I will never be in a relationship and it makes me sad

[joefizz]

people see me all the time when i go out, i also had facebook with profile picture and several dating sites, and i posted my face on other websites. no woman ever "fall madly in love with me", even in threads where everyone got a comment (selfie thread) i got ignored. and i got several bad comments about my looks on internet. the worst comment was when one women told me that if she looked like me should would never go out.



yes and i am happy about god, but now we are talking about humans. why i care about what humans think about me is rather eazy, because i want to have friends and a wife just like many other wants. god can not force anyone to like me, it has to be people themself that have to accept me for who i am.



i am not negative like this all the time, everyone is complaining sometimes. girls with bad attitude have husbands, friends, boyfriends, how strange. it does not matter even if i have the best attitude possible, my flaws will still be there. go and read my first post again and be honest, why would anyone want a guy with that many and severe flaws? people feel ashamed to be with me, they dont want me with them, i am draging down their social status.

i tried everything to change my flaws, but nothing can be fixed.



meh, some say otherwise. you have not meet right one i think. we are all different and want different things.



well i am still not your brother, we are different persons, maybe i am even worse than him. i think you are being a little bit to critical of your brother, he can not be that bad if he has a gf. i meet people all the time, but nobody is intrested in a guy who is so ugly that they get repulsed by looking at me + i have no social skills so what do i have to offer? people should be with me because they feel sorry for me? nah.




i can not make a woman smile and laugh, i am boring and weird. and even if can do it it does not mean she wants to be friends or have me as a husband, there is other guys than me, almost all guys are better than me so why choice me.

hard to smile when i looked pissed off in a natural way, its how my face is, nothing i can change even thought i do smile alot.

women are shallow, almost all guys who are ugly, boring, geeks etc are alone and many of them will remain so. a guy with not much money, no cool clothes and non-attractive face and body will never be a liked as a guy with much money, cool clothtes and a hot body and face, thats a fact. why would a woman choose me when she choose a hot funny guy with 100s friends and much money? what i am saying is common sense.


i am not alone because of "attitude" but beccause i am very ugly and boring.

i am serious, there is zero good things with me. i am useless for others.



because i see and listen to what women say. and i look at couples in the street, i never say a guy with my flaws with a gf. sometimes someone who is almost as bad as me can have a gf but they are rich or famous and its 1 in thousand chance its happen so its pointless for me to have hopes to meet a woman. i can not be loved, its not possible for a woman to fall in love with me.

what woman want a guy who is poor, very ugly, boring as heck? i am introvert too btw. yeah a bit of the first, i can not live up to that, thats the problem. ofcouse i must live up to what others wants, why would they want someone they dont find intresting? woman do not marry guys just because the guy is god fearing, women also want guys to have deecent looks, good job, many friends, funny personality etc.

yes god can do anything that does not mean he will do anything, god could destoy hell and let everyone go to heaven, will he do that, nope. god do what he wants, he is in charge, i can ask him for a wife and friends, will he do it? perhaps no, perhaps yes. no where in the bible does it say that getting friends and a wife is some sort of "right" and that it will happen for everyone.

You sound like...me, 5 to 10 years ago,you sound like a person in a dark pit of despair and doubt,when you take out the "what ifs" and start thinking "I can" or "I will","things change" because you are probably "trying too hard" to be loved,love someone,be likeable or like someone,I did the same,and found out it made me at times "an obnoxious clown","a fall guy" "impulsive" and "easily devoid of emotion" and "irritable and unsociable".
Try "being you" without a phony smile or trying to please others so intensely it really can "lead you to have more friends" or "find someone you may come to love" or "someone who comes to love you".

 

[joefizz]

Quote for the day: "It's alright to sit on your pity-pot once in a while. Just be sure you flush when you get up."

So jovanovic, we get it. You are determined to be depressed about yourself. Far be it from us to try to force you to be optimistic. It is time to cut the cable and let you sail on through your Sea of Despair. Bon voyage.

When you get tired of self pity we will be here, but right now there is nothing we can do for you. You are just too stubbornly clinging to your pity.

Nah I think I get what's going on with him it's "not easy" to "let happiness and joy in" when you are "feeling miserable".

