sexual harassment and what to do?
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This. I was 15..almost 6 when she got pregnant. 16 when he was born. He's ten months now. I'm a couple months over 17. I've never attempted to gain popularity by being a screw up 
And I've never tried to portray myself as something I'm not. I don't condone my choices or condemn others...but sometimes the truth has to slap you pretty hard before it all clicks.
And I've never tried to portray myself as something I'm not. I don't condone my choices or condemn others...but sometimes the truth has to slap you pretty hard before it all clicks.
The fact that you are "being a father" to your son is a huge step in the right direction. It will most likely be the most important thing you've ever done... especially in HIS life. He needs a dad, and a mom.... a family... blessings to you for seeing that, and doing that... well done, brother.
And, I didn't know we could gain popularity for screwing up...
if that was the case, I'd be the most popular guy around!
[FONT="]Hello, I’m sorry that you had to experience this from him and that your mom won’t do anything. This is not fair to you that she won’t listen. I know you said for financial reasons you have to stay here for now. I would talk to him and let him know you won’t put up with this. I know you most likely had, but he needs to know that this needs to stop. Therefore, if anyone is going to leave it should be him. I’m wondering if you talked to anyone else about this?. Also, you don’t deserve to feel this way and you should know you don’t have to put up with this you should also file charges. If you need additional support please call; [/FONT][FONT="]The Samaritans it’s a 24-hour confidential hotline at [/FONT][FONT="](212) 673-3000. [/FONT][FONT="]They help through anything. I’m praying for you. [/FONT][FONT="][/FONT]
D
Considering you just generalized when it worked for you, but twisted my words to fit the generalization, don't mind me if I count your counsel worthless here. (And usually I count your counsel as something worthwhile.) Something like going through a sermon on the horrors of Halloween while putting on a costume to go Trick or Treating.
I have never generalized about men on this post. (I have generalized about men often, but usually for humor, and sometimes to differentiate between guy-think vs. gal-think. And one of the things I admire about guy-think is most of the time it is "fix this." Wish it was this time.) I was specific in discussing the men on this particular thread, and yes, half were not emphasizing or understanding. They were bolstering each other. The other half were definitely emphasizing.
Now that it's cleared up how men feel, the problem was judgement abound, but helpful advice did not. This was a "fix it" request that didn't get "fix it" before the damage was done.
What do you think I've been complaining about?
I have never generalized about men on this post. (I have generalized about men often, but usually for humor, and sometimes to differentiate between guy-think vs. gal-think. And one of the things I admire about guy-think is most of the time it is "fix this." Wish it was this time.) I was specific in discussing the men on this particular thread, and yes, half were not emphasizing or understanding. They were bolstering each other. The other half were definitely emphasizing.
Now that it's cleared up how men feel, the problem was judgement abound, but helpful advice did not. This was a "fix it" request that didn't get "fix it" before the damage was done.
What do you think I've been complaining about?
D
This. I was 15..almost 6 when she got pregnant. 16 when he was born. He's ten months now. I'm a couple months over 17. I've never attempted to gain popularity by being a screw up And I've never tried to portray myself as something I'm not. I don't condone my choices or condemn others...but sometimes the truth has to slap you pretty hard before it all clicks.
And I've never tried to portray myself as something I'm not. I don't condone my choices or condemn others...but sometimes the truth has to slap you pretty hard before it all clicks.
It felt more like my dad telling us he was 29 for so long that when my older brother turned 14 and asked Dad how it was he became a dad at 14 years old. (Oldest brother was 15, so Dad would have had to be 13 when Mom became pregnant, if Dad really was 29. And they were married for 15 months before they had their first baby, so it really was ludicrous for us to buy he was 29. lol) Truthfully none of us bought Dad was 29 for years, but that was the moment Dad had to change his story. (Oh, he turned 34 then, so at least we knew he was kidding. And he was, since last time he mentioned how old he was four out of six of his kids were older than he was. lol)
The math simply didn't work right in my mind. And becoming a dad at 15-16 does work mathematically, so that wasn't it.
That's all I remember of your post. And I didn't call you on it, because many people on this site mess up on age or gender when they sign up. BUT ever since then, I've been thinking you did have a child when you were 15, but that was a long time ago, and now your child is a teen or young adult. I've mistakenly aged you into being in your 30s or 40s. (Obviously not true, but that's how I've been thinking of you all this time.)
