Very fearful friend

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
T

TheIndianGirl

Guest
#1
#1
I have a fearful Christian friend (very conservative on social issues, and reads Bible in literal terms) who is a pastor's daughter. She is the most prayerful Christian I know (deep faith, prays every meal, etc.), however she is fearful she will not go to heaven if she does not answer God's call to the fullest. She is still figuring out God's call for her life. She told me a story of a pastor who did not speak the full truth/stay true to the call and once he retired, he had a dream which shows that God is not happy with him. The man trembled at this dream and sought forgiveness, and began to warn others. I think my friend is being too hard on herself, but I'm also scared by this story. The thing is, she is fearful and wants to be a missionary but she is getting her PhD in a completely unrelated field. So, I'm not sure exactly how fearful she is. I am also bit confused why some Christians believe simple faith is enough, but for others they see themselves as failures if they do not fulfill God's call which is epic/Moses level where it seems faith alone is not enough. Not really asking a question here, but please feel free to post your thoughts.
 
Demi777

Demi777

Senior Member
#2
Oct 13, 2014
6,889
1,958
113
Germany
#2
She needs to realise that God doesnt want religious robots. He wants a relationship with us. Shes givin the enemy waay too much power through fear.
God doesnt want this kind of life for us.
 
Bingo

Bingo

Well-known member
#3
Feb 9, 2019
9,194
4,750
113
#3
"The Holy Spirit and Spiritual faith, one has it, or not. And, having Spiritual harmony
with worldly things shall be considered to be essential, within ones own self."
~Thought to ponder~
- Copy - Copy - Copy (7) - Copy - Copy - Copy - Copy - Copy.jpg Friendly.png
 
zeroturbulence

zeroturbulence

Senior Member
#4
Aug 2, 2009
24,644
4,305
113
#4
TheIndianGirl said:
I have a fearful Christian friend (very conservative on social issues, and reads Bible in literal terms) who is a pastor's daughter. She is the most prayerful Christian I know (deep faith, prays every meal, etc.), however she is fearful she will not go to heaven if she does not answer God's call to the fullest. She is still figuring out God's call for her life. She told me a story of a pastor who did not speak the full truth/stay true to the call and once he retired, he had a dream which shows that God is not happy with him. The man trembled at this dream and sought forgiveness, and began to warn others. I think my friend is being too hard on herself, but I'm also scared by this story. The thing is, she is fearful and wants to be a missionary but she is getting her PhD in a completely unrelated field. So, I'm not sure exactly how fearful she is. I am also bit confused why some Christians believe simple faith is enough, but for others they see themselves as failures if they do not fulfill God's call which is epic/Moses level where it seems faith alone is not enough. Not really asking a question here, but please feel free to post your thoughts.
Click to expand...
God is a father who loves his children very much. Would a loving father send their children to hell because they weren't perfect? Only a tyraannical, cold-hearted father would do that. It would be like an earthly father sending his child to a far off prison to be tortured for eternity because he/she wasn't the perfect child. Hopefully this will make some sense to her.
 
Moses_Young

Moses_Young

Well-known member
#5
Sep 15, 2019
9,975
5,532
113
#5
TheIndianGirl said:
I have a fearful Christian friend (very conservative on social issues, and reads Bible in literal terms) who is a pastor's daughter. She is the most prayerful Christian I know (deep faith, prays every meal, etc.), however she is fearful she will not go to heaven if she does not answer God's call to the fullest. She is still figuring out God's call for her life. She told me a story of a pastor who did not speak the full truth/stay true to the call and once he retired, he had a dream which shows that God is not happy with him. The man trembled at this dream and sought forgiveness, and began to warn others. I think my friend is being too hard on herself, but I'm also scared by this story. The thing is, she is fearful and wants to be a missionary but she is getting her PhD in a completely unrelated field. So, I'm not sure exactly how fearful she is. I am also bit confused why some Christians believe simple faith is enough, but for others they see themselves as failures if they do not fulfill God's call which is epic/Moses level where it seems faith alone is not enough. Not really asking a question here, but please feel free to post your thoughts.
Click to expand...
I would suggest (but I do not know) that your friend is right to be fearful, because she is relying on her works to save her (see text in red). These will not save her, and indeed, if she relies on them, will damn her. We are saved through Christ alone.

