Do you believe it's God's will that you just lead and disregard if your family doesn't follow?

[cyph2cor517]

For instance, my wife and helping around the house, or the money she spends. But I fall short in this myself. It seems like if I just go the extra mile, and do in my own life everything I'm complaining inside about with regard to my wife (without worrying about whether or not she is doing the same), the Lord will intervene and guide her in the same direction.
Same thing with my daughter. She doesn't keep her room tidy. I don't keep my own house tidy! But it seems like if I go above and beyond, and put the effort into doing it myself, the Lord will honor that.
I think if you're a husband or dad and you want to execute that authority, then you can't really expect the Lord's help if you're being hypocritical. But if you know that you're putting your all into it, and then you go to your wife and your daughter, and say "This is how it needs to be done", then the Lord will actually help you out.
It would help silence a lot of complaining within if I could work this out. I do pray about it often but I think there's some action that needs to be involved on my part.

 

[Roughsoul1991]

For instance, my wife and helping around the house, or the money she spends. But I fall short in this myself. It seems like if I just go the extra mile, and do in my own life everything I'm complaining inside about with regard to my wife (without worrying about whether or not she is doing the same), the Lord will intervene and guide her in the same direction.
Same thing with my daughter. She doesn't keep her room tidy. I don't keep my own house tidy! But it seems like if I go above and beyond, and put the effort into doing it myself, the Lord will honor that.
I think if you're a husband or dad and you want to execute that authority, then you can't really expect the Lord's help if you're being hypocritical. But if you know that you're putting your all into it, and then you go to your wife and your daughter, and say "This is how it needs to be done", then the Lord will actually help you out.
It would help silence a lot of complaining within if I could work this out. I do pray about it often but I think there's some action that needs to be involved on my part.

It is the age old response to lead by example. I know I remember when I was in high school my room was a wreck but my parents also understood to a degree I was very very active in NJROTC and after school activities including weekends. Her energy or what she cares about may be elsewhere. Not saying it is wrong to ask her to clean the room or your spouse to do something but I have learned sometimes we must take into consideration of who they are, their strong and weak areas of their life, and their perspective. It could cause you to think completely different about the situation.

Leading by example isnt going to force anyone to follow. But it sure will set the example for what you expect.

 

[Subhumanoidal]

For instance, my wife and helping around the house, or the money she spends. But I fall short in this myself. It seems like if I just go the extra mile, and do in my own life everything I'm complaining inside about with regard to my wife (without worrying about whether or not she is doing the same), the Lord will intervene and guide her in the same direction.
Same thing with my daughter. She doesn't keep her room tidy. I don't keep my own house tidy! But it seems like if I go above and beyond, and put the effort into doing it myself, the Lord will honor that.
I think if you're a husband or dad and you want to execute that authority, then you can't really expect the Lord's help if you're being hypocritical. But if you know that you're putting your all into it, and then you go to your wife and your daughter, and say "This is how it needs to be done", then the Lord will actually help you out.
It would help silence a lot of complaining within if I could work this out. I do pray about it often but I think there's some action that needs to be involved on my part.

But to assume they will automatically follow is false. Guidance isn't force. God won't force them to do the same as you. So even if He guides them, that doesn't mean they'll listen.
And not all people have the same personality and standards. Or priorities.
Especially when a standard had previously been set, simply changing that standard does not mean it's easy for others to do. The longer people act a certain way, the longer it takes to change those behaviors.
You can lead by example and there's a chance they may follow, but not a guarantee. So you need to be prepared. Assuming you can even change your own habits.

 

[Aerials1978]

For instance, my wife and helping around the house, or the money she spends. But I fall short in this myself. It seems like if I just go the extra mile, and do in my own life everything I'm complaining inside about with regard to my wife (without worrying about whether or not she is doing the same), the Lord will intervene and guide her in the same direction.
Same thing with my daughter. She doesn't keep her room tidy. I don't keep my own house tidy! But it seems like if I go above and beyond, and put the effort into doing it myself, the Lord will honor that.
I think if you're a husband or dad and you want to execute that authority, then you can't really expect the Lord's help if you're being hypocritical. But if you know that you're putting your all into it, and then you go to your wife and your daughter, and say "This is how it needs to be done", then the Lord will actually help you out.
It would help silence a lot of complaining within if I could work this out. I do pray about it often but I think there's some action that needs to be involved on my part.

Fellowship with family is not always easy. LOL. You’re doing right by praying first and foremost. Living your faith in front of them second. Loving with compassion( and at times with sternness) to them third. You will give glory to God. Keep fighting the good fight! You be amazed what the Lord does.

