The following is my first, I have a close second which I may post later.
I had a bad upbringing.
My mother gift pregnant with me out of wedlock. This was shameful for a Muslim family.
She was told to abort me. Taken to the clinic and was in the room.
At the last minute she said no. Her dad insisted but the surgeon refused because she said no.
As a result she was the black sheep of the family.
As a result she whilst getting growing up I suffered the brunt of it.
She never told me she loved me, other than when she was drunk, even then being told she loved me could be followed up with a barrage of abuse.
She threw me out when I was 14, she told the family I was gay and had aids amongst other stuff.
We never talked for about 5 years.
I came back to church after not going for 2 years. I went to one of the leaders and asked if we could meet up. He did not know me but agreed. I was really struggling.
When we meet he said "I've been praying this week and I really feel led to ask you about your mother"
I said what about her (we were not taking at that time) I gave a brief history.
He told me to spend some time. Pray to God and ask him to reveal all the stuff you have not forgiven her for, then pray over that and state that you forgive her, when you have done all that then burn the paper and tell God I'm letting it go.
I set aside a Saturday, started about 10 a.m. I finished about 4 p.m
I was shattered. Got something to eat and went to bed about 6.
I prayed "God thank you for today"
Then I heard God say to me "Bill ask me what I think about your mum"
So I did.
I just started crying. I cried for 8 hours solid, I implored God half way through to let me sleep cause I was tired but no.
For those 8 hours God laid on my heart how he weeps for my mum, he cries over her day and night.
As he started to reveal this I once again says please let me sleep.
He said no, there is more I want to reveal, your mother is a hurting woman, you have no idea what she had been through, you have no idea of her hurt and pain. I do. I love your mother so so much and I hurt because she does. You wrote a lot of stuff down today are you really ready to forgive?
That was the breaker for me, I just wrote down words on paper but they were just words but no love.
Then God says to me "Now pray for your mother"
When I did that I was sobbing lots and found myself imploring God "Please, please heal my mum, I have seen just a fraction of your pain for here, please restore us, I really can't take anymore please let me sleep.
I then feel asleep.
We are now restored
It took a few years, a loving wife who showed me how to love, God working in me to love her and truly let go of the past, my mum still walked in the past during this time. But as I walked in it our relationship is restored.
The defining moment when I knew restoration was complete was when one day when we went to see her. As I was leaving she gave me a hug and said "I love you" and I said it back and it was genuine.
The first time I had says it to her and the first time she says it to me whilst not drunk.
Praise Jesus and even now I'm very emotional typing this.
My mum became a Christian 10 years ago at the age of 60.
And God is truly working in her and continuing to release her from her past.
Sorry if some do not see this as precious moments of grace but for me it is.
It started with "Bill ask me about what I feel your mother"
It's his grace that restored our relationship, it's his grace that released me and my mum.
It's his grace that restored the relationship between him and my mum.
Thank you Jesus for saving my mum.