There is no free moral agent in a marriage. No longer two but one. Her body belongs to him and his body belongs to her, until death. I’m not suggesting delivering the death penalty. It’s not even an eye for an eye. It’s merely exercising your authority, teaching a lesson, as the Bible permits. I don’t understand why Christians think we are supposed to be punching bags under every circumstance. Sometimes you have to stand up for what’s right, and singing songs doesn’t always work. At times perhaps the hands of God need to be the fists of God. I trust the Spirit will instruct me when that is necessary. In this instance the OP says the Spirit restrained him from doing so. Good for him to heed the voice of God. If there comes a time I am instructed otherwise, I have no reluctance in doing so. He has made vessels for many purposes.
Wife Abandoned Living With Single Man
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Starting with ourselves is the best place to start, for good change.. seeking our Lord Saviour King Priest Shepherd to help us. When we examine ourselves first before others, it’s likely to be fruitful when we seek Gods help, guidance, counsel, wisdom, Word ... ((much more could be mentioned from His abundant help))
I’m learning this from years of frustration, (and the rest) about other people.
Really, I can only be responsible for me..... yet we’re all not islands either, we need to live with one another, whatever our relationship is to one another. We’re accountable to each other. Yet situations can be complicated. You know yours.
Praying for your requests Chris, I’m so sorry you’re going through this, must be horrible, sounds like there’s some complex issues underlying it all that’s contributed to the current situation. Agree with the suggestion of listening to Patrick Doyle, he’s really a cool guy who counsels from personal experience not just from textbooks if you know what I mean. Pray you find some sound solid godly counsel from some brothers in the Lord. I can understand wanting to go a few rounds with the guy but please listen to the Spirit not your flesh. It might go against your own understanding, but the flesh isn’t usually right or wise.
There’s a verse about sowing to The Spirit rather than to flesh... I’d like to start a thread about how do we do that, sow to the Spirit.... (tangent)
Some verses —> hope they help, from Gods word so are for life and our edification, to help us.
May Father God help your situation and Jesus be your strength, Holy Spirit be your comfort, and guiding steps in the months to come.
Jesus Bless you and your family.
Oh and P.S. be careful what you do regarding any retribution stuff, make sure nothing could be used against you cos you have a little girl, people can be awfully vindictive so don’t give this guy any ammo to use against you or your little one. Just a bit of practical advice, I don’t know maybe I shouldn’t give advice but Please, don’t place yourself in a criminal stance by being violent. When we sincerely ask our Father for His wisdom, He gives freely... Take good care.
Hebrews
19 Having therefore, brethren, boldness to enter into the holiest by the blood of Jesus,
20 By a new and living way, which he hath consecrated for us, through the veil, that is to say, his flesh;
21 And having an high priest over the house of God;
22 Let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled from an evil conscience, and our bodies washed with pure water.
23 Let us hold fast the profession of our faith without wavering; (for he is faithful that promised
24 And let us consider one another to provoke unto love and to good works:
2 Timothy 2:21
James
4 But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing.
5 If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.
6 But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering.
Proverbs 2:1-6
James 3:17
Proverbs 8:12, 33–34
Ephesians 1:16–18
Praying for a good friend for you who you can trust and confide in, and talk to, someone reliable who can give you sound wisdom. Praying for your wife too to remember that she is a married Christian woman and to find somewhere more appropriate to live and walk with her Saviour once again. May Jesus help you and your wife with all the issues that are challenging. We all have our issues, they’re just different. God bless you with His Peace.
“For I will keep him in perfect peace who mind is fixed on Him (Jesus)” Isaiah somewhere...
Sorry it’s a bit long.
I’m learning this from years of frustration, (and the rest) about other people.
Really, I can only be responsible for me..... yet we’re all not islands either, we need to live with one another, whatever our relationship is to one another. We’re accountable to each other. Yet situations can be complicated. You know yours.
