Are you happy?

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Going_Nowhere

Going_Nowhere

Well-known member
#1
Nov 10, 2019
1,729
945
113
#1
So....this is a simple and pretty straightforward question.


Are you happy with your life?


And if not, what would make you happy....if anything? Or what do you think is keeping you from being happy? I know some single people might say getting a boyfriend or girlfriend would make them happier. But other than the lack of romance in your life....what else would make you happier? More friends? A better job? Certain problems or obstacles in your life finally going away or being resolved? Please be specific if you don't mind. But if it's too personal or private, or you just don't feel like sharing, then that's fine too. :)
 
seoulsearch

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
#2
May 23, 2009
16,683
5,599
113
#2
Going_Nowhere said:
So....this is a simple and pretty straightforward question.


Are you happy with your life?


And if not, what would make you happy....if anything? Or what do you think is keeping you from being happy? I know some single people might say getting a boyfriend or girlfriend would make them happier. But other than the lack of romance in your life....what else would make you happier? More friends? A better job? Certain problems or obstacles in your life finally going away or being resolved? Please be specific if you don't mind. But if it's too personal or private, or you just don't feel like sharing, then that's fine too. :)
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This is a good question, GN, and definitely something that each of us ask ourselves.

To be honest, I'm not sure anymore.

I used to be like most singles in thinking that "FINDING THE ONE!" would ultimately make me happy, and while I'm certainly not against meeting him, if such a person exists, I've come to see life as being quite a bit more complicated than that.

In my time of singleness, I've tried to set goals for myself (in an effort, I suppose, to climb the ladder of happiness.) But EVERY time I met a goal, I would start to panic, because I would start to realize that if I didn't find another goal to replace it (and therefore distract my unhappiness,) I would start to feel anxious and depressed.

I used to think meeting my goals would make me happy. But it didn't (even though of course, there were some benefits.)

Lately, I have been asking God what it is I'm looking for, and if it's even obtainable in this life (as I know true happiness can't be met until we're with Him.)

However, I'm wondering exactly what He wants me to do in the meantime.

What about you, Going Nowhere?

What things do you think would make you happy, and why?
 
Lanolin

Lanolin

Well-known member
#3
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
#3
I think salvation for my family would up the happy scale. But otherwise am happy with my life.

which is a blessing because I have known both despair and euphoria. I would say to be stable is more important and then your emotions dont go to extremes. That comes from knowing God.

for singles I do think being its not good to be in a rotten job for too long. It does affect you..but if theres a situation you cant change know that God is cultivating your character through it. He does have work for us to do thats preordained for us. The key is getting on the right path
 
Tinkerbell725

Tinkerbell725

Senior Member
#4
Jul 19, 2014
4,216
1,179
113
Philippines Age 40
#4
If good health, contentment and gratefulness mean happiness, then I can say I am happy. With this mindset, I just look forward to little things in life that brightens my day and it prevents me from chasing the wind, which only brings frustrations.

Every day is a gift.
 
Going_Nowhere

Going_Nowhere

Well-known member
#5
Nov 10, 2019
1,729
945
113
#5
seoulsearch said:
What about you, Going Nowhere?

What things do you think would make you happy, and why?
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This is going to sound horrible, but I think....if I was the total opposite of the person that I am....I would be happy. I hate myself and there's just so much wrong with my life. I could go into details, but (and I hope you understand) I'd rather not. I feel like telling people who aren't happy one thing: Just be glad you're not me. Because that's honestly how I feel. I feel....highly unlucky....to say the least.
 
