I’m single and not really digging it.

[Aerials1978]

I have been single for about 4 months now and I don’t really care for it. Some people seem to rally enjoy it, but not I. When I go out I see couples holding hands, laughing, even arguing, and I just feel a deep sadness for not having that anymore. Sitting by myself in Church is even awkward.

Maybe this is just part of the process I say to myself, but I know that’s not the truth for me. I really yearn for engagement, bonding, and friendship. All praise to the Lord for sustaining me through all of this. I know where I would be if not for His intervention.

God knows that I am person not meant to be alone. It’s not good for me. I pray that one day I met someone I can share my faith, love, laughter, joy, sorrow, hurt, and tears with. I know it will come because I trust Jesus. He will bring me a companion. I just need to be patient, although it’s hard to do.

 

[zeroturbulence]

Sorry you are feeling that way. I used to feel the same until I realized from others how difficult it can be to be in a relationship. In fact, I don't even feel like I'm missing out anymore. Just look at the divorce rate. Some people have to deal with abuse or neglect or infidelity from their partner and some have partners that are just difficult to get along with. They might be demanding or narcissistic or manipulative. Or they just argue over money or responsibility and tempers flare, people get hurt, etc.. I've been told more than once by married men that I was smart to not get married.

 

[Aerials1978]

Sorry you are feeling that way. I used to feel the same until I realized from others how difficult it can be to be in a relationship. In fact, I don't even feel like I'm missing out anymore. Just look at the divorce rate. Some people have to deal with abuse or neglect or infidelity from their partner and some have partners that are just difficult to get along with. They might be demanding or narcissistic or manipulative. Or they just argue over money or responsibility and tempers flare, people get hurt, etc.. I've been told more than once by married men that I was smart to not get married.

For some men, not being married is a good choice for them. I have a friend that is one of them. I use to the think there was a burned with marriage, and to a point there was. It’s wasn’t until mine dissolved that I realized how important that union was. This of course is for me.

 

[Belka]

Hang in there, brother... Some days (even seasons) are more difficult than others, but in the end we need to take care of our relationship with the Lord first (I know, it's said so often, it becomes redundant... but it's true)... because when we are filled with Him, that longing for a mate becomes very light... sometimes it even vanishes, at least for a while!

It's a bit like the waves of the sea, isn't it? Comes and goes... Sometimes it's all good and peachy and YAY! The Lord is enough! And then other times, it's like this deep longing and feels soul-crushing... Especially if you've been in a long-term relationship/marriage before, and you know what it's like to have someone to hold and to talk to, and to share life with. Sigh.

I feel you! You're not alone!

And although there's wisdom in saying that "it's good to be single too", because there are fewer problems and cares... still, some of us just long for a companion in life and it can be rough not to have that : (

Sometimes I get a little scared when I read of other people's stories, how they've been waiting for 15, 20 years, trusting in God... and nothing... Wow! I too, trust in the Lord for a spouse, and I do believe with all my heart it'll happen for me, but the waiting can get a little rough at times, and there's lots of reasons to "lose hope" at times...

But! Regardless of what happens... The Lord is pleased when we have faith in HIM and in HIS power, so let us keep trusting in Him and thanking Him for the future blessing! And for our current blessings! Because He knows us best and knows what's best for us in every moment...

Praying for you! You are not alone : )

 

[KellysJoy]

I have been single for about 4 months now and I don’t really care for it. Some people seem to rally enjoy it, but not I. When I go out I see couples holding hands, laughing, even arguing, and I just feel a deep sadness for not having that anymore. Sitting by myself in Church is even awkward.

Maybe this is just part of the process I say to myself, but I know that’s not the truth for me. I really yearn for engagement, bonding, and friendship. All praise to the Lord for sustaining me through all of this. I know where I would be if not for His intervention.

God knows that I am person not meant to be alone. It’s not good for me. I pray that one day I met someone I can share my faith, love, laughter, joy, sorrow, hurt, and tears with. I know it will come because I trust Jesus. He will bring me a companion. I just need to be patient, although it’s hard to do.

As someone who has been on both sides of the issue, each poses its own set of challenges. In either case, I have discovered that no matter what, I am never alone. God is with me at all times. He gave me the strength to face all the challenges that have been in my life so far, and he will continue to do so as long as I have faith that he will do so. My mantra has become " FAITH OVER FEAR ". I will not say it is easy, because anything worth having is worth working for. I will say that it is worth it.

 

[Aerials1978]

As someone who has been on both sides of the issue, each poses its own set of challenges. In either case, I have discovered that no matter what, I am never alone. God is with me at all times. He gave me the strength to face all the challenges that have been in my life so far, and he will continue to do so as long as I have faith that he will do so. My mantra has become " FAITH OVER FEAR ". I will not say it is easy, because anything worth having is worth working for. I will say that it is worth it.