Praying for your requests Chris, I’m so sorry you’re going through this, must be horrible, sounds like there’s some complex issues underlying it all that’s contributed to the current situation. Agree with the suggestion of listening to Patrick Doyle, he’s really a cool guy who counsels from personal experience not just from textbooks if you know what I mean. Pray you find some sound solid godly counsel from some brothers in the Lord. I can understand wanting to go a few rounds with the guy but please listen to the Spirit not your flesh. It might go against your own understanding, but the flesh isn’t usually right or wise.
There’s a verse about sowing to The Spirit rather than to flesh... I’d like to start a thread about how do we do that, sow to the Spirit.... (tangent)
Some verses —> hope they help, from Gods word so are for life and our edification, to help us.
May Father God help your situation and Jesus be your strength, Holy Spirit be your comfort, and guiding steps in the months to come.
Jesus Bless you and your family.
Oh and P.S. be careful what you do regarding any retribution stuff, make sure nothing could be used against you cos you have a little girl, people can be awfully vindictive so don’t give this guy any ammo to use against you or your little one. Just a bit of practical advice, I don’t know maybe I shouldn’t give advice but Please, don’t place yourself in a criminal stance by being violent. When we sincerely ask our Father for His wisdom, He gives freely... Take good care.
Hebrews
19 Having therefore, brethren, boldness to enter into the holiest by the blood of Jesus,
20 By a new and living way, which he hath consecrated for us, through the veil, that is to say, his flesh;
21 And having an high priest over the house of God;
22 Let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled from an evil conscience, and our bodies washed with pure water.
23 Let us hold fast the profession of our faith without wavering; (for he is faithful that promised
24 And let us consider one another to provoke unto love and to good works:
2 Timothy 2:21
James
4 But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing.
5 If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.
6 But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering.
Proverbs 2:1-6
James 3:17
Proverbs 8:12, 33–34
Ephesians 1:16–18
Praying for a good friend for you who you can trust and confide in, and talk to, someone reliable who can give you sound wisdom. Praying for your wife too to remember that she is a married Christian woman and to find somewhere more appropriate to live and walk with her Saviour once again. May Jesus help you and your wife with all the issues that are challenging. We all have our issues, they’re just different. God bless you with His Peace.
“For I will keep him in perfect peace who mind is fixed on Him (Jesus)” Isaiah somewhere...
Sorry it’s a bit long.
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P.S. — any surveillance programmes are tools to be used righteously, for Good. We will answer for what we do, so pray do well. Pray Do what it right, good, of virtue.
Coercive control is a crime nowand using a geo tracking programme for the wrong purposes, constitutes an unrighteousness act. We have a choice to do what is right or to do wrong, choose wisely. God bless
Coercive control is a crime nowand using a geo tracking programme for the wrong purposes, constitutes an unrighteousness act. We have a choice to do what is right or to do wrong, choose wisely. God bless
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Deror, I needed to know every word, no need to apologize for obeying God. I know in my heart and Spirit you are right on everything. You speak truth and life into my situation and I want to say thank you so much from the depths of my hurting heart. I pray may Christ richly bless you and obtain favor in your life till overflowing. I have hope from you, the Lord's promises and those who cared enough to share their concerns. The Lord gave me His Word about my marriage in Matthew 19:5-6. I am in the wilderness being shown His merciful love that I don't deserve and changing from the inside-out. To God be the glory. I feel led to keep you posted my brothers and sisters in Christ because breakthrough is here for all of God's people.
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Sounds like she had good reasons for leaving, but she should have filed for divorce instead of committing adultery. I wouldn't direct any anger towards the other guy, because if it weren't him it would have likely of been someone else. She obviously decided talk is cheap and gave up on her marriage. Perhaps that's what it took to instill change in you? You were wrong, now she's doing wrong, and 2 wrongs don't make a right. So I'd just keep working on yourself and move on, odd's are she's fallen in love with this other man, is being treated nice, and has no desire to go back to the mess that she endured for so long. Probably not what you wanted to hear, but when a woman makes a definitive move like that and leaves, she's likely made up her mind and given up on the life she left behind.. jmo
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Dan58, I appreciate your observations. You say she should file for divorce. The Bible is strict against divorce. I admit, I had behaved in ways where I was too blinded to see the destruction I had caused. Now, she made her choice to go in the direction she's currently in. Does that mean it's over? Only God knows, but what I know is that God already promised me Matthew 19:5-6. Like you said, I can only work on myself, which is in effect already. As for saying she loves the OM, I can truly say it's not grounds of love at all. She is looking at him as the "rescuer" and her actions are not based on Biblical love, but lust. She is not aware of the truth because she has a wounded heart only Christ can heal. Prayer is essential for miracles, please be in prayer and thank you
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N
There are many brothers and sisters here who are far more wise than I am in regards to marriage.....
