Hey Everyone,
I found the answers in the first "Quirks" thread to be pretty interesting. I also felt sad that some people seem to believe, or have been made to believe, that their quirks make them unlovable or unacceptable to other people.
But I also couldn't help thinking about the fact that in order to have a relationship, not only would I have to be aware of my own quirks (to be able to explain them to someone else), but I would also have to learn an entirely new set of someone else's quirks and find a way to work around/compromise the two.
I have heard it said that one reason many older singles look for much-younger companions is because they believe a younger person's character/habits are more flexible and malleable. Supposedly, young people are not "set in their ways" like an older person is assumed to be.
How do you feel about this?
I used to think this was somewhat true, but now I tend to disagree. I was only more compromising when I was younger because I didn't know any better and didn't know how to express what I was really feeling. These days, I know a lot better as to why I react to certain things and have a better idea of what I can and cannot be flexible about. When I was younger, I would let things build up until I just seemingly exploded for no reason, which caught people off guard. Now I try to take the time to figure out WHY I feel the way I do and to EXPLAIN it to those around me in a (hopefully) much calmer manner.
How about the rest of you? You know your own quirks, so:
1. How much of your quirkiness is set in stone? How much could be changed? How much could be changed, but you just don't want to change it?
2. Just as you have your own list of things that can and can't be changed, how would you (or do you) adjust to someone else's list of quirks, especially the "unchangeables"?
3. Where is the line between, "This is me, I can't/won't change," and, "I can/will try to change/make sacrifices for the sake of another person"?
I'm not just thinking of romantic relationships, but also everyday relationships as well. I've lived with people I loved dearly but had extremely long lists of quirks, so although I know I can adjust to just about anything, I also know that if it goes too far or for too long, I will feel like I'm living in a prison and will fall into a deep despair.
The Bible talks about us serving one another.
But how are we able to take care of ourselves, and yet sacrifice our own quirks in the interest of serving others?
I found the answers in the first "Quirks" thread to be pretty interesting. I also felt sad that some people seem to believe, or have been made to believe, that their quirks make them unlovable or unacceptable to other people.
But I also couldn't help thinking about the fact that in order to have a relationship, not only would I have to be aware of my own quirks (to be able to explain them to someone else), but I would also have to learn an entirely new set of someone else's quirks and find a way to work around/compromise the two.
I have heard it said that one reason many older singles look for much-younger companions is because they believe a younger person's character/habits are more flexible and malleable. Supposedly, young people are not "set in their ways" like an older person is assumed to be.
How do you feel about this?
I used to think this was somewhat true, but now I tend to disagree. I was only more compromising when I was younger because I didn't know any better and didn't know how to express what I was really feeling. These days, I know a lot better as to why I react to certain things and have a better idea of what I can and cannot be flexible about. When I was younger, I would let things build up until I just seemingly exploded for no reason, which caught people off guard. Now I try to take the time to figure out WHY I feel the way I do and to EXPLAIN it to those around me in a (hopefully) much calmer manner.
How about the rest of you? You know your own quirks, so:
1. How much of your quirkiness is set in stone? How much could be changed? How much could be changed, but you just don't want to change it?
2. Just as you have your own list of things that can and can't be changed, how would you (or do you) adjust to someone else's list of quirks, especially the "unchangeables"?
3. Where is the line between, "This is me, I can't/won't change," and, "I can/will try to change/make sacrifices for the sake of another person"?
I'm not just thinking of romantic relationships, but also everyday relationships as well. I've lived with people I loved dearly but had extremely long lists of quirks, so although I know I can adjust to just about anything, I also know that if it goes too far or for too long, I will feel like I'm living in a prison and will fall into a deep despair.
The Bible talks about us serving one another.
But how are we able to take care of ourselves, and yet sacrifice our own quirks in the interest of serving others?
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