If you’re planning to go on a date with someone special, who should pay for it?

[Davenport]

I once dated a girl who made more money than me. She expected me to pay when we went out. I dumped her mooching butt.

You have a job, you pay, too.

You want be a stay-at-home mom, you get a job until you're a mother. It's 2018 and men are oppressed to benefit women in the work place.

 

[CharliRenee]

I once dated a girl who made more money than me. She expected me to pay when we went out. I dumped her mooching butt.

You have a job, you pay, too.

You want be a stay-at-home mom, you get a job until you're a mother. It's 2018 and men are oppressed to benefit women in the work place.

You are such a smooth, sweet talker.

 

[cinder]

Let's see assuming I were on an outing that's been established as a date (which I do not consider an automatic thing just because the person I'm doing said outing with happens to be male). I would expect mutality, prefer generosity, and expect him to keep unpleasant financial surprises to a minimum. So if we're going to a movie or play or other event and he expects me to pay for my ticket, that should be stated at the time of invitation as well as the cost; it shouldn't be sprung on me on the way there. If he's paying for me he just needs to say not to worry about the money. If I'm driving and have to pay for gas and parking, it would be nice for him to balance that out some way and vice versa ( Example: with one friend (not a date, just a good example of balance) she drove us both and paid for parking so I picked up her dinner after the play). Also I think if you're the invitee, it's also just good manners to offer and be prepared to pay your share.

I'll also say that while it might be nice to have someone spend massive amounts of money on me to give me a wonderful evening, it might also hinder his long term chances (especially if done frequently) because part of the long term happiness of a couple would be dependent on how they handle their finances together and so I'm evaluating how he manages and values his money.

If this gets too complicated, my fallback plan is to become a rich old maid and spend my money visiting all my CC singles forum friends.

What would you say if you (a single working mom) were engaged to a man (with adult children) and he often let you pay for coffee, dinner, and outings? Or he conveniently forgets his wallet? When my oldest daughters were dating, their boyfriend/fiance would fill up their gas tanks if they drove to meet them, would slip money into their purses if they made a home-cooked meal for the two of them and would NEVER allow them to pay for a thing.

Assuming that I'm understanding the situation right: he's not contributing at all to your finances or the financial needs of your children (and the children are young enough that they need caring for); he's planning to marry you and become part of your household; he's still making you pay for yourself and often for him out of your already tight budget (I'm assuming this is a normal situation, not a multi-millionaire actress dating a delivery guy type of financial disparity). I'd say, what the crap am I doing engaged to this guy? I just can't imagine that a guy who acts that selfish with his money that far into a relationship is going to be any sort of advantage or blessing to have in your life. Marrying him will be like adding another child to the family only he'll be even less likely to be respectful and co-operative than a well raised child.

 

[toinena]

Over half the people who voted in the poll say the man should pay. You people need to catch up with 2018.

In the old days when guys worked and women stayed home, yes, the man should pay.

These days, women work and so should pay their own expenses.

Due to oppression and discrimination, man make less money today than they made 30 years ago. Increases in productivity should have resulted in men making many times what they use to make, but no.

It is still a fact that men earn in average more than women. An engineer (male dominated) earns more than a nurse (female dominated) although their education has the same duration/credits.

It is also a fact there are more part time workers in the female population.

Finally it is easier for a man to climb the career ladder and get an executive job.

So. I think if the dating couple has unequal wages as the pattern seem to show, the man should still pay. If I earn more than the man dating me, I would pay.

 

[toinena]

You are such a smooth, sweet talker.

I wonder if he is still single..... but I guess some women likes that kind of masculine talk.

 

[Davenport]

I wonder if he is still single..... but I guess some women likes that kind of masculine talk.

I didn't talk that way to her. I did't tell her she was a moocher, nor did I give that reason when I broke up with her. When we first went out, more like friends than dating, she offered to pay her share. After we started dating, she expected me to pay. After a few hints, and she didn't catch the hints, I broke it off with her.

Women need to stop trying to get a free lunch using obsolete social standards from when men worked and women stayed home.