Maybe I don't have much advice.... but I am so so so sorry for your pain, nothing hurts quite like someone you love so much, someone you would live and die for....not giving you the same care
😔
Father,
please bless this man with the wisdom to know how to handle this very painful season... please Lord help him see what it is you want him to see
God I know it is within your power to help this man in ways beyond what we can even ask for
please give him the strength for his daughter to follow your will and leadership even if it hurts
please bring him the joy that can only be found in you
Father in Jesus mighty name please comfort him and see his heart which wants to restore his marriage ... the holy union where he was joined to this woman
.....
and Lord.... if it is in your will... please bring them together again and heal them both from any pain or torment or doubt which brought this forth or may stem from after this season...
amen
brother...
i see you coming to God in your time of pain .. the only one who can ever love with a perfect love. . . He is our only hope
i pray for endless blessings to you
and assurance in His promises
and a life today where you can wake up feeling His love instead of the horrible pain the world brings to us
i am truely sorry
Maybe I don't have much advice.... but I am so so so sorry for your pain, nothing hurts quite like someone you love so much, someone you would live and die for....not giving you the same care
😔
Father,
please bless this man with the wisdom to know how to handle this very painful season... please Lord help him see what it is you want him to see
God I know it is within your power to help this man in ways beyond what we can even ask for
please give him the strength for his daughter to follow your will and leadership even if it hurts
please bring him the joy that can only be found in you
Father in Jesus mighty name please comfort him and see his heart which wants to restore his marriage ... the holy union where he was joined to this woman
.....
and Lord.... if it is in your will... please bring them together again and heal them both from any pain or torment or doubt which brought this forth or may stem from after this season...
amen
brother...
i see you coming to God in your time of pain .. the only one who can ever love with a perfect love. . . He is our only hope
i pray for endless blessings to you
and assurance in His promises
and a life today where you can wake up feeling His love instead of the horrible pain the world brings to us
i am truely sorry
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Thanks so much, I hope you were encouraged and I hope that I didn’t sound stern on my second post.
It’s just I’ve experienced stalking so when you mentioned the surveillance thing, it reminded me, but hey, God is the ultimate watchman so, the way technology is going, it’s becoming more & more “the norm” (ugh) to be under surveillance, (esp UK) yet Jesus did say, I came to set the captives free and open the prison doors...hmmm, (tangent) anyway, I pray God Almighty watches over all your needs and provides them for you, and things work out good for you and your loved ones.
The wilderness experience I found to be very distressing sometimes but when someone spoke “Don’t think something weird is happening to you when you go through trials“ [1 Peter 4:12-19] it was a great comfort so I hope the verse is a comfort for you too
His Love is really there big time in the wilderness... Pray you hold tight to all He is showing you.. It’s a special time even though it’s such a difficult time too. Draw in close to Heavenly Fathers heart, The Word and the Holy Spirit of God. May you be so blessed and your cup overflow with Gods goodness, Grace and Peace.Also 1 Peter 1 is a comfort, as it speaks about going through distressing trials, that even our suffering has a purpose. So I pray you can hold on cos we (believers) we all go through the wilderness, you’re not alone in this and even though it’s a rough journey, God is with you through the valleys, and Father God grows us, teaches us, even draws us closer to Him if we seek Him through Jesus and The Holy Spirit.. cos then when we pay attention to HIM, we hear Him and what He is teaching us, ABBA can even work miraculously through these trials - remember when Jesus was in the wilderness, He came through an overcomer and used The Word to overcome the devil when that sneaky bugger tried to trick Jesus! You’ll come through this in Christ.. Praying for your wife and daughter. Amen breakthrough, keep us posted. God bless you, have a good night.
