WHY BUY THE COW WHEN YOU GET THE MILK FOR FREE?

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Aug 26, 2018
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I see it as a kind of a Catch 22.

As singles, we struggle with the desire for sex, but no outlet. However, many of us cling to the hope of a POSSIBLE solution someday, no matter how dim it might seem.

However, even if we get married, we might have an outlet--for a while--but what if that changes and then there is NO outlet anymore, and NO hope, not even the dim possibility, of ever having another one? (Except for the very morbid, who might wish their spouse would pass away so that they can look for another.)

Either way, most of us eventually have to face the unpleasant task of trying to ignore or shelve our desires, whether sooner or later, and whether married or not.
That’s why when you marry, you look for someone that is just as invested in the marriage. Working on the relationship everyday to ensure evil does not seep in (pornography, adultery, etc).
As for all your scenarios about all the tragic things that can happen to your spouse that can prevent someone from having sex, it is the empathy and the love you have for them and God, that will keep you for cheating. It they were good to you the entire relationship it would be extremely shallow and selfish not to keep your vows.
 

Oncefallen

Idiot in Chief
Staff member
Jan 15, 2011
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Yes we do, and there are many more of us than what is widely believed. :cool:
Yep, there are. We have an old couple at my church that celebrated their 67th anniversary today. There are four generations of their family that attend together every week.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
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That’s why when you marry, you look for someone that is just as invested in the marriage. Working on the relationship everyday to ensure evil does not seep in (pornography, adultery, etc).
As for all your scenarios about all the tragic things that can happen to your spouse that can prevent someone from having sex, it is the empathy and the love you have for them and God, that will keep you for cheating. It they were good to you the entire relationship it would be extremely shallow and selfish not to keep your vows.
I agree wholeheartedly with your point of view that was very well written.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
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When I was in the Air Force, in Texas, we had to exercise and run in uniform with combat boots. The above comersal looked like a good idea to me for washing clothes, uh, not! Yeah, I really sliced up a bar of irish spring and threw the slices in the machine with my clothes. They didn't even disolve.
I did quite a bit of PT too serving with the 101st Airborne Division in Fort Campbell, KY. I have been to Lackland AFB, TX. Very hot place.
 

Jewel5712

Well-known member
Jun 22, 2018
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Yep, there are. We have an old couple at my church that celebrated their 67th anniversary today. There are four generations of their family that attend together every week.
I only know of 5 regulars on here that are single men..others MIGHT be but i dont know bout them..
 
Dec 16, 2012
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Im trying to say would people get married SOONER if waiting for sex..not saying theyd never get married either way :)
Ok let's actually address the main OP question;

Marriage is a holy sacrament entered into under the covenant of the Lord. Using this precise approach of having standards, using your instinct, going by God's word, it would be most obvious to discern whether a person is supposedly making what is a essentially a false commitment for their own perverse agenda. Any potential relationship made formal for this reason only is bound to fail. It's under a false guise. You don't rush to the altar because of your flesh. You decide together you're making a lifetime commitment to the person who, according to God's will, is the right person for you to take a lifetime journey together.
 

Jewel5712

Well-known member
Jun 22, 2018
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Ok let's actually address the main OP question;

Marriage is a holy sacrament entered into under the covenant of the Lord. Using this precise approach of having standards, using your instinct, going by God's word, it would be most obvious to discern whether a person is supposedly making what is a essentially a false commitment for their own perverse agenda. Any potential relationship made formal for this reason only is bound to fail. It's under a false guise. You don't rush to the altar because of your flesh. You decide together you're making a lifetime commitment to the person who, according to God's will, is the right person for you to take a lifetime journey together.
Doesnt mean theyll stay "pure" in that relationship for years before getting to the alter..like i said..christians as well as non fall sexually ecen in a commited spiritual relationship..if you love someone..its NATURAL to want to be with them physically as well..
 

Jewel5712

Well-known member
Jun 22, 2018
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Ok let's actually address the main OP question;

Marriage is a holy sacrament entered into under the covenant of the Lord. Using this precise approach of having standards, using your instinct, going by God's word, it would be most obvious to discern whether a person is supposedly making what is a essentially a false commitment for their own perverse agenda. Any potential relationship made formal for this reason only is bound to fail. It's under a false guise. You don't rush to the altar because of your flesh. You decide together you're making a lifetime commitment to the person who, according to God's will, is the right person for you to take a lifetime journey together.
Ate you married or had a serious relationship? (Without me going to your profile to look)..curious
 
Dec 16, 2012
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Doesnt mean theyll stay "pure" in that relationship for years before getting to the alter..like i said..christians as well as non fall sexually ecen in a commited spiritual relationship..if you love someone..its NATURAL to want to be with them physically as well..
It's not a matter of 'falling' or 'failing'. "Whoops I'm in a supposed committed spiritual relationship but i just found myself being totally unbiblical, however did that happen!" In such a scenario, a person is not only not committed at all to the good of the other person, they are not committed to Christ. A person who is of such a mindset and chooses not to exercise self control has their own issues to work out within themselves with the Lord before they're even ready to begin to think about involving another person in such a holy union.

When you're a christian, you're a believer and you make a commitment to Christ. You save yourself for marriage. Sex before marriage is about selfishness and in your original post this was spelled out aptly in the description. True love always waits, meaning intimacy is saved for marriage exclusively. That's biblical. If you're going to rush to the altar in order to deal with your flesh, you have no comprehension, reverence or respect for the sanctity of marriage, for what it means to be taking someone's hand in marriage under God's will whatsoever.

