WHY BUY THE COW WHEN YOU GET THE MILK FOR FREE?

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Jewel5712

Well-known member
Jun 22, 2018
4,091
2,275
113
#22
If not, Biblical as well.

1 Thessalonians 4:3-5
“For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, not in the passion of lust like the Gentiles who do not know God….”​
No..premarital sex is not biblical but a reality in todays society with both christians n non like i said..some will admit it..some wont..
 

Mel85

Daughter of the True King
Mar 28, 2018
10,910
6,897
113
#23
No..premarital sex is not biblical but a reality in todays society with both christians n non like i said..some will admit it..some wont..
I know, and I don’t want to push this thread into a BDF thread lol.
 

calibob

Sinner saved by grace
May 29, 2018
8,268
5,516
113
Anaheim, Cali.
#24
This could open a whole can of worms, Like what is marriage? Is it valid without an ordained minister? Or just in an office between lawers by proxy? Is it valid by captian at sea?
 

Noose

Senior Member
Apr 18, 2016
5,096
932
113
#25
Jesus said His yoke is not burdensome, satan through men (society/church) has turned everything around and made a tradition about everything making everything burdensome.

What is marriage? marriage simply is when a man and a woman leave their parents and are enjoined by LOVE for one another when they AGREE to be together and God being their witness in this AGREEMENT. It doesn't require family/societal/church/Government approval for it to be a marriage.

Giving Ceasar what belongs to Ceasar only helps our marriage in certain ways- like family approval or Government approval or Church approval only help in recognition as husband and wife but doesn't define marriage. We must also be careful that we offer Ceasar must not contravene God's law. For instance, church marriages nowadays is all about vows yet Jesus says we should not take oaths or vows because we can not control the future. This always ruffles a lot feathers because their perception of marriage is something else but i'll still go in;

Matt 5:33 “Again, you have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘Do not break your oath, but fulfill to the Lord the vows you have made.’ 34But I tell you, do not swear an oath at all: either by heaven, for it is God’s throne; 35or by the earth, for it is his footstool; or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the Great King. 36And do not swear by your head, for you cannot make even one hair white or black. 37All you need to say is simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’; anything beyond this comes from the evil one.

This is how satan has a choke hold over many; you make vows over things you don't have control over and that is sin. Be humble and make things simple and remember the promise- the Lords yoke is not burdensome.

Another area that the church has turned into men's tradition is sexual sin/immorality. Hint; it is not what many think. I will not discuss this lest someone accuse me of bringing BDF into the singles section.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,718
9,649
113
#26
Quote for the day: "Marrying for sex is like buying a 747 jet to get the free packs of peanuts."

In other words, it ain't worth the price you pay for it.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,718
9,649
113
#27
what do I think? meh not my problem. thats what i think
all i know is which ever way people go. they doing much better then I ever well.
yeah that is so so helpful....
not.
Okay. We get the point. Thank you. We understand you are very bitter about man/woman relationships. You have made that VERY clear.

In fact you have spent so much time and so many posts making that clear, that it has become the only thing we know about you.

Oh wait... we know that you drive a truck. Well, you used to drive a truck. That's one other thing we know about you.

So we know two things about you. You used to drive a truck and you are very bitter about any topic that has anything to do with romance, marriage, sex or anything between a man and woman.

Can you please move on to a different topic now? Just because somebody peed in your cheerios does not mean you have to pee in everybody else's cereal bowl every single time any relationship topic comes up.
 

Adstar

Senior Member
Jul 24, 2016
7,600
3,624
113
#28
just wondered if they had to wait for sex til married if they wouldve been married in a year other than "dating" for years...What do YOU think?
There would be a lot more early marriages if people did not engage in pre-marital sex..



No..premarital sex is not biblical but a reality in todays society with both christians n non like i said..some will admit it..some wont..
That's making the allogation that any Christian who says they waited for marriage before engaging in sex is a liar...
 

Tommy379

Notorious Member
Jan 12, 2016
7,589
1,153
113
#29
Quote for the day: "Marrying for sex is like buying a 747 jet to get the free packs of peanuts."

