Hello
@Robo36, your OP questions are important ones because having a proper understanding of John 3:5 is so vital .. but .. it's also a very difficult verse
(& passage) to exegete properly, and because it is, it's very controversial. The biggest problem that we have with this verse
(as I'm sure you already know) is due in large part to the 3 word phrase, "
born of water", and then, to a lesser degree, the entire phrase
(which is either "born of water and the Spirit" ~or~ "born of water and spirit").
As a result, several churches/denominations teach, for instance, that water baptism is salvific, as well that one's salvation can be achieved apart from saving faith in Christ
(e.g. paedobaptism). So it seems to me that the first thing that we need to decide
(as we look at this verse/passage a little more closely) is this:
is water baptism what John 3:5 is actually referring to/teaching (which is a discussion that should prove to be an interesting one around a place like this ).
Here are the links to two short articles that take a look into that question (and others).
Looking forward to reading more as it comes in
God bless you!
~Deut
p.s. - I thought I'd include the passage in question for easy reference.
John 3
1 There was a man of the Pharisees, named Nicodemus, a ruler of the Jews;
2 this man came to Jesus by night and said to Him, “Rabbi, we know that You have come from God as a teacher; for no one can do these signs that You do unless God is with him.”
3 Jesus answered and said to him, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born again he cannot see the kingdom of God.”
4 Nicodemus *said to Him, “How can a man be born when he is old? He cannot enter a second time into his mother’s womb and be born, can he?”
5 Jesus answered, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born of water and the Spirit he cannot enter into the kingdom of God.
6 “That which is born of the flesh is flesh, and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit.
7 “Do not be amazed that I said to you, ‘You must be born again.’
8 “The wind blows where it wishes and you hear the sound of it, but do not know where it comes from and where it is going; so is everyone who is born of the Spirit.”