 

[joefizz]

people see me all the time when i go out, i also had facebook with profile picture and several dating sites, and i posted my face on other websites. no woman ever "fall madly in love with me", even in threads where everyone got a comment (selfie thread) i got ignored. and i got several bad comments about my looks on internet. the worst comment was when one women told me that if she looked like me should would never go out.



yes and i am happy about god, but now we are talking about humans. why i care about what humans think about me is rather eazy, because i want to have friends and a wife just like many other wants. god can not force anyone to like me, it has to be people themself that have to accept me for who i am.



i am not negative like this all the time, everyone is complaining sometimes. girls with bad attitude have husbands, friends, boyfriends, how strange. it does not matter even if i have the best attitude possible, my flaws will still be there. go and read my first post again and be honest, why would anyone want a guy with that many and severe flaws? people feel ashamed to be with me, they dont want me with them, i am draging down their social status.

i tried everything to change my flaws, but nothing can be fixed.



meh, some say otherwise. you have not meet right one i think. we are all different and want different things.



well i am still not your brother, we are different persons, maybe i am even worse than him. i think you are being a little bit to critical of your brother, he can not be that bad if he has a gf. i meet people all the time, but nobody is intrested in a guy who is so ugly that they get repulsed by looking at me + i have no social skills so what do i have to offer? people should be with me because they feel sorry for me? nah.




i can not make a woman smile and laugh, i am boring and weird. and even if can do it it does not mean she wants to be friends or have me as a husband, there is other guys than me, almost all guys are better than me so why choice me.

hard to smile when i looked pissed off in a natural way, its how my face is, nothing i can change even thought i do smile alot.

women are shallow, almost all guys who are ugly, boring, geeks etc are alone and many of them will remain so. a guy with not much money, no cool clothes and non-attractive face and body will never be a liked as a guy with much money, cool clothtes and a hot body and face, thats a fact. why would a woman choose me when she choose a hot funny guy with 100s friends and much money? what i am saying is common sense.


i am not alone because of "attitude" but beccause i am very ugly and boring.

i am serious, there is zero good things with me. i am useless for others.



because i see and listen to what women say. and i look at couples in the street, i never say a guy with my flaws with a gf. sometimes someone who is almost as bad as me can have a gf but they are rich or famous and its 1 in thousand chance its happen so its pointless for me to have hopes to meet a woman. i can not be loved, its not possible for a woman to fall in love with me.

what woman want a guy who is poor, very ugly, boring as heck? i am introvert too btw. yeah a bit of the first, i can not live up to that, thats the problem. ofcouse i must live up to what others wants, why would they want someone they dont find intresting? woman do not marry guys just because the guy is god fearing, women also want guys to have deecent looks, good job, many friends, funny personality etc.

yes god can do anything that does not mean he will do anything, god could destoy hell and let everyone go to heaven, will he do that, nope. god do what he wants, he is in charge, i can ask him for a wife and friends, will he do it? perhaps no, perhaps yes. no where in the bible does it say that getting friends and a wife is some sort of "right" and that it will happen for everyone.

Also boring and weird still comes by me naturally too but it's not as boring and weird as you might think sometimes "being boring" leads to "conversation" and sometimes "being weird" leads to "attention" in a good way,honestly if I told you what I do in a day you'd probably be bored to tears with me or think I'm the weirdest guy ever because my life is mostly "routine" and I break away from it typically here or in a video game or calling someone.

 

[Susanna]

Är du Svensk Jovanovic? Talar du Svenska? Jag provar lära mig det. Hoppas du mår bra, om inte hela tiden, så åtminstone ibland.

Hej så länge!

 

[jovanovic]

Är du Svensk Jovanovic? Talar du Svenska? Jag provar lära mig det. Hoppas du mår bra, om inte hela tiden, så åtminstone ibland.

Hej så länge!

Ja, jag är svensk och talar svenska. Din svenska är bra.

 

[Lighthearted]

I dont have any good qualites, thats the problem.

I can name a few right off the bat and I don't even know you...
#1 you're very open (to talk about yourself and your flaws)
#2 you're brave to open yourself to strangers and ask for help
#3 you seem literate, able to communicate, and you can spell
#4 from what you say, I see you would like to have a special person in your life

Here are some questions you can answer...
#1 A you a Christian? Do you love God?
#2 Are you kind hearted?
#3 Do you help others in need?
#4 Do you have patience?
#5 Do you have respect for other people?
#6 Are you slow to anger?
#7 Do you like to make others laugh?
#8 Do you have a job?
#9 Do you have any hobbies?
#10 is family important to you?

