Struggle with Masturbation

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DrGuyPhD

Member
#1
May 23, 2020
58
47
18
#1
Hey everyone,

I needed a space where I confess and process this issue. Not many people talk about masturbation as its own problem. But I have found that it's harder to stop an addiction where the only thing you need is yourself and your mind. I have been struggling for years. Going through all the breakthroughs and lows too. And I am tired of it. I am tired of the struggle. Tired of going to my parents because I feel like God wants to give me a consequence I can learn from. Tired of failing. Tired of fighting. I wish it would just stop. I wish someone would just take it away. Right now I feel weary. I was fighting the temptation for days and I was winning until today. I am so sorry to the lord and my parents for any and every hurt I have caused them by involving them in this decaying fight. But what do I even begin to do? I'm just tired.
 
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TheIndianGirl

Guest
#2
#2
What exactly happened today that caused you to masturbate, when you have been "clean" for days? If you masturbate to online images/videos, very likely you are involved with the exploitation of women. You should care more about the women you exploit, and partaking in this activity, more than your own desires and feelings of self-pity. When you masturbate, you are in a state of rebellion. I think you already know this. This is not something that is totally outside your control. You may need to seek professional counseling. Sorry if I sound harsh but I have very little patience on this issue.
 
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Dooms

Junior Member
#3
Feb 8, 2018
70
69
18
#3
This can be a particularly insidious habit, spiritually speaking. The primary sin isn't the masturbation itself, but in where our attitude is with the opposite sex. As a man, I know how my hormones direct me to objectify women often, and this world is SHITTY in this respect.

So for me getting out of this involved less worrying about my body having desires than relearning that women are in fact as much as human beings as I am. If I find myself "checking out" a woman, I remind myself that this is not only somebody's daughter, but a Child of God as well.

Good luck, and pray often!
 
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DrGuyPhD

Member
#4
May 23, 2020
58
47
18
#4
TheIndianGirl said:
What exactly happened today that caused you to masturbate, when you have been "clean" for days? If you masturbate to online images/videos, very likely you are involved with the exploitation of women. You should care more about the women you exploit, and partaking in this activity, more than your own desires and feelings of self-pity. When you masturbate, you are in a state of rebellion. I think you already know this. This is not something that is totally outside your control. You may need to seek professional counseling. Sorry if I sound harsh but I have very little patience on this issue.
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No. I had no porn or anything. Just my head. And I didn't even think lustful thoughts really.
 
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TheIndianGirl

Guest
#5
#5
DrGuyPhD said:
No. I had no porn or anything. Just my head. And I didn't even think lustful thoughts really.
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Ok, this sounds more like an anxiety issue than one related to sexual immorality (since lustful thoughts are really not involved).
 
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News_from_Heaven

New member
#6
Oct 1, 2021
27
21
3
#6
God is eternal. He is the beginning and the end. He exists outside of time and knows all things past, present, and future. When Jesus died as a blameless sin offering for you and me 2000 years ago, he knew who you were and what you would do. He knew who you would be before you knew who he was and he knew who you would be after you joined his kingdom. And even so, he still chose to die for you because he loves you. He is the good shepherd. None of his sheep can be stolen from his hand by anyone. If you believe in him you are one of his sheep and you have the Holy Spirit. Ask the Lord for self-control. Don't try to fight the war yourself. Stay vigilant and resist the enemy before you give in to temptation. Know yourself enough to know how you felt and what you were thinking before you gave in to temptation, so that you may have the advantage next time. If you find that next time you are not vigilant, open the Bible and read. Read all night if you have to, but don't stop reading and asking the Spirit to reveal God's words to you. Read until you pass out from fatigue, fighting a war is hard work. Keep a Bible within arm's reach of wherever you are when you sin. A physical Bible is better than an app because your technology may be another temptation. And remember, we are not saved by works but by faith. But that doesn't mean we keep on sinning. Our sinful state past, present, and future was nailed to the cross with Jesus. Ask the Lord to make you alive to that truth. Walk with the Lord every second of every day and remember, Jesus is alive today and one day you will see him in front of you.

1 Cor 2:11 (NIV): "No, we declare God's wisdom, a mystery that has been hidden and that God destined for our glory before time began."
John 10:14 (NIV): "I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me-"
John 10:27-29 (NIV): "My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me. I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one will snatch them out of my hand. My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all; no one can snatch them out of my Father's hand."
 
happy_butsad08

happy_butsad08

New member
#7
Jul 1, 2021
21
17
3
#7
DrGuyPhD said:
Hey everyone,

I needed a space where I confess and process this issue. Not many people talk about masturbation as its own problem. But I have found that it's harder to stop an addiction where the only thing you need is yourself and your mind. I have been struggling for years. Going through all the breakthroughs and lows too. And I am tired of it. I am tired of the struggle. Tired of going to my parents because I feel like God wants to give me a consequence I can learn from. Tired of failing. Tired of fighting. I wish it would just stop. I wish someone would just take it away. Right now I feel weary. I was fighting the temptation for days and I was winning until today. I am so sorry to the lord and my parents for any and every hurt I have caused them by involving them in this decaying fight. But what do I even begin to do? I'm just tired.
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I used to struggle with this a lot and I still do struggle with it somewhat..... The best thing to do is to not look at sexually tempting things like smut or pornography.
 
