Spanking

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
Hjulle51 said:
Is it still common to spank? here in Norway is not allowed anymore
Click to expand...

I haven't seen it in years. I think it is more common to restrict a child by depriving them of something they enjoy or curfews/time out etc. I'm not a parent and unless something all of a sudden changes, I probably won't do that. I think rewarding or restricting is a highly efficient means of encouragement/discipline.

I'm not saying pain as a punishment isn't effective...just that it feels like a sticky topic.
 
  • Like
Reactions: throughfaith and Hjulle51
a spanking new spanking thread?

frankly, I would think too many parents would engage in letting steam off in the process of their meting out justice

spare the rod has been taken too literally. there are many ways to correct a child and the emphasis is actually on correction and not allowing your child to do whatever they want

a person spanking a child is not necessarily a god-fearing individual. I am positive some just 'get even' or 'show who the boss is' with corporal punishment

a cooling off period should be advised and not an arm swinging rendition of 'well you asked for it'
 
Yes @lenna ...too often it seems like a vent for a parents anger/frustration.

I've heard people view it as such...basically when the child directly disobeys and it's a situation when danger is present. Like don't walk out in the street and they test you there. Nope. Some things need to be clearly known immediately and firmly. Other things I feel like giving them time to process and work through why they are in error is fine.

A teacher at my school had a policy that you may ask why you are being told to do a particular thing but ONLY after you have done the thing required of you. The street example with a car coming is also what he used. Children do want to know why as they are themselves wrestling with their own flesh and while I think that helping them process through understanding/respecting parental decisions is important. It is also important that they are not used to them basically being the King/Queen and having a parent as their sort of advisor/guardian "if" they agree. They are princes and princesses. The PARENTS are the King/Queen.

With obvious modifiers being involved if the said King/Queen is a tyrant and is domineering vs having dominion/stewardship with a child. That's a difficult discussion and mostly off topic so I digress.
 
  • Like
Reactions: lenna
Mii said:
Yes @lenna ...too often it seems like a vent for a parents anger/frustration.

I've heard people view it as such...basically when the child directly disobeys and it's a situation when danger is present. Like don't walk out in the street and they test you there. Nope. Some things need to be clearly known immediately and firmly. Other things I feel like giving them time to process and work through why they are in error is fine.

A teacher at my school had a policy that you may ask why you are being told to do a particular thing but ONLY after you have done the thing required of you. The street example with a car coming is also what he used. Children do want to know why as they are themselves wrestling with their own flesh and while I think that helping them process through understanding/respecting parental decisions is important. It is also important that they are not used to them basically being the King/Queen and having a parent as their sort of advisor/guardian "if" they agree. They are princes and princesses. The PARENTS are the King/Queen.

With obvious modifiers being involved if the said King/Queen is a tyrant and is domineering vs having dominion/stewardship with a child. That's a difficult discussion and mostly off topic so I digress.
Click to expand...


sounds like the teacher had a reasonable grip with regards to how to handle things with children

my own dad would always explain things to me and that worked best. I learned I could trust him and he would listen to me and not just shut me down and punish me. my mother was a different story though. an aunt came to the house when she was in one of her punishment sessions and told her to stop and said you had better not do that again. she had locked me in a cupboard for some minor infraction. my aunt let me out. there were other such instances where someone stepped in and made her back off. the interesting thing though, is that she treated my brother like little lord of the manor

to this day, and not just from this one 'incident' I am actually somewhat claustrophobic
 
I think it is normal to a certain age but the problem as several others have stated is that parents can unleashed their anger in this moment sometimes without even meaning to being a parent is by no means easy and all that pent up stress agitation and anger can be a huge factor in this matter.

People punch walls or other objects to release anger I have even tried this on my garage door before luckily it is not enough to actually do to much damage but I did feel better afterwards however this is also scientific making fierce contact with anything releases the anger so it is no surprise that parents do this when spanking especially if they do it when the kids are older and much more lets say open in their words and ways.