If you can answer yes to any of those things...well, you have good qualities.
Sure, looks can certainly play apart in attraction...but looks aren't everything. A man can be very good looking on the outside and be a total jerk and narcissist. There are things one can do to improve some of the things you listed...on the outside. What truly matters and what is more important and harder to change is whats on the inside.
I think you may be putting too much emphasis on the things that are important to people that you probably shouldn't be interested in anyway...

 

[Lighthearted]

why would anyone look past all those flaws? i know many people who are better than me and still no woman wants them either just because they have too many flaws themself.

women do not only want confidence, they also want the guy to have decent looks, lots of money, great job, many friends, perfect social skills, great body, a car etc, its way to much for me to live up too.

yeah...shallow women you shouldn't want anyway...!
most of the things you just listed are things money can buy...
what the women that would be honest and truly loving, make great wives, are the ones who want what money can't buy...and you probably won't find that until you are older and dating women your age...

 

[jovanovic]

I can name a few right off the bat and I don't even know you...
#1 you're very open (to talk about yourself and your flaws)
#2 you're brave to open yourself to strangers and ask for help
#3 you seem literate, able to communicate, and you can spell
#4 from what you say, I see you would like to have a special person in your life

Here are some questions you can answer...
#1 A you a Christian? Do you love God?
#2 Are you kind hearted?
#3 Do you help others in need?
#4 Do you have patience?
#5 Do you have respect for other people?
#6 Are you slow to anger?
#7 Do you like to make others laugh?
#8 Do you have a job?
#9 Do you have any hobbies?
#10 is family important to you?

If you can answer yes to any of those things...well, you have good qualities.
Sure, looks can certainly play apart in attraction...but looks aren't everything. A man can be very good looking on the outside and be a total jerk and narcissist. There are things one can do to improve some of the things you listed...on the outside. What truly matters and what is more important and harder to change is whats on the inside.
I think you may be putting too much emphasis on the things that are important to people that you probably shouldn't be interested in anyway...

yes i am a christian and i do love god.

kind hearted? i dont say nasty words to others, i give money to the poor, 2 times i let drifters sleep in my house, i give money to my sister so she can buy clothes, i am not a racist, i support women rights, when i see someone is roobed/attacked i try to help, i hold the doors to people, i wish everyone could repent and get salvation etc...is this enough to be called "kind hearted" and help others?

patience? i dont see the point in meeting a wife when i am 60 years old, its too late. i want to meet a wife when i am in good age.

yes i respect others, we are all different, i would never look down on somebody because of how that person look, what he/she does for a living etc.

i am never angry but sometimes i am sad..

i like to make jokes but nobody thinks that i am funny .

yes i have a job, but not much money . i also have my own house ..

i have alot of hobbies . but my biggest is icehockey, not something that many likes....and i am introvert.

family is VERY important...

my looks is so bad they it does play a big part! and i have a boring weird personality, this is why i have no hope.

i tried everything to improve, nothing is working.

 

[melita916]

OP, are you involved with a local congregation/ministry? I'm a shy introvert, but when I got involved with a ministry, it helped me interact with others.

we ALL have flaws, but God gives each of us something. I wear glasses and have crooked teeth, but dang it do I love singing and playing the violin. I'm funny and learn things quickly. do I have bad days? sure. but we don't face things alone. you have Holy Spirit dwelling in you! You are who God says you are. it's up to you whether or not you will believe what He says about you in His word. He says you are loved, chosen, talented, forgiven, etc etc etc! He has given you an identity. the devil does all he can to steal our identity, but he is defeated!

 

[Lighthearted]

yes i am a christian and i do love god.

kind hearted? i dont say nasty words to others, i give money to the poor, 2 times i let drifters sleep in my house, i give money to my sister so she can buy clothes, i am not a racist, i support women rights, when i see someone is roobed/attacked i try to help, i hold the doors to people, i wish everyone could repent and get salvation etc...is this enough to be called "kind hearted" and help others?

patience? i dont see the point in meeting a wife when i am 60 years old, its too late. i want to meet a wife when i am in good age.

yes i respect others, we are all different, i would never look down on somebody because of how that person look, what he/she does for a living etc.

i am never angry but sometimes i am sad..

i like to make jokes but nobody thinks that i am funny .

yes i have a job, but not much money . i also have my own house ..

i have alot of hobbies . but my biggest is icehockey, not something that many likes....and i am introvert.

family is VERY important...

my looks is so bad they it does play a big part! and i have a boring weird personality, this is why i have no hope.

i tried everything to improve, nothing is working.

for the most part you sound like an interesting guy...now if you could just tweak the negative and start being more positive and work on talking to people around you with a positive attitude, that would go a long way...