 

[GdaxBbb]

I can tell you 100% for sure that is not 100% the case. I’ve done all the above and beyond my significant other still does nothing. God is not going to force peoples will.

 

[Aerials1978]

I can tell you 100% for sure that is not 100% the case. I’ve done all the above and beyond my significant other still does nothing. God is not going to force peoples will.

Your right that God does not force someone’s will. Wondering when the Lords hand will move can be a time consuming event. Rest assured that it will and it may not come in the way we think. This verse has carried me through troubling times, but His promises are good and true.

 

[Deade]

Leading by example isnt going to force anyone to follow. But it sure will set the example for what you expect.

What a man sows, that he will reap. Walk the walk before you teach others. Amen.

 

[Lanolin]

well it depends on how you approach it. are you just telling someone what to do and. ot doing it yourself or showing them how?
If you want to teach a person how to keep house, budget and tidy then you got to make the effort and be willing to learn too, and take the time.
I dont think anyone learns how to do that by only copying someone else, or just being expected to do it if they got no clue, or no idea why its important.

so, housekeeping and budgeting. Do you have the tools and equipment? Do you have a budget drawn up and a logbook or some kind of spreadsheet to keep track? Is there a roster for the dishes? Or an agreement on who does what?

Tidying ones room. I think thats personal if its your own bedroom but there are benefits to being tidy and if one needs help theres always encouraging books like The magic of tidying up.
Its no good berating someone and saying you live like a pig clean it up! Thats doesnt DO anything to help anybody.
Make housework fun, put on some music, or give incentives.

Once you done a job of clearing up all the clutter then its half done, all the rest just needs organisng and sorting. Labels are good so that nothing is ever a mess again.

I could tell you horror stories abot hoarders as a cautionary tale.

 

[mar09]

I can tell you 100% for sure that is not 100% the case. I’ve done all the above and beyond my significant other still does nothing. God is not going to force peoples will.

Hi gdax... You sound just like my hubby. Not that his significant other is doing nothing. Many times I say just because we are different, and do some things differently, means that the other is wrong. He (and you) may have certain expectations abt certain things, but try as I would, I could not seem to achieve some things he's been expecting for years! I happened to have read Disciplines of a Godly Wife before, and the writer said its been 37 yrs, but her hubby was still praying for her to be disciplined and organized (wc she learned he was praying for early on in their marriage=). But i'm sure she had many other good, Godly traits she was sharing in her book.

While I am quite at home outside the house, climbing a tree or roof when possible to chop off branches, for example, our sons never seemed to catch on or be interested in doing the same. When my husband asked one to clean the pavement and grass that grew anywhere, son did before. But after hubby stopped asking to do those things, our son stopped as well. Perhaps he got tired while doing good (just as I do when I fold clothing and sort/pile them asking the guys to get theirs. Then they pull any wc way and I really am tired to either tell them or do the job again!). The mess remains a few days until someone (normally me) fixes them up again=).

To cyph, perhaps showing how u want things done once in a while will help. I heard (on Christian radio or read somewhere?) that God expects us to be Godly parents, but making our children (and spouse) Godly is His job. Hope this helps.

 

[GdaxBbb]

Hi gdax... You sound just like my hubby. Not that his significant other is doing nothing. Many times I say just because we are different, and do some things differently, means that the other is wrong. He (and you) may have certain expectations abt certain things, but try as I would, I could not seem to achieve some things he's been expecting for years! I happened to have read Disciplines of a Godly Wife before, and the writer said its been 37 yrs, but her hubby was still praying for her to be disciplined and organized (wc she learned he was praying for early on in their marriage=). But i'm sure she had many other good, Godly traits she was sharing in her book.

While I am quite at home outside the house, climbing a tree or roof when possible to chop off branches, for example, our sons never seemed to catch on or be interested in doing the same. When my husband asked one to clean the pavement and grass that grew anywhere, son did before. But after hubby stopped asking to do those things, our son stopped as well. Perhaps he got tired while doing good (just as I do when I fold clothing and sort/pile them asking the guys to get theirs. Then they pull any wc way and I really am tired to either tell them or do the job again!). The mess remains a few days until someone (normally me) fixes them up again=).

To cyph, perhaps showing how u want things done once in a while will help. I heard (on Christian radio or read somewhere?) that God expects us to be Godly parents, but making our children (and spouse) Godly is His job. Hope this helps.

At least you do stuff haha, but you prove the point exactly as soon as you anyone stops asking nobody does anything. It’s being courteous to others, some people have it some don’t.