Honestly though I find it kind of wierd to spank your kid when they get at a certain age
 
Our eldest son, we didn't really need to spank, he's a couple but as a toddler we gave him altermadums that he could understand and he usually chose the best for himself that worked for all of us. Our second child would not have that at all and spanking was the only correction that worked with him. That was only for a season, we can now reason things out with both of them quite well, they're both such beautiful boys.
Our third.. Well he's only 6 months so time is yet to tell lol
I take no gratification from spanking, it hurts me as much as them but if it's required, it's required. And it always came with an explanation of why after the tears and a hug if they wanted.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Blain
breno785au said:
Our eldest son, we didn't really need to spank, he's a couple but as a toddler we gave him altermadums that he could understand and he usually chose the best for himself that worked for all of us. Our second child would not have that at all and spanking was the only correction that worked with him. That was only for a season, we can now reason things out with both of them quite well, they're both such beautiful boys.
Our third.. Well he's only 6 months so time is yet to tell lol
I take no gratification from spanking, it hurts me as much as them but if it's required, it's required. And it always came with an explanation of why after the tears and a hug if they wanted.
Click to expand...
I remember when I was young I was spanked and my mom was like this hurts me more than it hurts you and I was are you kidding me!?
It does seem to be efficent when they are young though but oh man the groundings those were killer

So you have a six month old? do you have picture I adore babies so adorable like little kitty cats
 
  • Like
Reactions: breno785au
Blain said:
I remember when I was young I was spanked and my mom was like this hurts me more than it hurts you and I was are you kidding me!?
It does seem to be efficent when they are young though but oh man the groundings those were killer

So you have a six month old? do you have picture I adore babies so adorable like little kitty cats
Click to expand...
Lol there you go, little Micah.. Pretty hard working from home at times with such asking for your attention hehe
20201102_111824_compress92.jpg
 
  • Like
Reactions: mar09
Blain said:
People punch walls or other objects to release anger I have even tried this on my garage door before luckily it is not enough to actually do to much damage
Click to expand...

I often vent by saying nawty words. More often than not, I turn around and see that Amelia has been watching and listening to me. She will have the most disappointed and disgusted look on her face. (Amelia is my cat).
 
lenna said:
sounds like the teacher had a reasonable grip with regards to how to handle things with children

my own dad would always explain things to me and that worked best. I learned I could trust him and he would listen to me and not just shut me down and punish me. my mother was a different story though. an aunt came to the house when she was in one of her punishment sessions and told her to stop and said you had better not do that again. she had locked me in a cupboard for some minor infraction. my aunt let me out. there were other such instances where someone stepped in and made her back off. the interesting thing though, is that she treated my brother like little lord of the manor

to this day, and not just from this one 'incident' I am actually somewhat claustrophobic
Click to expand...
:(

These reactions just aren't expressive enough sometimes, alas.


I also experienced something quite serious and dangerous. I think the wounds are healed but the scars may remain. I don't think scars are a bad thing necessarily because Jesus had them when he appeared after his death but they do represent a deep hurt and connection with other people going through the same things that I didn't ask for...something that I've seen the Lord work in me being able to make a connection and give someone a break and sort of "see" them because I can see what they are struggling with and how rough it can be because I was on the receiving end.

Oh also, my aunts also helped me out at least once to blunt the "overstepping".

I'm not quite ready to talk about it yet I don't think but I did want to let you know I've gone through something similar. Things can take on a sinister depth in child rearing and since most people I know don't experience this, it's hard to talk about. I think parenting is a battle every day and we need to be quite vigilant against overstepping boundaries. Parents aren't God to children. Let HIM mete out severe and deep correction. That's none of our business, unless he involves us.

If parents are Kings/Queens. They aren't God and they are STILL subject to the King of Kings and should act accordingly. That means anything that looks anything like "hell" as a punishment I believe is outside our authority and is error.
 
Blain said:
I remember when I was young I was spanked and my mom was like this hurts me more than it hurts you and I was are you kidding me!?
Click to expand...

Yeah the same was said to me. At the time I was like "Ok, sure. When I'm a parent I'll remember to see if this is true. Since obviously I can't call your bluff at present". Not calling them a liar but at the same time, it's hard to believe. Legitimately what I thought, there's no way and still it doesn't make sense to me how it would hurt if they need it and you feel in your spirit that it is responsible. But...I could be proven wrong there and I've had a moment or two like that where I feel like it's the Lord saying "see...they weren't wrong...amazing right. You can't know until you're there."

It was also my mother pretty sure, or my step-father.
 
oyster67 said:
I often vent by saying nawty words. More often than not, I turn around and see that Amelia has been watching and listening to me. She will have the most disappointed and disgusted look on her face. (Amelia is my cat).
Click to expand...
:LOL: You know you messed up when your own pet judges you
 
  • Like
Reactions: oyster67 and Mii
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top Bottom
Back