So I was reading the book of Acts today to see if the Pauline Epistles contradict Acts (Ive read a good article saying it does not and it made sense just double checking because of Ocd and anxiety) but than I read the story of the married couple who tried to join the Apostles and with held funds and both died! It scared me so much that I almost puked....I dont dont know what to do. I tried drawing a comic today and I was pondering a funny one today and I felt myself think "I hope this doesn't turn bad in my head" and of course blashemous thoughts entered my head now when I think of particular characters from my books or anything the thoughts sideline me 😢 I cant stand my brain! It will not stop!
Faith is the operant power of the Holy spirit, and just in getting things done or have them happen/ established... Those people believed that the Holy Spirit would leave them or have left them after they have committed that offense .. The spirit is what keeps a person alive, and when He goes you can no longer be alive. So in reality it is not their offence that did it, it was their belief/ faith.
Jesus with the woman of issue of blood, he tells her after she gets her healing by touching him that her faith has made her whole. Not only this but it says that he felt power come out of Him when she did it, that is why he turned around and said " who touched me?". Normally He would go around and administer faith and power on His own, but He never had a person operate and act in faith on their own.....
I have personally seen many accounts in my life with this happening even on things i didn't want for example i used to get really bad allergies when doing lawn work on my yard. My belief in getting allergies from dealing with it were so bad that even if i knew that i was going to have to do it i would already start sneezing, and my nose would start running. I remember i would literally take medicine as a preemptive measure to deal with the allergies before they would even start and i would get even more sick shortly after. Faith/belief and works can take you there. My faith was that lawn work makes me have allergies, and my works were believing and taking medicine..
Peter in acts is speaking over the two, and he believes that they would die for lying and withholding... Understand that these guys would on a daily operate in faith over people because the people didn't know to do it themselves yet. Also in the book of acts the apostles were still new and somewhat still on that old testament condemn mindset, where if you do something dumb you die. And as they believe, it must be so according to faith in the spirit.
As for what's going on in your skull, it is what it is. We all have it, and fighting thoughts is like trying to have a fist fight with smoke. You are not your thoughts. All the brain does is regurgitate/repeat things and ideas it has picked up from being in the world. It is wise to realize that it is not you, and not to identify yourself with it. Rather it would be more fruitful to identify with being a saint, righteous in Christ, because that is you. When the negative blasphemous thoughts pass, observe them as they come while trying to give you that identity. Rather than feel guilty and negatively invested in them and about your perceived self with these passing thoughts, try laughing at them because they aren't you...
Practicing this is both an act of denial of self, and renewing the mind to who you really are in Christ. Its one of the things i have picked up and it works, you might find it useful.
1
1
