I hear it all the time about people being in things and doing things because they believe that they don’t deserve better or are valuable enough to get better. In our sinful nature we don’t deserve anything, but God graciously gives us everything we need for life and godliness. So how do you hold on to move in that grace of God rather than accept something less like “I’ll have sex with this person because I’m not a virgin anyway or I’m lonely”? How do you hold out for the pure, lovely and good of life rather than compromising because you don’t think that you can ever get more? This applies to relationships with any person, jobs, having fun, and all other life situations.
People walk through stages all over the world. There are 2 things people have to learn: 1. Understanding God's love for them. 2. Understanding how to play the game in the world. By understanding God's love, even if they don't agree with him they will want to follow his principles on the basis that he's on their side so it's correct. The world on the other hand has its own set of rules, and it's not really a sin but a lack of understanding about the world. For example a teen may date a mentally abusive guy but not know it's abuse bc kids are very black and white and they haven't acquired that psychological understanding.
The easiest solution for me is to trust God and try to take out the emotion as much as possible. This allows for me to pray and go through things logically.
I've been through cheating, job loss, infertility for years and years, and severe health issues. Life moves like seasons...up and down. It's like that for everyone, and the longer you live the more downs you'll experience. There are still many good things as well.
Another thing is letting go of control. That was my key to happiness. It doesn't mean not going after what you want, or the good life. It helped every relationship I'm in and every situation. It makes me a better wife and mother and person. When something is going wrong I say well I lost the battle, but I won the war. In other words eventually I'll get what I pray for. It was like that for my son after years of surgeries trying to get him. You could say the same thing for anything, dating, jobs, etc. You go through the valley to get to the mountain. It's the control and pride that actually makes us very unhappy. And if you're going through a hard time it's okay to be upset (it's natural), but the sun will rise in the morning.