 

[toinena]

I didn't talk that way to her. I did't tell her she was a moocher, nor did I give that reason when I broke up with her. When we first went out, more like friends than dating, she offered to pay her share. After we started dating, she expected me to pay. After a few hints, and she didn't catch the hints, I broke it off with her.

Women need to stop trying to get a free lunch using obsolete social standards from when men worked and women stayed home.

Would you have preferred a meek woman that stays at home that you could treat, or are you looking for a free lunch yourself?

 

[melita916]

I say whoever does the asking pays.

Now, once in a relationship, I say take turns paying unless finances are tight.

Or! Get creative and have dates that don’t require lots of money. Go to the park. Walk a trail. I’m sure each city holds functions that are free to the public.

 

[CharliRenee]

I wonder if he is still single..... but I guess some women likes that kind of masculine talk.

Maybe, hahaha.

 

[PennEd]

Old fashioned here. Dude pays.

If you end up married, matters not as all money is each others.

 

[Davenport]

Would you have preferred a meek woman that stays at home that you could treat, or are you looking for a free lunch yourself?

Thanks to man-hating feminists and stupid other people sabotaging society, it's economically impossible for the vast majority of men to support a family with a stay-at-home wife. Men's wages are lower today than they were 30 years ago, even though life is more expensive, and technology should have multiplied everyone's wealth.

If women pays half, then a man effectively pays for every lunch he eats.

Get a job and buy your own food, woman.

 

[Davenport]

Old fashioned here. Dude pays.

That's not old fashioned. That's stupid. Why would you pay for every date when women have jobs?

 

[preacher4truth]

I didn't talk that way to her. I did't tell her she was a moocher, nor did I give that reason when I broke up with her. When we first went out, more like friends than dating, she offered to pay her share. After we started dating, she expected me to pay. After a few hints, and she didn't catch the hints, I broke it off with her.

Women need to stop trying to get a free lunch using obsolete social standards from when men worked and women stayed home.

Women date you? Wow!

 

[Davenport]

Women date you? Wow!

It helps that I'm not a moron.

 

[melita916]

I’m not all that knowledgeable. Both of my parents worked for a time. Then my mom decided to stay home, so dad was the only income. The Lord is faithful. We had everything we needed plus a little more.

Now I’m a child of the 80s, so things may have been different. My parents didn’t have high paying jobs, but we always saw God’s faithfulness

 

[RodB65]

Get a job and buy your own food, woman.

I guess there's just not enough Wilma's for all the Fred's in this world.

 

[MariusAlexander]

no one pays, here in Texas there's a few places that have special platters that if you finish the whole thing you get it free. Comes with all the fixins too.. Two hungry people can make easy work of something like that, team effort and all.

 

[Davenport]

Now I’m a child of the 80s, so things may have been different. My parents didn’t have high paying jobs, but we always saw God’s faithfulness

Men make less today than they did in the 80s, and the cost of living is higher. These days, practically every family with kids receive some form of welfare, unless both spouses work.

So, the choice for the modern women is get a job, or live on welfare. "Old fashioned" isn't an option except in the delusions of ignorant people.

 

[toinena]

Thanks to man-hating feminists and stupid other people sabotaging society, it's economically impossible for the vast majority of men to support a family with a stay-at-home wife. Men's wages are lower today than they were 30 years ago, even though life is more expensive, and technology should have multiplied everyone's wealth.

If women pays half, then a man effectively pays for every lunch he eats.

Get a job and buy your own food, woman.

Thank you. I do earn enough to buy my own food, and I do pay my way....

 

[Jennie-Mae]

That's not old fashioned. That's stupid. Why would you pay for every date when women have jobs?

A real man is what making a date happen. You ain’t no lady so you ain’t gonna get this, but I’m telling you anyway.

Whenever a gentleman invites a lady to a date, the lady will be flattered if she likes him. Whenever he’s paying, opening the doors, pulling out her chair, she’ll feel safe and protected and cared for. And you know what? That feels so good. Try that the next time you’re interacting with a lady.