In other words, it ain't worth the price you pay for it.
Why bother getting married then?
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
16,700
5,609
113
#30
Why bother getting married then?
It's a complex dilemma, for sure.

The problem is, this sets up the scenario that people just get married because of sex.

So in other words, "If sex wasn't involved, I'd have no interest in marrying you."

I understand, from some of your posts, that you might not have an issue with a woman treating you like a pof meat, but is that how everyone should view marriage? "I want to get married in order to have sex." I've often wondered if the church has almost inadvertently promoted this idea in the back of many people's heads, because EVERY person who talks about dealing with sexual temptation is told to just get married.

I understand the advice is Biblical (I Cor. 7:9), but what happens when marriage is broken down to nothing more than sex?

As I get older and witness the struggles of the marriages around me, I've also come to the conclusion that at some point, we are all forced to learn to put our desire for sex on the shelf, married or not.

I could be wrong, but marriage is not an end-all be-all to sexual temptation. What happens when your spouse gets pregnant or sick, or doesn't want to have sex, or can't? What if you marry someone who is only concerned about their own sexual interests and has no interest in what you yourself might want or think you need?

And what if, God forbid, your spouse develops something like Alzheimer's, and no longer knows who you are, let alone the thought of wanting to have sex with you, and you have a good 20 years left to live?

The Bible apparently does not allow one to divorce their spouse and seek another Body For Sexual Gratification (if marriage is only about sex, this is what marriage really is) because of this or any other scenario that could happen (I have heard some try to argue that the loss of sexual fulfillment can be classified as marital desertion, but I don't think that's what the Bible meant.)

I'm not trying to say we shouldn't get married because of the zillion things that could go wrong.

Rather, I'm saying that it seems God has it deemed in this life that most everyone has to face dealing with their sexuality in a God-approved manner at one time and in one way or the other, whether married or not.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,718
9,649
113
#31
I could be wrong, but marriage is not an end-all be-all to sexual temptation. What happens when your spouse gets pregnant or sick, or doesn't want to have sex, or can't? What if you marry someone who is only concerned about their own sexual interests and has no interest in what you yourself might want or think you need?
Apparently getting married does not cure all temptation. If it did, there would be no such thing as adultery.
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
16,700
5,609
113
#32
Apparently getting married does not cure all temptation. If it did, there would be no such thing as adultery.
Not to mention the zillion and one threads in the family forum in which married people are being passed up by their spouses so that they can view porn instead.
 

Tommy379

Notorious Member
Jan 12, 2016
7,589
1,153
113
#33
It's a complex dilemma, for sure.

The problem is, this sets up the scenario that people just get married because of sex.

So in other words, "If sex wasn't involved, I'd have no interest in marrying you."

I understand, from some of your posts, that you might not have an issue with a woman treating you like a pof meat, but is that how everyone should view marriage? "I want to get married in order to have sex." I've often wondered if the church has almost inadvertently promoted this idea in the back of many people's heads, because EVERY person who talks about dealing with sexual temptation is told to just get married.

I understand the advice is Biblical (I Cor. 7:9), but what happens when marriage is broken down to nothing more than sex?

As I get older and witness the struggles of the marriages around me, I've also come to the conclusion that at some point, we are all forced to learn to put our desire for sex on the shelf, married or not.

I could be wrong, but marriage is not an end-all be-all to sexual temptation. What happens when your spouse gets pregnant or sick, or doesn't want to have sex, or can't? What if you marry someone who is only concerned about their own sexual interests and has no interest in what you yourself might want or think you need?

And what if, God forbid, your spouse develops something like Alzheimer's, and no longer knows who you are, let alone the thought of wanting to have sex with you, and you have a good 20 years left to live?

The Bible apparently does not allow one to divorce their spouse and seek another Body For Sexual Gratification (if marriage is only about sex, this is what marriage really is) because of this or any other scenario that could happen (I have heard some try to argue that the loss of sexual fulfillment can be classified as marital desertion, but I don't think that's what the Bible meant.)