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Yaj1979

New member
#8
Nov 9, 2021
29
16
3
#8
DrGuyPhD said:
Hey everyone,

I needed a space where I confess and process this issue. Not many people talk about masturbation as its own problem. But I have found that it's harder to stop an addiction where the only thing you need is yourself and your mind. I have been struggling for years. Going through all the breakthroughs and lows too. And I am tired of it. I am tired of the struggle. Tired of going to my parents because I feel like God wants to give me a consequence I can learn from. Tired of failing. Tired of fighting. I wish it would just stop. I wish someone would just take it away. Right now I feel weary. I was fighting the temptation for days and I was winning until today. I am so sorry to the lord and my parents for any and every hurt I have caused them by involving them in this decaying fight. But what do I even begin to do? I'm just tired.
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I completely understand exactly what you are going through.....I have been dealing with that for almost 20 years....it was affecting my marriage and my life and I prayed about it and saw several videos and sought out Christian counseling about it and and since that day I haven't even thought about it in almost a month.....its EXTREMELY hard...but with gods help and the help of others you can pull through it
 
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DrGuyPhD

Member
#9
May 23, 2020
58
47
18
#9
Yaj1979 said:
I completely understand exactly what you are going through.....I have been dealing with that for almost 20 years....it was affecting my marriage and my life and I prayed about it and saw several videos and sought out Christian counseling about it and and since that day I haven't even thought about it in almost a month.....its EXTREMELY hard...but with gods help and the help of others you can pull through it
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Praise God!! Thank you so much! Your testimony really blessed me. I pray that God will continue to grace you and me to continue this race.
 
Y

Yaj1979

New member
#10
Nov 9, 2021
29
16
3
#10
Your very welcome...if you have any more questions or if there is anything you need help with at all contact me anytime that you like......
 
listenyoumustAll

listenyoumustAll

Well-known member
#11
Jul 22, 2021
404
288
63
#11
DrGuyPhD said:
Hey everyone,

I needed a space where I confess and process this issue. Not many people talk about masturbation as its own problem. But I have found that it's harder to stop an addiction where the only thing you need is yourself and your mind. I have been struggling for years. Going through all the breakthroughs and lows too. And I am tired of it. I am tired of the struggle. Tired of going to my parents because I feel like God wants to give me a consequence I can learn from. Tired of failing. Tired of fighting. I wish it would just stop. I wish someone would just take it away. Right now I feel weary. I was fighting the temptation for days and I was winning until today. I am so sorry to the lord and my parents for any and every hurt I have caused them by involving them in this decaying fight. But what do I even begin to do? I'm just tired.
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My friend I can relate to this your travail I have been through that road and was stuck on it for a number of years . God delivered me from the grasp of the immorality thankfully. First I had to study and understand that my body is not mine to defile .then I set a watch on my gates .my hearing and sight .. I will see no evil . masturbation is not the beginning but a product of lustful thinking ..Paul wriyes and explains what things we dwell our mind on which are profitable . you can't clean a house and leave it empty ,the evil will go and come with 7 more even more vicious. When you clean your temple fill it with content pertaining to life . my friend the word of God will be what you fill your thoughts with . in time you will overcome ..remember God does not condemn a repentant heart so don't think you have failed et .. You are in process ... You fail when you stop seeking to end the sin and call it nature . be encouraged ,I myself failed many times . am single yet but concerning masturbation there is no compelling desire anyone . God is your help friend .
 
brighthouse98

brighthouse98

Senior Member
#12
Apr 16, 2015
672
339
63
71
#12
Brother DrGuy I wish I could make a good excuse for doing this,as most everyone male and female suffer greatly from this need we believe we have in this area. And this is why we do it,we believe!!! we have a dire need for our body and mind sake to follow through with the flesh rather then consider what we know is right.

And brother, I do not care how strong in the Lord one might consider themselves to be we still will always fall short in one area of our flesh or another. Example using bad language,or knowing you could help a person but because you do not like them you pass them by. In truth it boils down to ones own will! I really feel sorry for single people espically young people whose hormones are going wild inside of them!

Some people just do not understand how painful it is for us who suffer from this problem. What helped me greatly in overcoming this was focus my mindset upon bringing my flesh as much peace as my Spirit in Christ has!!( Phil 4:7-9) Focus your mind as quick as you can upon verse 8!! and 9! Say it our loud. In Christ he showed me something I never thought of before because in prayer I went to the Lord about this very same problem! Holy Spirit said count from 1-10 in your mindset,as I did this now say your name outloud! SEE!!