I will pray for you...I wish I could help more

 

[Susanna]

Ja, jag är svensk och talar svenska. Din svenska är bra.

Du talar jo Engelska hur bra som hälst. Det är nu väl inte sådär normalt att vara så bra på att tala Engelska i Sverige...eller hur? Så du har väl en typ utbildning med?

 

[Susanna]

Min mormor var från Göteborg, hon talade Svenska till mig när jag var barn, men så tappade jag språket...så jag måste lära det på nytt.

 

[jovanovic]

OP, are you involved with a local congregation/ministry? I'm a shy introvert, but when I got involved with a ministry, it helped me interact with others.

we ALL have flaws, but God gives each of us something. I wear glasses and have crooked teeth, but dang it do I love singing and playing the violin. I'm funny and learn things quickly. do I have bad days? sure. but we don't face things alone. you have Holy Spirit dwelling in you! You are who God says you are. it's up to you whether or not you will believe what He says about you in His word. He says you are loved, chosen, talented, forgiven, etc etc etc! He has given you an identity. the devil does all he can to steal our identity, but he is defeated!

yes i go to church every sunday.

you look very beautiful on your picture.

 

[jovanovic]

for the most part you sound like an interesting guy...now if you could just tweak the negative and start being more positive and work on talking to people around you with a positive attitude, that would go a long way...

I will pray for you...I wish I could help more

i am already positive when talking to others...it sure as heck is not helping. i have problem talking with people on internet too, i only had 2 internet friends on internet in my whole life and non of them where female.

thanks for your prayers, i will also pray for you.

 

[jovanovic]

Du talar jo Engelska hur bra som hälst. Det är nu väl inte sådär normalt att vara så bra på att tala Engelska i Sverige...eller hur? Så du har väl en typ utbildning med?

Nej, min engelska är usel faktiskt, fått mycket skit för den. Min accent är riktigt pinsam.

Jo, de flesta svenskar är mycket bra på engelska.

Jag har utbildning med datorer, men inte med språk.

 

[jovanovic]

Min mormor var från Göteborg, hon talade Svenska till mig när jag var barn, men så tappade jag språket...så jag måste lära det på nytt.

Oj Göteborg, varit där en gång, min buss krockade.

 

[zeroturbulence]

Min mormor var från Göteborg, hon talade Svenska till mig när jag var barn, men så tappade jag språket...så jag måste lära det på nytt.

You have a jag?!

 

[mar09]

Hi J,

I was searching for a verse in Proverbs when i came to this: it might interest u, or if these are things u already know... then it might be for another person=)!

By Grant Castleberry Originally posted October 24th, 2014.

My brother is in his final year as a college student at Texas A&M. I am writing this post for him and myriads of other young men like him—young, single men that I have conversations with almost daily about life and relationships. I know that God does not call every man to marriage, but for the many that he does, it is a good thing that they find a godly wife. Outside of salvation in Jesus Christ, a godly wife brings more joy and happiness to a man than anything else on earth. As the Scripture says, “An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels. The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain. She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life” (Proverbs 31:10–12). What man does not want to find that? A woman that he can trust with every ounce of his being. An honest woman of upright integrity that desires her husband’s success. But where does a man begin if he wants to find a woman like that? Where does he start to begin the search for a woman of such value? By no means is this list exhaustive, nor or these necessarily in order of importance, although the first one is.

1) Pursue the Lord with all of your heart This might seem contrary to the objective, but it is actually primary in reaching it. Before a man finds a godly woman, he first finds the living God. He begins to long to glorify Jesus Christ with his life and sees Christ as infinitely valuable and worth all of his time and energy (1 Corinthians 10:31). A godly woman will not settle for anything less! She wants a man that could be a spiritual leader for her, a man that she can respect (1 Peter 3:1). So be a man after God’s own heart and don’t look back!

2) Know your value in Christ Your value is found in the fact that you are created in God’s image and that if you are a believer in Christ, God loves you as much as his beloved Son (John 17:23). If you are seeking your validity or worth in a woman, you will not find a godly woman, because you will be looking for qualities that the world esteems rather than the qualities that God esteems. Rather, you must find your value in God’s love for you displayed at the cross.