To use your own words "love", "committed" &"spiritual" in combination with your suggested scenario is the exact opposite of what a person who is only interested in walking in Christs path would do. We are taught get to know those interested in Christ above all things, not rushing to the altar to deal with an aspect of their flesh - this totally flies in the face of and is a massive contradiction to everything we are taught to be, get involved with and follow biblically.
 

Jewel5712

Well-known member
Jun 22, 2018
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It's not a matter of 'falling' or 'failing'. "Whoops I'm in a supposed committed spiritual relationship but i just found myself being totally unbiblical, however did that happen!" In such a scenario, a person is not only not committed at all to the good of the other person, they are not committed to Christ. A person who is of such a mindset and chooses not to exercise self control has their own issues to work out within themselves with the Lord before they're even ready to begin to think about involving another person in such a holy union.

When you're a christian, you're a believer and you make a commitment to Christ. You save yourself for marriage. Sex before marriage is about selfishness and in your original post this was spelled out aptly in the description. True love always waits, meaning intimacy is saved for marriage exclusively. That's biblical. If you're going to rush to the altar in order to deal with your flesh, you have no comprehension, reverence or respect for the sanctity of marriage, for what it means to be taking someone's hand in marriage under God's will whatsoever.

To use your own words "love", "committed" &"spiritual" in combination with your suggested scenario is the exact opposite of what a person who is only interested in walking in Christs path would do. We are taught get to know those interested in Christ above all things, not rushing to the altar to deal with an aspect of their flesh - this totally flies in the face of and is a massive contradiction to everything we are taught to be, get involved with and follow biblically.
Well..you have your opinion but sounds a bit "sheltered" to whats around you in society..and even in the church..we all know what the Bible says about it but like we ALL know..KNOWING the Bible and LIVING it are 2 different things..we ALL get tempted and many fall into that temptation..I PERSONALLY am young n able to have a lot of good sex yet so i hope NOT to dally with the engagement etc..at my age people SHOULD know what theyre about..what theyre looking for n need in a relationship..as do i..
 
Dec 16, 2012
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Well..you have your opinion but sounds a bit "sheltered" to whats around you in society..and even in the church..we all know what the Bible says about it but like we ALL know..KNOWING the Bible and LIVING it are 2 different things
That's precisely what the bible teaches against. It's got nothing to do with being 'sheltered' and everything to do with making an honest commitment to Christ. As Christians we are called not to conform to the world as society changes. We are called to make a firm commitment to Christ in all our actions. Yes they are two different things but one does not negate the other. The bible is not there just for reading, it's our word, our guide for life, for every breath we take and it's to be taken extremely seriously.

I PERSONALLY am young n able to have a lot of good sex yet so i hope NOT to dally with the engagement etc
This approach, this precise mindset is exactly what I addressed in my response. If this is all your interested in, you're not putting Christ first, you have no understanding and respect for marriage and if you truly wanted the best for your future partner in life, if you were truly interested in living for Christ, you would not be intimate with them before marriage. You would not be waving this attitude of justification under their nose. A person like yourself, who is of such a mindset and chooses actively not to exercise self control has their own issues to work out within themselves with the Lord before they're even ready to begin to think about involving another person in such a holy union. Any supposed union based on such selfishness is not founded in Godly principles nor is it of His will and is predestined for total failure.
 

Jewel5712

Well-known member
Jun 22, 2018
4,091
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That's precisely what the bible teaches against. It's got nothing to do with being 'sheltered' and everything to do with making an honest commitment to Christ. As Christians we are called not to conform to the world as society changes. We are called to make a firm commitment to Christ in all our actions. Yes they are two different things but one does not negate the other. The bible is not there just for reading, it's our word, our guide for life, for every breath we take and it's to be taken extremely seriously.



This approach, this precise mindset is exactly what I addressed in my response. If this is all your interested in, you're not putting Christ first, you have no understanding and respect for marriage and if you truly wanted the best for your future partner in life, if you were truly interested in living for Christ, you would not be intimate with them before marriage. You would not be waving this attitude of justification under their nose. A person like yourself, who is of such a mindset and chooses actively not to exercise self control has their own issues to work out within themselves with the Lord before they're even ready to begin to think about involving another person in such a holy union. Any supposed union based on such selfishness is not founded in Godly principles nor is it of His will and is predestined for total failure.
Did you not read my reply because if you didnt you wouldnt be addressing the same things i replied to...again..we all KNOW what the Bible says..thats NOT the question of the OP so YOU as a PERSON have not responded but quoted a bible lesson thats kinda over kill..you also failed to answer my question regarding if youre married or ever had a serious bf..n i AM aware that dating in different countries are VERY DIFFERENT and i AM talking bout CHRISTIAN relationships.. No more Bible lessons plese..i got it the 1st time..AND the 2nd time... Lol
 

melita916

Senior Member
Aug 12, 2011
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thanks to the Holy Spirit and having the word of God, we are able to know right from wrong. we know what the Lord wants. we walk in His power. His power lives IN us.

the flesh gets in the way. the enemy gets in the way. but the Word says we have the spirit of self control. resist temptation. the enemy will flee.

there are times we mess up. God is faithful and just to forgive us our sins. but repentance brings change.

just because it (sex outside of marriage) happens among christians and non christians doesn't make it right.

and yes. there are still brothers and sisters who are waiting until marriage - some as virgins, and some with a past.