Lanolin

Lanolin

Well-known member
#6
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
#6
Going_Nowhere said:
This is going to sound horrible, but I think....if I was the total opposite of the person that I am....I would be happy. I hate myself and there's just so much wrong with my life. I could go into details, but (and I hope you understand) I'd rather not. I feel like telling people who aren't happy one thing: Just be glad you're not me. Because that's honestly how I feel. I feel....highly unlucky....to say the least.
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but arent you a child of God?
no matter what circumstances we are in, that wont change if youve been born again. And God can then work on getting you where he wants you to be...we are all a work in progress, in our souls but at the spirit level you are perfect. God loves you even if you dont feel that way. He does.
 
laughingheart

laughingheart

Senior Member
#7
Sep 21, 2016
1,709
1,669
113
#7
Happy is a difficult standard by which to measure the success of your life. Your emotions can lie to you about the truth of your life. Depression can change your brain chemistry, and so can the weather, medication and stress. What do you consider as essential for happiness? Is it having everything you want or having what you need? Are you grateful for the things you already have? Are you even aware of all that you have?
For me, for the most part, happiness is a choice. I choose my focus. Am I happy? Well when I consider that I woke up in a warm bed in a quiet room with a solid roof, had food and the teeth to chew it and shoes that fit and keep out the rain, then yes I'm happy. It was my son's birthday today. We went to lunch and spent the time talking. I love him and I like him. He loves me too. I am happy. I live with pain and should have died 10 years ago but the fact that I feel pain means I am alive and so I am happy. There are many days now without pain and there is hope. For that I am happy. OK I'll stop there but depending on my focus I can choose a focus that allows me contentment, joy and gratitude. Am I happy? Yes. Why? Because I choose it.
 
BrotherMike

BrotherMike

Be Still and Know
#9
Jan 8, 2018
1,617
1,671
113
#9
I am blessed and at peace... totally happy? No there are a few things I would change and one of them is my work schedule. Besides that I try to focus on the peace that passes understanding every day and that helps me carry on this journey :)

On a side note... we can’t rely on others to make us happy, happiness comes from within.
 
laughingheart

laughingheart

Senior Member
#10
Sep 21, 2016
1,709
1,669
113
#10
Going_Nowhere said:
This is going to sound horrible, but I think....if I was the total opposite of the person that I am....I would be happy. I hate myself and there's just so much wrong with my life. I could go into details, but (and I hope you understand) I'd rather not. I feel like telling people who aren't happy one thing: Just be glad you're not me. Because that's honestly how I feel. I feel....highly unlucky....to say the least.
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I am so sorry that you are in pain.
 
Lafftur

Lafftur

Senior Member
#11
Apr 18, 2017
6,896
3,636
113
#11
Going_Nowhere said:
So....this is a simple and pretty straightforward question.


Are you happy with your life?


And if not, what would make you happy....if anything? Or what do you think is keeping you from being happy? I know some single people might say getting a boyfriend or girlfriend would make them happier. But other than the lack of romance in your life....what else would make you happier? More friends? A better job? Certain problems or obstacles in your life finally going away or being resolved? Please be specific if you don't mind. But if it's too personal or private, or you just don't feel like sharing, then that's fine too. :)
Click to expand...
Oh goodness, this sounds like I accidentally stumbled into the laboratory of a THERAPIST!!!

Quick, everybody RUN!!!!

Man applies his thoughts to our problems and we end up worse!!

Best to pray, and rely on the Holy Spirit to COUNSEL us!! :love:(y)
 
Lafftur

Lafftur

Senior Member
#13
Apr 18, 2017
6,896
3,636
113
#13
BrotherMike said:
This is the BEST advice! His love is so powerful, passionate, and personal the best counselor ever!
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It’s The Holy Spirit that counsels us BECAUSE of God’s Love for us. Spend time asking The Father for The Holy Spirit to counsel us......... then, hold on, God just might answer!!!!! :love:(y)
 
M

morefaithrequired

Guest
#14
#14
hope you dont mind an old married answering. i think i can make a worthwhile contribution.
Im not happy right now because I regret quitting some well paid jobs in the past . And hence my remaining years look like borderline poverty. I could go into my wife's cancer story but not right now.
So its a combo of guilt and dread.
But you know what? When I live in the moment, im happy happy happy!! when:
-dog makes me smile every day
-wife can show her childlike side
-Im feeling good physically
-im hitting the right chords on the guitar
- the ocean renews my body and soul
 
M

morefaithrequired

Guest
#15
#15
Going_Nowhere said:
This is going to sound horrible, but I think....if I was the total opposite of the person that I am....I would be happy. I hate myself and there's just so much wrong with my life. I could go into details, but (and I hope you understand) I'd rather not. I feel like telling people who aren't happy one thing: Just be glad you're not me. Because that's honestly how I feel. I feel....highly unlucky....to say the least.
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your appearance?
shyness? lack of confidence?
If you do I can relate a little.
 
