]

I'm no hero..

I'm the villain.

Just ask my ex wife...she will be glad to falsely accuse me of any number of horrible things. She valued nothing that I did. But...you live and learn....experience is a mean teacher and a fool will learn by no other. So I'll admit to being a fool...cause I'm guilty as charged.

Marriage only lasts for a while...
Ex-wives last forever....oh my do they last forever!

No, they eventually die.

 

[Gojira]

Lyrics

Hey, hey, hey, hey
If you want to be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So for my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you
If you want to be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So for my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you
A pretty woman makes her husband look small
And very often causes his downfall
As soon as he married her and then she starts
To do the things that will break his heart
But if you make an ugly woman your wife
Ah you'll be happy for the rest of your life
An ugly woman cooks meals on time
She'll always give you peace of mind
If you want to be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So for my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you
Don't let your friends say you have no taste
Go ahead and marry anyway
Though her face is ugly, her eyes don't match
Take it from me, she's a better catch
If you want to be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So for my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you
Say man! Hey baby!
I saw your wife the other day!
Yeah? Yeah, an' she's ugly!
Yeah, she's ugly, but she sure can cook, baby!
Yeah, alright!
If you want to be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So for my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you
If you want to be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So for my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you
If you want to be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So for my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you
If you want to be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So for my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you

Bleh.