Aw, I'm really sorry to hear you're going through hard times, Up. With everything going on in the world today, it's pushing everyone to the brink and beyond.
It was sweet of you to offer an apology -- that's a very rare find these days -- but we all understand having bad days. I hope you'll feel free to come here and maybe tell us about it when you're going through hard times -- we have several "share whatever's on your mind" threads here, such as BBG's Chat Thread, Streams of Consciousness (an oldie but goodie, just like us!)
, and tourist's Midnight Confessions thread.
Feel free to PM if you need to talk.