On the one hand, I'm sorry I didn't believe you are 17 now. I screwed up there, and I'm sorry.
On the other hand, one thing for sure. You know I've never treated you like a kid, because I never thought you were a kid. And, now knowing you're 17 and with a toddler, I'm still not going to treat you like a kid, because, frankly, that in itself says you had to give up being a kid a while ago.
Anything I've shared that was mushy or story would have likely been something about my grandpa....but I likely screwed the wording up Or it could've been something about my younger cousin or brother in law. I end up with them tagging along more than I like....pretty sure it's Gods way of helping my not screw my kid up I've been called on the carpet a few times because people didn't think I was stupid enough to be my actual age. Had you called me on it or anything I'd have fixed what I said and taken no personal offence. I'm not easy to offend...and I'm not really easy to anger anymore.
And I don't expect you or anyone else to treat me like a kid. I don't need kid gloves. I haven't been kid for a very long time and to me one benefit of this forum is that no one has treated me like a kid.Thats how I prefer it.
Or it could've been something about my younger cousin or brother in law. I end up with them tagging along more than I like....pretty sure it's Gods way of helping my not screw my kid up I've been called on the carpet a few times because people didn't think I was stupid enough to be my actual age. Had you called me on it or anything I'd have fixed what I said and taken no personal offence. I'm not easy to offend...and I'm not really easy to anger anymore. And I don't expect you or anyone else to treat me like a kid. I don't need kid gloves. I haven't been kid for a very long time and to me one benefit of this forum is that no one has treated me like a kid.Thats how I prefer it.
D
Well, let's try it on a more personal level.
How have you used your brains to figure out how not to go blind?
I know that sounds mean, but I'm guessing you already are doing all you can do to stop that and have run out of ideas. That is where Tasha was when she asked for help in her situation. And to her, there is no way out. She couldn't come up with a better idea than going back to that house.
And, yes. I really do hope folks on the natural health forum can help you delay that diagnosis. If it's dry macro, sunglasses in bright light helps, even if it's cloudy out. I don't know what helps for wet macro. And I don't know which eye problem you have. I can give you there are programs that translate voice to text and back again, so at least you can still keep coming online. And I know there are playing cards in braille because my grandmother lost her sight late in life. Life isn't over. It really isn't. And I really will pray that the diagnosis is delayed. Lots of stuff we don't get out of as we get older, (arthritis is annoying), but delaying the inevitable is often where I go when I can't fix the problem.
Wouldn't you rather receive advice that may help you, (even if it doesn't), than be blamed for something you may or may not have done wrong that caused the problem?
This is what I've been saying all along.
How have you used your brains to figure out how not to go blind?
I know that sounds mean, but I'm guessing you already are doing all you can do to stop that and have run out of ideas. That is where Tasha was when she asked for help in her situation. And to her, there is no way out. She couldn't come up with a better idea than going back to that house.
And, yes. I really do hope folks on the natural health forum can help you delay that diagnosis. If it's dry macro, sunglasses in bright light helps, even if it's cloudy out. I don't know what helps for wet macro. And I don't know which eye problem you have. I can give you there are programs that translate voice to text and back again, so at least you can still keep coming online. And I know there are playing cards in braille because my grandmother lost her sight late in life. Life isn't over. It really isn't. And I really will pray that the diagnosis is delayed. Lots of stuff we don't get out of as we get older, (arthritis is annoying), but delaying the inevitable is often where I go when I can't fix the problem.
Wouldn't you rather receive advice that may help you, (even if it doesn't), than be blamed for something you may or may not have done wrong that caused the problem?
This is what I've been saying all along.
It's OK, Guys. And Thanks, but she's right. What she doesn't know is that within a few days of receiving that diagnosis, I not only had it verified by other doctors, but, I was well on my way to learning almost as much as some doctors know about Macular Degeneration.
That is what I am talking about. Use your brains. I was diagnosed two years ago, and this forum knew nothing about it..... because it is just about totally ineffective to come running here to ask you guys what to do. As well-meaning as many of you beautiful people are, I knew the fastest and most positively profitable way to do something was to put my brain in gear, and research every possible avenue of likely remedy. (And I soon found a number of things to put into action.)