I'm not trying to say we shouldn't get married because of the zillion things that could go wrong.

Rather, I'm saying that it seems God has it deemed in this life that most everyone has to face dealing with their sexuality in a God-approved manner at one time and in one way or the other, whether married or not.
I will marry her because I love her, but if sex is not part of the equation, I can still love her if we are not married.
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
16,700
5,609
113
#34
I will marry her because I love her, but if sex is not part of the equation, I can still love her if we are not married.
What are you going to do if a day arrives when your spouse can't/doesn't want to have sex anymore?
 

Jewel5712

Well-known member
Jun 22, 2018
4,091
2,275
113
#36
Apparently getting married does not cure all temptation. If it did, there would be no such thing as adultery.
I dont believe adultury is always based on sex but it can be..
 

Jewel5712

Well-known member
Jun 22, 2018
4,091
2,275
113
#37
There would be a lot more early marriages if people did not engage in pre-marital sex..





That's making the allogation that any Christian who says they waited for marriage before engaging in sex is a liar...
Disagree on your last comment
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
16,700
5,609
113
#38
Why bother getting married then?
What are you going to do if a day arrives when your spouse can't/doesn't want to have sex anymore?
Love her anyways. Cause I love her. It's what I do.
I see it as a kind of a Catch 22.

As singles, we struggle with the desire for sex, but no outlet. However, many of us cling to the hope of a POSSIBLE solution someday, no matter how dim it might seem.

However, even if we get married, we might have an outlet--for a while--but what if that changes and then there is NO outlet anymore, and NO hope, not even the dim possibility, of ever having another one? (Except for the very morbid, who might wish their spouse would pass away so that they can look for another.)

Either way, most of us eventually have to face the unpleasant task of trying to ignore or shelve our desires, whether sooner or later, and whether married or not.
 

Jewel5712

Well-known member
Jun 22, 2018
4,091
2,275
113
#39
It's a complex dilemma, for sure.

The problem is, this sets up the scenario that people just get married because of sex.

So in other words, "If sex wasn't involved, I'd have no interest in marrying you."

I understand, from some of your posts, that you might not have an issue with a woman treating you like a pof meat, but is that how everyone should view marriage? "I want to get married in order to have sex." I've often wondered if the church has almost inadvertently promoted this idea in the back of many people's heads, because EVERY person who talks about dealing with sexual temptation is told to just get married.

I understand the advice is Biblical (I Cor. 7:9), but what happens when marriage is broken down to nothing more than sex?

As I get older and witness the struggles of the marriages around me, I've also come to the conclusion that at some point, we are all forced to learn to put our desire for sex on the shelf, married or not.

I could be wrong, but marriage is not an end-all be-all to sexual temptation. What happens when your spouse gets pregnant or sick, or doesn't want to have sex, or can't? What if you marry someone who is only concerned about their own sexual interests and has no interest in what you yourself might want or think you need?

And what if, God forbid, your spouse develops something like Alzheimer's, and no longer knows who you are, let alone the thought of wanting to have sex with you, and you have a good 20 years left to live?

The Bible apparently does not allow one to divorce their spouse and seek another Body For Sexual Gratification (if marriage is only about sex, this is what marriage really is) because of this or any other scenario that could happen (I have heard some try to argue that the loss of sexual fulfillment can be classified as marital desertion, but I don't think that's what the Bible meant.)

I'm not trying to say we shouldn't get married because of the zillion things that could go wrong.

Rather, I'm saying that it seems God has it deemed in this life that most everyone has to face dealing with their sexuality in a God-approved manner at one time and in one way or the other, whether married or not.
Im trying to say would people get married SOONER if waiting for sex..not saying theyd never get married either way :)
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
16,700
5,609
113
#40
Im trying to say would people get married SOONER if waiting for sex..not saying theyd never get married either way :)
My reply was directed specifically as an answer to Tommy's post, not as an answer to the general topic of the thread.

I tend to get caught up with "conversations" within the threads, and not just the topic question itself.