3) Pray every day for a godly wife If you are not praying for a godly woman, do not expect God to bring you one. Seek the Lord in prayer and ask him to bring you a godly woman. It is OK to do that. Remember, you are asking the Lord for “a good thing.” Not a bad thing. And as Jesus reminds us, “How much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him” (Matthew 7:11)! Also, pray for wisdom and discernment...

https://cbmw.org/topics/men/10-steps-to-find-a-godly-woman/

 

[razor17]

bad posture (back and neck, born with it did not get it from too much sitting infront of computer etc) - stretch your back and shoulders and practice good posture in front of a mirror....

extremely red lips (looks like lipstick) -

little head. - dress to make your head look not small.... by wearing smaller clothes not loose/baggy

big and deformed nose. - consider rhinoplasty?

bushy eyebrows. - use an eyebrow trimmer

walking strange. - practice walking straight

crooked foot. - get special orthotics (aka shoe pads)

ptosis/lazy eye. - get your eyes tested and high perscription glasses

my skin is terrible. - use skin cleanser or turmeric paste

i have a weird way of looking with my eyes. -get eyes tested

acne. - skin cleanser/turmeric

deformed fingers (they are crooked) - wear gloves when applicable....

Both legs looks strange. - practice walking

extremely skinny arms. - eat meat/protein and work out

long forehead, - wear a cap

birthmarks in the face. -use makeup or get them removed via facial peel

incredible bad at talking with people (i suspect that I have some kind of light damage to the brain) - practice talking online via skype chat/video to others and then with real people

weird voice. - sing/voice training to expand your vocal range

hairy. - shave or trim

unibrow. - eyebrow trimmer

skin that protrudes at the nails. - idk what is meant here....but keep nails short and clean (woman like clean/hygienic men not raggedy ones)...

Hiatus hernia. - get that removed or treated by a doc

strange / ugly hair. - style it with gel/color

big ears. - wear earmuffs or dress to make your ears smaller by wearing a cowboy hat or cap

virgin and unkissed even though I'm so old. - lol you should be proud to be a virgin and also kissing does not cause you to lose your virginity (my aunt kissed me on the cheek......i still have my virginity )


Not had friends irl for 12 years. I do have 2 internet friends thought (2 guys who are like me) - go get some friends whether online or in a church group

Dyslexia. - do speech or reading therapy....

stupid, low iq. - read if not books then at least from reputable sites on the internet like encyclopedia brittanica or others...the more you read the more you learn.

poor eyesight. - glasses/contacts

afraid of dogs and cats. - go to an animal shelter or where there are therapy dogs/cats and interact with them...

will never have a good job and never have a lot of money. - look for a small job as a starting step and then move onto a bigger one....via study or work

sometimes there are a lot of embarrassing random leak and saliva out of my mouth. - use medication to dry up your mouth or eat foods that dry up your mouth ...

ugly looking teeth and they are yellow. - brush with colgate total, baking soda and also see a dentist if applicable...

Sometimes I stammer. - practice talking in front of a mirror to gain confidence....

blinks a lot with the eyes. - stop blinking or get checked for dry eyes ( sometimes dry eyes make you blink a lot to rewet the eyeball)

licking my lips alot. - chapstick

extreme dandruff (no schampoo helps me) = coconut oil or baby oil on the head for a week will improve it....wash off with shampoo (do this before a shower/bath)

sweats a lot and often, i use soap and rollon and try different versions .... but of course its not working. - coconut oil, change your diet so you dont stink...meat heavy diets make a person smell very bad....use more vegetables/fruits to clean up your scent...

Snores loud/weird according to my brothers. I sound like a car (?) - lose weight if applicable....sleep on your side to breathe better airflow into your mouth....

sleeping problems. Whick makes me look tired and sad. - go to bed early...or take 1 tsp of benadryl (if not allergic) or other sleep aid like unisom

no clothes suits me. I look ugly in everything. - get a stylist or ask someone/friend to help you style

long neck. - wear a scarf....or jacket with high collars


Etc. I can just keep going. I tried everything to fix my flaws but nothing is working. How i am supposed to live a normal life with all these flaws. I dont ever see myself getting friends and a wife. People are shallow. Why did god give me so many flaws and made people so shallow.[/QUOTE]


I have put a solution to each problem in the above ...also i seriously hope you are not doign this to troll or else that is really lame to make a woe is me thread just to troll CC users....just saying.....

 

[Demi777]

I keep getting thrown off by the weird language.... what is that