Surly I’m not alone. He who is in me....
And your absolutely correct, anything worth having is worth fight for. I wasn’t the husband the Lord called me to be. He is cleaning out my temple so that when I do marry again, I will be the man God has called me to be!

 

[Aerials1978]

Hang in there, brother... Some days (even seasons) are more difficult than others, but in the end we need to take care of our relationship with the Lord first (I know, it's said so often, it becomes redundant... but it's true)... because when we are filled with Him, that longing for a mate becomes very light... sometimes it even vanishes, at least for a while!

It's a bit like the waves of the sea, isn't it? Comes and goes... Sometimes it's all good and peachy and YAY! The Lord is enough! And then other times, it's like this deep longing and feels soul-crushing... Especially if you've been in a long-term relationship/marriage before, and you know what it's like to have someone to hold and to talk to, and to share life with. Sigh.

I feel you! You're not alone!

And although there's wisdom in saying that "it's good to be single too", because there are fewer problems and cares... still, some of us just long for a companion in life and it can be rough not to have that : (

Sometimes I get a little scared when I read of other people's stories, how they've been waiting for 15, 20 years, trusting in God... and nothing... Wow! I too, trust in the Lord for a spouse, and I do believe with all my heart it'll happen for me, but the waiting can get a little rough at times, and there's lots of reasons to "lose hope" at times...

But! Regardless of what happens... The Lord is pleased when we have faith in HIM and in HIS power, so let us keep trusting in Him and thanking Him for the future blessing! And for our current blessings! Because He knows us best and knows what's best for us in every moment...

Praying for you! You are not alone : )

Thank you! May the Lord of Hosts always be with you as well!

 

[KellysJoy]

Surly I’m not alone. He who is in me....
And your absolutely correct, anything worth having is worth fight for. I wasn’t the husband the Lord called me to be. He is cleaning out my temple so that when I do marry again, I will be the man God has called me to be!

Things work in his time, not ours. I have found, from personal experience, it is easy to turn things over to God. The hard part is leaving it there in his hands. We want things to be done when we want them, not necessarily when he does.

 

[JustEli]

I waited 1.5 years before dating after my marriage went down the drain. Now I am fully back on track.
Making poor decisions and letting life slip by.

 

[KellysJoy]

It's been about 6 years since mine became officially over. I haven't been on a date since. I've been asked out, but not by someone I would want to spend the rest of my life with. I know God wants me to be with someone who will treat me with respect, not someone who will make me afraid.

 

[Aerials1978]

I waited 1.5 years before dating after my marriage went down the drain. Now I am fully back on track.
Making poor decisions and letting life slip by.

Don’t give up Brother! There were many times in my life I knew it was slipping away. Jesus in his mercy had to stripe me of comfort. He brought me out of the grave. He will continue to do so for you when you call on his name. We are all gracefully broken.

 

[Aerials1978]

It's been about 6 years since mine became officially over. I haven't been on a date since. I've been asked out, but not by someone I would want to spend the rest of my life with. I know God wants me to be with someone who will treat me with respect, not someone who will make me afraid.

As you stated before, we just need to wait on his timing. Jesus what’s me to be in His love, but He also working on my heart to love others. Even people I don’t know. I’m being molded by the Potters Hands. I will let the Creator do what He does best!

 

[kinda]

I have been single for about 4 months now and I don’t really care for it. Some people seem to rally enjoy it, but not I. When I go out I see couples holding hands, laughing, even arguing, and I just feel a deep sadness for not having that anymore. Sitting by myself in Church is even awkward.

Maybe this is just part of the process I say to myself, but I know that’s not the truth for me. I really yearn for engagement, bonding, and friendship. All praise to the Lord for sustaining me through all of this. I know where I would be if not for His intervention.

God knows that I am person not meant to be alone. It’s not good for me. I pray that one day I met someone I can share my faith, love, laughter, joy, sorrow, hurt, and tears with. I know it will come because I trust Jesus. He will bring me a companion. I just need to be patient, although it’s hard to do.

Well, it sounds like you just got a divorce, so marriage wasn't exactly groovy either. Life is difficult no matter what style of music you listen to. Sorry to hear about your separation, it's o.k. to seek professional help in times like these. Job is a good read when you have a sorrowful heart.

Personally, I think God gave us music, to give us hope that there is a God. Nothing really satisfies like a song that hits all the right heart strings. Psalms is one the longest books in the Bible for a reason.

Here is a video that I watched, that gave me hope in trying times. I look back at my trying times over years past and laugh now. Our God is an Awesome God!

 

[Nehemiah6]

I just need to be patient, although it’s hard to do.

Patience is undoubtedly a great virtue, but it does not replace positive action. God expects us to do our part while He does His part. Study Genesis 24.

But thou shalt go unto my country, and to my kindred, and take a wife unto my son Isaac.