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L
Sometimes accountability seems harsh, but we hope to do and say what is best for our brothers in Christ, that they might grow and over come.
You seem like a man humbled by the events transpiring. If only more men would be humbled by being honest about the messes we create; this is a good thing even though it hurts. If you heed the advice given here you will come out a better man. Isn't that what we all want and need ... To be a better man.
We are not knocked out of the race because we stumble, we must rise up and run hard, and finish. You are well on your way and I salute you for it.
You seem like a man humbled by the events transpiring. If only more men would be humbled by being honest about the messes we create; this is a good thing even though it hurts. If you heed the advice given here you will come out a better man. Isn't that what we all want and need ... To be a better man.
We are not knocked out of the race because we stumble, we must rise up and run hard, and finish. You are well on your way and I salute you for it.
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Thanks so much, I hope you were encouraged and I hope that I didn’t sound stern on my second post.
It’s just I’ve experienced stalking so when you mentioned the surveillance thing, it reminded me, but hey, God is the ultimate watchman so, the way technology is going, it’s becoming more & more “the norm” (ugh) to be under surveillance, (esp UK) yet Jesus did say, I came to set the captives free and open the prison doors...hmmm, (tangent) anyway, I pray God Almighty watches over all your needs and provides them for you, and things work out good for you and your loved ones.
The wilderness experience I found to be very distressing sometimes but when someone spoke “Don’t think something weird is happening to you when you go through trials“ [1 Peter 4:12-19] it was a great comfort so I hope the verse is a comfort for you too His Love is really there big time in the wilderness... Pray you hold tight to all He is showing you.. It’s a special time even though it’s such a difficult time too. Draw in close to Heavenly Fathers heart, The Word and the Holy Spirit of God. May you be so blessed and your cup overflow with Gods goodness, Grace and Peace.
Also 1 Peter 1 is a comfort, as it speaks about going through distressing trials, that even our suffering has a purpose. So I pray you can hold on cos we (believers) we all go through the wilderness, you’re not alone in this and even though it’s a rough journey, God is with you through the valleys, and Father God grows us, teaches us, even draws us closer to Him if we seek Him through Jesus and The Holy Spirit.. cos then when we pay attention to HIM, we hear Him and what He is teaching us, ABBA can even work miraculously through these trials - remember when Jesus was in the wilderness, He came through an overcomer and used The Word to overcome the devil when that sneaky bugger tried to trick Jesus! You’ll come through this in Christ.. Praying for your wife and daughter. Amen breakthrough, keep us posted. God bless you, have a good night.
It’s just I’ve experienced stalking so when you mentioned the surveillance thing, it reminded me, but hey, God is the ultimate watchman so, the way technology is going, it’s becoming more & more “the norm” (ugh) to be under surveillance, (esp UK) yet Jesus did say, I came to set the captives free and open the prison doors...hmmm, (tangent) anyway, I pray God Almighty watches over all your needs and provides them for you, and things work out good for you and your loved ones.
The wilderness experience I found to be very distressing sometimes but when someone spoke “Don’t think something weird is happening to you when you go through trials“ [1 Peter 4:12-19] it was a great comfort so I hope the verse is a comfort for you too
His Love is really there big time in the wilderness... Pray you hold tight to all He is showing you.. It’s a special time even though it’s such a difficult time too. Draw in close to Heavenly Fathers heart, The Word and the Holy Spirit of God. May you be so blessed and your cup overflow with Gods goodness, Grace and Peace.Also 1 Peter 1 is a comfort, as it speaks about going through distressing trials, that even our suffering has a purpose. So I pray you can hold on cos we (believers) we all go through the wilderness, you’re not alone in this and even though it’s a rough journey, God is with you through the valleys, and Father God grows us, teaches us, even draws us closer to Him if we seek Him through Jesus and The Holy Spirit.. cos then when we pay attention to HIM, we hear Him and what He is teaching us, ABBA can even work miraculously through these trials - remember when Jesus was in the wilderness, He came through an overcomer and used The Word to overcome the devil when that sneaky bugger tried to trick Jesus! You’ll come through this in Christ.. Praying for your wife and daughter. Amen breakthrough, keep us posted. God bless you, have a good night.
