Awesome.. likewise. Care to share your testimony?
Absolutely. About 16 years ago I became a believer. I was red hot for God. Did everything that a new Believer was suppose to do. Life was grand. Blessing of a Wife and Children, a good home to live in.
As the years passed, I became like-warm in my walk. The burdens of the world and my old nature became appealing again. I went from luke-warm to all our wicked.
As fews month ago my Wife decided it was time leave me. I had been so wrong to her that her heart was actually harden. She left. I fell in despair.
One night I was alone and completely drunk. I wondered about my place for hours thinking, I don’t even know. What I do remember is having a loaded gun in my hand and I was walking about yelling at unclean sprits saying “ You finally got me. You finally destroyed me”
I remember sitting on my couch, rubbing the gun against the side of my head and finally ending up in my mouth with finger on the trigger. You know what bothers me the most was that I wasn’t scared. Either I was too intoxicated or didn’t care enough.
I passed out for the night. The next few days were hazy. I felt like a stranger in a strange land. People whom I have known were now like shadows passing by.
One day while I was sitting at my desk, I decided to listen to a sermon on divorce. The first video that popped up was one called “ Why God allows marriages to fail” The Man who did the video was passionate about his testimony. He was a Man that lost everything and was involved in a brutal divorce that lasted 5 years.
He message was that if we do indeed want to follow Christ we need deny ourselves and embrace and praise God for the pain that has come about. How can we truly be a follower if we had to never endure suffering or loss.
At the video I prayed and really thought what I heard. The next day as I was standing outside looking at the clouds I said “ Lord, God, Father! I give everything over to you. I don’t know what that will mean or be, but there is no other way. Take me for good or for bad and use me to your Glory!”
The next fews days I prayed, cried, repented of the sins I had committed to God and my family. Slowly, Gods grace and sprit descended upon me.
I walk with the Lord everyday now. The hurt and pain are still there, but God gives me comfort. I don’t know what my future holds, but I know I am in the Mighty Right Hand of Jesus. Whatever comes about, my thinking is now for eternity and His kingdom. It’s a hard concept to grasp for a finite being like myself.
Thank you for listening and pray for me. I will also pray for you!