Hospice?

[keep_on_smiling]

Praying for you and your family during this extremely difficult time. My heart goes out to you as there really isn’t anything I can say to make you feel better.

I pray for strength and encouragement for each of you. Know that the Lord loves you all and He can and will help you all through it, even your dear grandma. 💗

 

[OstrichSmiling]

Been awhile since LM updated her thread. Has anyone heard from her via private messaging? Sending prayers to her and her family still.

 

[blue_ladybug]

I believe she had said that her family member was close to going to be with the Lord..

 

[OstrichSmiling]

Yes, I know. I'm just wondering if anyone has heard an update since then? It is very emotionally draining to share with a terminal family member who is in Hospice. I was awake for three days at the bedside of my family member who was in Hospice. And a week with another. My body shut me down for moments at a time because the body needs rest, but I was there every moment so as not to learn they had left while I slept.
It's draining, and yet knowing they're at peace makes the healing happen when it is time. Realizing you'll never see them again in this life as you watch them leave it over a long period of time unconscious and succumbing to their disease is a death of sorts in itself for those who are there.

 

[OneFaith]

Hospice is for those who are dying. There is no more treatment for them other than to make them comfortable. For example, they will not see a dietitian to make sure they are eating properly. Matter of fact they don't even encourage them to eat at all if they don't want to. There is no emergency resuscitation, there is no trying to save their life.

Someone should not be put in hospice if their doctor is not convinced that they will die within the next month or so. Some hospice patients go in and out of dementia. At times when they are fully aware they may protest being there (they are really protesting dying). If they are deemed not of sound mind and body by the court, the court could issue a family member the right to make their loved one's medical decisions for them.

My biological dad lost his toe due to diabetes. Soon after they also had to amputate his foot. Then diabetes took his leg. After that and being on dialysis, cause his kidneys no longer functioned on their own, he was put into hospice. He started losing awareness. I think maybe God gives them this stage when dying, as mercy to not know what's happening.

My step dad had regular visits from a hospice nurse. My biological mom wanted him to go to a nursing home, he didn't want to. The nurse said he was still capable of making his own decisions, so he didn't go. But a few months later he lost awareness- not knowing who he was or who family was. My step brother took him into his home instead of hospice, and a hospice nurse visited him there often until he passed.

 

[Mel85]

Praying for you and your family sweet sister ❤️

 

[Zmouth]

From personal experience with my dad, hospice can mean different things yet the exact service of hospice would be told to the patient when the order for hospice is written by the treating doctor.

Hospice is only ordered when the patient has a medical condition which there is no known treatment or cure, and therefore the condition is untreatable which means there is no necessity to remain in the hospital. (The doctor has the final say in whether a patient is discharged or remains admitted to the hospital) Depending upon the patient's insurance, they will only pay for a specific number of days at which time the doctor would be required to discharge the patient if there was no medical necessity for their remaining.

While I understand that we all feel that it is a medical necessity, yet when a person's medical condition has no cure, or known or reasonable treatment then there is no medical necessity except for the pain management provided to the terminal person as their medical condition runs it course. Since pain management doesn't require the level of medical service provided by a hospital, the patient would be discharged by the hospital after they had reached the maximum number of days of hospitalization provided for by their insurance provider.

Since the patient could be admitted to a nursing home or similar type facility provided they are insured for care in that type of facility, otherwise the terminal patient's only choice is to their own home, or other care giver which usually would be another family member.
Caring for a terminal patient is extremely hard, and while the doctor can say she is expected to live for 4 months, yet there is a difference between being alive and living.

What can you do to prepare yourself? One, I think if possible one needs to lay the hands on their loved one and ask (pray) the LORD to restore (heal) their loved one physically according to his will, understanding that death, or rather the end of our animated flesh is the promise of his word. In simple words we have to leave here to get up there, and the promise is that up there we are renewed in our soul when we are given a new vessel of flesh to dwell within when our soul manifests in a new body of flesh in the kingdom of Heaven.

"Yea, though he live a thousand years twice told, yet hath he seen no good: ..."

Read John 6:63 and consider the following.

15 See then that ye walk circumspectly, not as fools, but as wise,
16 Redeeming the time, because the days are evil.
17 Wherefore be ye not unwise, but understanding what the will of the Lord is.
Ephesians 5

 

[LittleMermaid]

I just thought I would update this thread. My grandma passed away on Monday, August 6. She was three weeks shy of turning 85.
Thank you all for all the advice, prayers, and sweet friendships. Love you all.

 

[zeroturbulence]

I just thought I would update this thread. My grandma passed away on Monday, August 6. She was three weeks shy of turning 85.
Thank you all for all the advice, prayers, and sweet friendships. Love you all.

Oh, so sorry, LM. She's in a better place now.

 

[Papou]

Hey guys. So as some of ya'll know already my grandma has pancreatic cancer. In March she was diagnosed. The odd thing is that they told us 6-12 months back then. Then a couple of weeks ago she needed to be checked and they told us that the cancer has spread to her liver. So now she has about 4 months left.

I love my grandma. My dad wasn't around much and she helped raise my brother and I. She is like a parent to me. I have never lost anyone close to me...so I don't really know how to take it.

Lately she has been very sick. She rocks back and forth and we think she may be losing her mind slowly. Sometimes she says odd things like "I'm 15...take me to my parents house" or "Are the dogs going to school in the bus?" She lives with my aunt but she works during the day. Thank God that right now it's summer and my teen cousins can watch her during the day.

What is difficult is getting her pain meds. She is on morphine. It's hard to get it refilled. The doctors recommended we put her in hospice. But there are a few problems and questions that I have about hospice.

So about 2 years ago my grandmother's oldest sister was put in hospice by her daughter. Within a few weeks of being put in it...she passed away. So now my grandma thinks that hospice is only there to kill you. She thinks that it's cruel for any daughter/son to put their parent in hospice. She is very upset with her niece and doesn't talk to her. She literally told this niece that she killed her own mother (my grandma's sister). So now that the docs tell us to put her in hospice...she says "no way!" But it's getting harder for us to take care of her. We are lost. And we don't want her to find out if we do put her in it because she will hate us. And we don't want her to go hating us.

So my questions are...
What exactly is hospice?
If she gets sick with something like the flu, will they treat the flu if she's in hospice? We are under the impression that they do not treat anything but just give pain meds in hospice.
For those that have lost loved ones...what is that like? Is there anything I need to do before? Or anything I can do to prepare myself for this?

At the hospice, they will take care of her every minute. I recommend it 100% based on similar experiences. My sister in law went to an hospice and she was happy to finish her days there. She had a lot of visits and enjoyed all the attention from the nurses and doctors.