M

morefaithrequired

Guest
#16
#16
Lafftur said:
Oh goodness, this sounds like I accidentally stumbled into the laboratory of a THERAPIST!!!

Quick, everybody RUN!!!!

Man applies his thoughts to our problems and we end up worse!!

Best to pray, and rely on the Holy Spirit to COUNSEL us!! :love:(y)
Click to expand...
sometimes just sharing with some trusted friends is all we need
 
M

morefaithrequired

Guest
#17
#17
laughingheart said:
Happy is a difficult standard by which to measure the success of your life. Your emotions can lie to you about the truth of your life. Depression can change your brain chemistry, and so can the weather, medication and stress. What do you consider as essential for happiness? Is it having everything you want or having what you need? Are you grateful for the things you already have? Are you even aware of all that you have?
For me, for the most part, happiness is a choice. I choose my focus. Am I happy? Well when I consider that I woke up in a warm bed in a quiet room with a solid roof, had food and the teeth to chew it and shoes that fit and keep out the rain, then yes I'm happy. It was my son's birthday today. We went to lunch and spent the time talking. I love him and I like him. He loves me too. I am happy. I live with pain and should have died 10 years ago but the fact that I feel pain means I am alive and so I am happy. There are many days now without pain and there is hope. For that I am happy. OK I'll stop there but depending on my focus I can choose a focus that allows me contentment, joy and gratitude. Am I happy? Yes. Why? Because I choose it.
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i have daily physical pain so I can relate.
 
M

morefaithrequired

Guest
#18
#18
going nowhere
i honestly think i can help you.
could you PM me?
 
love_comes_softly

love_comes_softly

Well-known member
#19
Feb 13, 2019
768
823
93
#19
I am where the Lord has me in life. Is it where I pictured myself? No, honestly it’s not, but I praise God that my relationship with Him is strong. My family is healthy, I have everything I need and I’m surrounded by lots of love.

Are there things I would change? Yes, of course. I think I’d like a career change. I wish I were more freed up in the area of not thinking about societies expectations and timelines for people. I wish that those I love didn’t have to go through such trials.

BUT I have no idea how those things I would change would alter mine or others lives. I’m content in knowing that God’s plan and course of action in my life is the best there could possibly be. I will stick with that. I am happy with that.

@Going_Nowhere , I pray an abundance of peace in your life. I don’t know your situation or circumstances, but I do know life in general can be hard. I find it easier not to evaluate each day by whether I’m happy or not, but rather what were the good things that day, even if they are tiny things.
 
M

morefaithrequired

Guest
#20
#20
love_comes_softly said:
I am where the Lord has me in life. Is it where I pictured myself? No, honestly it’s not, but I praise God that my relationship with Him is strong. My family is healthy, I have everything I need and I’m surrounded by lots of love.

Are there things I would change? Yes, of course. I think I’d like a career change. I wish I were more freed up in the area of not thinking about societies expectations and timelines for people. I wish that those I love didn’t have to go through such trials.

BUT I have no idea how those things I would change would alter mine or others lives. I’m content in knowing that God’s plan and course of action in my life is the best there could possibly be. I will stick with that. I am happy with that.

@Going_Nowhere , I pray an abundance of peace in your life. I don’t know your situation or circumstances, but I do know life in general can be hard. I find it easier not to evaluate each day by whether I’m happy or not, but rather what were the good things that day, even if they are tiny things.
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exactly!
a gratitude attitude!
 
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