 

[KellysJoy]

The molding is something that never stops. When one area of our lives gets to where he wants it, he starts somewhere else. There are times when he has to make a return trip to the first area because we start slipping. I am of the belief, that even though I make mistakes, if I can learn from it, then it was worth screwing up. I can always use it later' for his will, to help someone else. I would have preferred not to have screwed up in the first place, because it does cause issues in other areas of my life.

Repenting is something that I don't take for granted. True repenting is a lot of hard work, and can lead to a lot of changes in a person's life. For me, overcoming fear has been my greatest challenge.

 

[Aerials1978]

Well, it sounds like you just got a divorce, so marriage wasn't exactly groovy either. Life is difficult no matter what style of music you listen to. Sorry to hear about your separation, it's o.k. to seek professional help in times like these. Job is a good read when you have a sorrowful heart.

Personally, I think God gave us music, to give us hope that there is a God. Nothing really satisfies like a song that hits all the right heart strings. Psalms is one the longest books in the Bible for a reason.

Here is a video that I watched, that gave me hope in trying times. I look back at my trying times over years past and laugh now. Our God is an Awesome God!

I agree that music is very uplifting. Always has been for me. Thank you for sharing the video. One song that really speaks to “Entering the New World” is posted below. I listen multiple times a day.

 

[SUNDOWNSAM]

Well, it sounds like you just got a divorce, so marriage wasn't exactly groovy either. Life is difficult no matter what style of music you listen to. Sorry to hear about your separation, it's o.k. to seek professional help in times like these. Job is a good read when you have a sorrowful heart.

Personally, I think God gave us music, to give us hope that there is a God. Nothing really satisfies like a song that hits all the right heart strings. Psalms is one the longest books in the Bible for a reason.

Here is a video that I watched, that gave me hope in trying times. I look back at my trying times over years past and laugh now. Our God is an Awesome God!

--------------------------------
Let me share this with you, I was involved in a relationship for over 28 years, the last 5 years of that relationship told me it was the end though I tried to save it. She started to hang out with single and divorced women who were not in a rush to go home they had no husband to go to. I warned her about it that it will rub on to be single again and she said it won't, that was why the last 5 years things started to change. When I left, I told her you got what you wanted (her eyes opened widely) and I am leaving with what I did not want.

I stayed single for over 5 years, I met a beautiful Brazilian woman, we dated as friends and we kept it that way, a kiss on the cheek was all she got from me(a hello and a bye). I was not ready to get involved in a relationship, though we became good friends. I met a Russian woman, God used her in my life and we got married (first marriage), two years just talking to her getting to know who she was and we married, I will enter my 7 year into this marriage this year, but I waited 2 years before that decision, I wanted to make sure.

My advice to you, wait patiently and do a lot of praying for God to strengthen you, 5 years I was alone and yes, it is lonely when is why I will tell you make a friend with someone, but let them know just friends and if you fall in love right away then you are not thinking.

Hope for the above you get encourage.

 

[Aerials1978]

--------------------------------
Let me share this with you, I was involved in a relationship for over 28 years, the last 5 years of that relationship told me it was the end though I tried to save it. She started to hang out with single and divorced women who were not in a rush to go home they had no husband to go to. I warned her about it that it will rub on to be single again and she said it won't, that was why the last 5 years things started to change. When I left, I told her you got what you wanted (her eyes opened widely) and I am leaving with what I did not want.

I stayed single for over 5 years, I met a beautiful Brazilian woman, we dated as friends and we kept it that way, a kiss on the cheek was all she got from me(a hello and a bye). I was not ready to get involved in a relationship, though we became good friends. I met a Russian woman, God used her in my life and we got married (first marriage), two years just talking to her getting to know who she was and we married, I will enter my 7 year into this marriage this year, but I waited 2 years before that decision, I wanted to make sure.

My advice to you, wait patiently and do a lot of praying for God to strengthen you, 5 years I was alone and yes, it is lonely when is why I will tell you make a friend with someone, but let them know just friends and if you fall in love right away then you are not thinking.

Hope for the above you get encourage.

I always appreciate and respect the knowledge experienced people give. And you’re absolutely correct. I will wait and have prayed earnestly. Even as a younger man I also wanted a wife. I was not a good steward when I had it. By Lords leading and grace that won’t happen again.

 

[Lynx]

And one who has been single 41 years and counting, I just have to say one thing...

When you're single you don't have to share! You don't have to share the TV remote, the donuts are all yours, nobody is picking all the shrimp out of the gumbo and all her favorites out of the mixed nuts jar.

Being single totally rocks!

 

[Aerials1978]

And one who has been single 41 years and counting, I just have to say one thing...

When you're single you don't have to share! You don't have to share the TV remote, the donuts are all yours, nobody is picking all the shrimp out of the gumbo and all her favorites out of the mixed nuts jar.

Being single totally rocks!

I admire your optimism