Matthew 7:21-23 Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven.
Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in thy name? and in thy name have cast out devils? and in thy name done many wonderful works?
And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity.

John 6:28-29 Then said they unto him, What shall we do, that we might work the works of God?
29 Jesus answered and said unto them, This is the work of God, that ye believe on him whom he hath sent.

Let me repeat - we are saved through Christ's work alone. It is well to work our hardest in thankfulness for Christ's saving work on the cross for us, but we must always be assured this plays no part in our salvation, because we absolutely cannot love the Lord our God with all our heart, with all our mind, with all our strength, and with all our soul, neither can we even love our neighbours as ourselves.
 
StreetPreacher

StreetPreacher

Member
#6
Oct 12, 2019
50
41
18
#6
I think some or most of these fears are a result of her social, cultural, and theological up-bringing and influences. That being said, He who began a good work in her is faithful to complete it (phil 1:6) and perfect love cast out fear ( 1john 4:18)
 
3

3angelsmsg

Guest
#7
#7
It sounds that your friend is really serious about her relationship with the Lord and takes the call of God seriously to 'Go preach and teach' which is good thing and she is willing to fulfill the good commission.

It is understandable to be fearful of the uncertainty of her future and where God wants her to be.

She just has to grow in trust of God and get better understanding of the character of God.

May she grow in the love of Christ
 
Butterflyyy

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
#8
Oct 31, 2019
1,610
1,318
113
#8
TheIndianGirl said:
I have a fearful Christian friend (very conservative on social issues, and reads Bible in literal terms) who is a pastor's daughter. She is the most prayerful Christian I know (deep faith, prays every meal, etc.), however she is fearful she will not go to heaven if she does not answer God's call to the fullest. She is still figuring out God's call for her life. She told me a story of a pastor who did not speak the full truth/stay true to the call and once he retired, he had a dream which shows that God is not happy with him. The man trembled at this dream and sought forgiveness, and began to warn others. I think my friend is being too hard on herself, but I'm also scared by this story. The thing is, she is fearful and wants to be a missionary but she is getting her PhD in a completely unrelated field. So, I'm not sure exactly how fearful she is. I am also bit confused why some Christians believe simple faith is enough, but for others they see themselves as failures if they do not fulfill God's call which is epic/Moses level where it seems faith alone is not enough. Not really asking a question here, but please feel free to post your thoughts.
Click to expand...
Is she Catholic?
 
T

TheIndianGirl

Guest
#9
#9
StreetPreacher said:
I think some or most of these fears are a result of her social, cultural, and theological up-bringing and influences. That being said, He who began a good work in her is faithful to complete it (phil 1:6) and perfect love cast out fear ( 1john 4:18)
Click to expand...
That's correct, my friend's father who is a pastor is very strict and also very fearful.
 
laughingheart

laughingheart

Senior Member
#11
Sep 21, 2016
1,709
1,669
113
#11
Maybe try a different perspective. Let her know that you are shocked at her arrogance and lack of humility. You will have her attention. Ask her why she believes she is more powerful than God and that Christ is a liar.
Ask her why she believes that salvation is dependent on her? One of the key lessons of the old testament is that we cannot fix the brokenness of sin by our actions. Our righteousness is a filthy rag (and not just any filthy rag. This example was used to bring home the point). What makes her think that, apart from Christ's sacrifice, we have any hope? Is his sacrifice only worth partial payment?
She needs to truly humble herself and accept the fullness of Christ's mercy. She is not such a sinner that he is incapable of covering all the sins of thought, intent and action. Has she messed up? Yes. Has she been forgiven for all the past and future? Yes. She either accepts it or rejects it.
Now this is very harsh speaking but it may require this level of rebuke to break the cycle of her self abuse. It is actually pride. She needs to see it for what it is. As Martin Luther discovered. It is by grace and grace alone by which I stand.
Blessings to you and freedom in Christ for her.
 
zeroturbulence

zeroturbulence

Senior Member
#12
Aug 2, 2009
24,644
4,305
113
#12
TheIndianGirl said:
That's correct, my friend's father who is a pastor is very strict and also very fearful.
Click to expand...
That is the root of the problem. Her father will have to answer to God for how he is misrepresenting Christ and causing his daughter to feel unworthy of God's love.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.