Did your friend, as a believer in rehab, admit he was powerless over his disease/addiction? Some are unaware that the purpose of the 12 step program has been -from the very start- to help people establish and maintain a personal relationship with the One True God. The AA preamble, which includes a recitation of the twelve steps, read at the opening of many meetings including every single one I have ever attended over the last thirty years where I live, includes the line: "There is One Who has all power. That One is God. May you find Him now." It is from chapter 5 of the AA Big Book 
RARELY HAVE WE SEEN a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path. Those who do not recover are people who cannot or will not completely give themselves to this simple program, usually men and women who are constitutionally incapable of being honest with themselves. There are such unfortunates. They are not at fault; they seem to have been born that way. They are naturally incapable of grasping and developing a manner of living which demands rigorous honesty. Their chances are less than average. There are those, too, who suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders, but many of them do recover if they have the capacity to be honest.
Our stories disclose in a general way what we used to be like, what happened, and what we are like now. If you have decided that you want what we have and are willing to go to any length to get it - then you are ready to take certain steps.
At some of these we balked. We thought that we could find an easier, softer way. But we could not. With all earnestness at our command, we beg of you to be fearless and thorough from the very start. Some of us have tried to hold on to our old ideas and the result was nil until we let go absolutely.
Remember that we deal with alcohol - cunning, baffling, powerful! Without help it is too much for us. But there is One who has all power - that One is God. May you find Him now.
Half measures availed us nothing. We stood at the turning point. We asked His protection and care with complete abandon.
Here are the steps we took, which are suggested as a program of recovery:
1 We admitted we were powerless over alcohol - that our lives had become unmanageable.
2 Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
3 Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.
4 Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
5 Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
6 Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
7 Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
8 Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.
9 Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
10 Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
11 Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.
12 Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics and to practice these principles in all our affairs.
Many of us exclaimed, "What an order! I can't go through with it." Do not be discouraged. No one among us has been able to maintain anything like perfect adherence to these principles. We are not saints. The point is, that we are willing to grow along spiritual lines. The principles we have set down are guides to progress. We claim spiritual progress rather than spiritual perfection.
Our description of the alcoholic, the chapter to the agnostic, and our personal adventures before and after make clear three pertinent ideas:
(a) That we were alcoholic and could not manage our own lives.
(b) That probably no human power could have relieved our alcoholism.
(c) That God could and would if He were sought.
So, how did the many different types of sinners, including alcoholics, in the days before these "Anonymous" 12-step programs, deal with their addictions?
I am not persuaded that one needs to submit themselves to a secular 12 point program in order to get past addictions or sins.
Personally, I am not convinced that it is always good to associated with a particular group of people meeting around a particular sin perpetually, as the sin can form part of their identity. I have heard some say that they found their best drinking buddies or sex partners at such a group.
One of the churches I attended had a group called the Mat where people met in individual groups to discuss sin issues but those individuals were not specifically isolated with only sinners of their particular flavor. By the way, I don't think the particular struggle I had was resolved by meeting with this group. The desire for the sin diminished as I delved deeper into communion with God through prayer, study, and other spiritual disciplines.
I do believe that fellowship is important, but I don't think I'd have much in common with unbelievers, who don't share the same common tie with Jesus, but shared the same sin issue.