Blessings, favor, miracles and answered prayers be upon you in Jesus name.
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Thanks so much bro haha Yes, God is so good! He draws us to Himself. Recently I was reminded how He thinks thoughts of Peace towards people, not of evil, to give peeps a Hope and a future. (Through and In Christ) It’s good to follow Jesus. Good Shepherd indeed. I love Him so much now. Thanks so much for the blessings. I’m learning too and growing up. Thanks again. Peace to you and yours in Jesus name.
Yes, God is so good! He draws us to Himself. Recently I was reminded how He thinks thoughts of Peace towards people, not of evil, to give peeps a Hope and a future. (Through and In Christ) It’s good to follow Jesus. Good Shepherd indeed. I love Him so much now. Thanks so much for the blessings. I’m learning too and growing up. Thanks again. Peace to you and yours in Jesus name.-
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Recently, my wife and I had reasonably good talks on the phone - as goog as it will get. However, she did say that she doesn't know about being led in the spirit to stay with me, but if the Lord tells her then she will. On the other hand, she said if she was to pursue the "D" word, that I make it easy on her. I was speechless, no words could express the shock when she put that on me.
Please keep her and I in your prayers. God bless you all!
Please keep her and I in your prayers. God bless you all!
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I am sorry you and your wife are separated, turning back to God is the best thing for you to do. right now, just focus on God, it is going to take a long time before you can convince her you have changed. the Bible says ( matt. 6:33 - But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and ALL THESE THINGS SHALL be ADDED unto you.
so his word doesn't lie....so seek him and don't do it just to get your wife back...do it cause sinners out there need all Christians fully armed . we are to care for others , so many are going to hell and we don't seem to take it serious enough do we? so seek him first and he will add all that is in his will to you
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I am sorry you and your wife are separated, turning back to God is the best thing for you to do. right now, just focus on God, it is going to take a long time before you can convince her you have changed. the Bible says ( matt. 6:33 - But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and ALL THESE THINGS SHALL be ADDED unto you.
so his word doesn't lie....so seek him and don't do it just to get your wife back...do it cause sinners out there need all Christians fully armed . we are to care for others , so many are going to hell and we don't seem to take it serious enough do we? so seek him first and he will add all that is in his will to you
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Jan, thank you for the encouragement. Yes, very important to take my marriage seriously living it out seeking God. I can finally say crying tears of joy because God is real and forgave an unforgivable person that day I hit rockbottom crying out to Him. Change did occur in my heart and soul, but it doesn't change the fact I'm still in my wilderness journey. Now, I get to go through it with God holding me up by His righteous right hand. This saving grace is for me and not for my wife. She has to own the choices she made and as for me, I confessed my faults and failures to her already. I did it for her, our marriage, to God and myself - God wiped the slate clean in my life now. Does this mean everything for me is all hunkydori? No, I still go through satan's attacks, moments of weakness, mourning the loss of my wife and child, pain, anxiety, and fear of the unknown. These are all very real I'm going through, but God is my promisemaker and waymaker of my marriage and family.
For man it is impossible, but with God ALL things are possible!
Thank you for the heartfelt post. Shalom
For man it is impossible, but with God ALL things are possible!
Thank you for the heartfelt post. Shalom
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well it sounds like you got in touch with God...now is the WALK in him, remember - matt.6:33...God may want you to walk with him right now, so he can work out your marriage with your wife, she will have to hit rock bottom next. so give God time to work out things for you and her. prayer for you and her and your child, give the child a lot of attention and love , don't put the child in the middle, this can be unhealthy for the child and cause the child to rebell and act out hurts. God's got this.
well it sounds like you got in touch with God...now is the WALK in him, remember - matt.6:33...God may want you to walk with him right now, so he can work out your marriage with your wife, she will have to hit rock bottom next. so give God time to work out things for you and her. prayer for you and her and your child, give the child a lot of attention and love , don't put the child in the middle, this can be unhealthy for the child and cause the child to rebell and act out hurts. God's got this.
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