You forgot you count!! By using my Word even speaking my Word outloud your mindset changes to me rather then you! Now I sure had to do this a lot for the first month brother, but within about 30 days my problem went away. Jesus himself show us a fine example of dealing with temptation!( Matt 4:1-11) Jesus said it is written!!

That is what I did! I followed his example brother! Now the only question we really have is how bad does one wish to stop this action?? That only each of us can answer,but the end result is ones own will!! Can we do it?? Through Christ and his word YES!! Now will we do it?? That is ones only answer.

When I served 2 Tours in Vietnam I understood just how important ones mindset is! Now as a soldier for Christ I now understand just how important it is to use to right tools to defeat both the flesh and our enemy. I hope this gives you both great hope,and as Jesus said I will provide the way of escape,but you must follow my path to escape!! ( 1 Cor 10:13) God's Word is EVERYTHING to me brother!! Both my blessing and prayers go your way!!! Just know you are loved and as you stated in Psalm8:4 Jesus is always thinking of us!! I stay thankful daily for this my brother!! ( 1 Thess 5:18) Stay in HIS WILL NOT OUR WILL!!!
 
Mii

Mii

Well-known member
#14
Mar 23, 2019
2,082
1,330
113
#14
Your body will release on its own without your assistance. It's uncomfortable but it isn't specifically stated to be "sin" when having a dream (N.E/W.D) and is mentioned in Deuteronomy. If you can't sleep, go for a run? Do some pushups/sit-ups/run in place if you are unable to go out. It is wise to do something to relieve the tension because it does cause a "bit" of a muddled thought process in the moment.

Deut 23:10. I thought that was the only one but there are quite a few actually.

I've done that with some success at times. Re-channeling that energy to something productive is actually a game-changer for a lot of young men. It's tons of energy that you have no legitimate method to release (unless outside your control in a dream) so using it for something productive and learning self-control in this area seems quite important.

You may also learn to say no in dreams and this will help you say no in the waking world as well. Some people don't feel that you can but I can assure you that I learned control even when sleeping "to an extent". Obviously ones you don't remember is another matter entirely and these are the ones I don't think are sinful.

It's only going to be like throwing your substance down the drain if you don't learn self-control in this area. I made that mistake and regret it...you reap what you sow. The Lord does provide a sort of "silver lining" even within our mistakes though. Look for that if you feel super down on yourself.

Feel free to message or profile post if anyone would like encouragement on how to get back up after a lost battle. you may have lost a battle but the war isn't over.
 
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katheren

Member
#15
Nov 13, 2021
89
50
18
#15
DrGuyPhD said:
Hey everyone,

I needed a space where I confess and process this issue. Not many people talk about masturbation as its own problem. But I have found that it's harder to stop an addiction where the only thing you need is yourself and your mind. I have been struggling for years. Going through all the breakthroughs and lows too. And I am tired of it. I am tired of the struggle. Tired of going to my parents because I feel like God wants to give me a consequence I can learn from. Tired of failing. Tired of fighting. I wish it would just stop. I wish someone would just take it away. Right now I feel weary. I was fighting the temptation for days and I was winning until today. I am so sorry to the lord and my parents for any and every hurt I have caused them by involving them in this decaying fight. But what do I even begin to do? I'm just tired.
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i strugle with some esle and i do not like it too it gos like this i started rubing my prives and i feel so tierd of it & want to stop does any one know how i can need to be free from it :cry::cry::eek::cautious::(
 
K

katheren

Member
#16
Nov 13, 2021
89
50
18
#16
katheren said:
i strugle with some esle and i do not like it too it gos like this i started rubing my prives and i feel so tierd of it & want to stop does any one know how i can need to be free from it :cry::cry::eek::cautious::(
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can any one pray for me i really need it
 
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PeteRock

New member
#19
Nov 30, 2021
3
0
1
#19
Katheren, I shall be praying for you and I also want to encourage you. You have been brave enough to share what is troubling you. Bringing such things to the light is the start of a change. Also, I can share from my own experience that when you open up to God in prayer He will not ignore you in your pain. I say pain, because being ashamed, and being your own worst accuser are such common aspects of this sort of struggle. They certainly were for me. The struggle with sin is common to all of us, though our sins may vary. Don't give in to the enemy's lies that you are beyond help.

So, may the God of Light bring you to holiness and peace. God Bless you Katheren.

PS I stumbled across your plea for prayer in the middle of the night (UK time) and had to register to respond - hence the delay.
 
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katheren

Member
#20
Nov 13, 2021
89
50
18
#20
thank you so much and yes it was hard for me to say what i said there
 
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