That is what I am talking about. Use your brains. I was diagnosed two years ago, and this forum knew nothing about it..... because it is just about totally ineffective to come running here to ask you guys what to do. As well-meaning as many of you beautiful people are, I knew the fastest and most positively profitable way to do something was to put my brain in gear, and research every possible avenue of likely remedy. (And I soon found a number of things to put into action.)
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I understood your initial complaint... but then you seemed to go quickly into a downward spiral of anger toward most of the comments made by men. You just seemed too ready to lump all of the men (or, half) in the same category as the (as Willie admitted) abrupt comment about what she should do to improve her situation.
It wasn't the fact that you disagreed and were po'd about the comment, it was that you just kept on and on, including most of the other guys in your return fire.
Sorry if I wasn't clear about that.
It wasn't the fact that you disagreed and were po'd about the comment, it was that you just kept on and on, including most of the other guys in your return fire.
Sorry if I wasn't clear about that.
first of all, let's stop all of the 'you shouldn't have said' posts, valid opinions, but
maybe let's try and share and lead Willie to seek REAL, God-given-ways to heal
what may become wrong with all of us as we AGE in this 'fallen-world...
if you can't find the answers in the Bible, then seek God's people who know what
real healing entails...and not those who take an 'oath' with 'serpents' as a part of
their allegiance...
maybe let's try and share and lead Willie to seek REAL, God-given-ways to heal
what may become wrong with all of us as we AGE in this 'fallen-world...
if you can't find the answers in the Bible, then seek God's people who know what
real healing entails...and not those who take an 'oath' with 'serpents' as a part of
their allegiance...
D
That's what you got out of this? That it was a low blow? So is telling a woman her choices were stupid so use her head.
Right! Low blow!
I tried for pages to tell what to do when giving advice, and he didn't understand, so I took it to something he would understand!
And guess what. I never said he was stupid, or it was his fault, or anything. I gave that same advice he gave her to show him what it feels like when receiving that very stupid advice! Of course it's stupid advice! "Use your head" after running out of ideas and asking for help from strangers already says she tried everything she could think to do. She even told what she had done. She made it a whole year on her own with three kids! That's amazing in itself. It was a low blow!
So, not low blow when Willie does it, but low blow when I do it? And oddly enough, I did it to someone I knew to show what it feels like because he said he had yet to know what I wanted.
Whereas he did it as a Welcome to CC to someone he didn't know.
Next time I'll be sure to enlarge and bold something you write out of context to start a different argument for you. Because, so far that's all you've done on this thread to me.
Right! Low blow!
I tried for pages to tell what to do when giving advice, and he didn't understand, so I took it to something he would understand!
And guess what. I never said he was stupid, or it was his fault, or anything. I gave that same advice he gave her to show him what it feels like when receiving that very stupid advice! Of course it's stupid advice! "Use your head" after running out of ideas and asking for help from strangers already says she tried everything she could think to do. She even told what she had done. She made it a whole year on her own with three kids! That's amazing in itself. It was a low blow!
So, not low blow when Willie does it, but low blow when I do it? And oddly enough, I did it to someone I knew to show what it feels like because he said he had yet to know what I wanted.
Whereas he did it as a Welcome to CC to someone he didn't know.
Next time I'll be sure to enlarge and bold something you write out of context to start a different argument for you. Because, so far that's all you've done on this thread to me.
Nope, I read your whole post, and right there in the context it was in, it seemed like a low blow to me. It still does. And everything else I've bolded from you seemed like what I said they were, right there in the contexts they were in. (I just bold to show what I'm specifically responding to.)
So yeah, I do think you went too far just to make your point and feel "right". Especially since you made that comment after it was pointed out to you that Willie admitted he could have been gentler.
But it's okay. Willie said you were right, and responded graciously. I haven't seen you respond to a single post on this thread graciously (with the exception of your apology to Corbin).
So yeah, I do think you went too far just to make your point and feel "right". Especially since you made that comment after it was pointed out to you that Willie admitted he could have been gentler.
But it's okay. Willie said you were right, and responded graciously. I haven't seen you respond to a single post on this thread graciously (with the exception of your apology to Corbin).
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D
Actually, in a big way, I agree with you. This really isn't the place to come for advice on anything. Especially on this particular forum. (I tend to think Natural Health is equally as useless, but that's another story.) Come here, and you will get all kinds of advice clear across the spectrum. If you're here to get validation, you'll get that as much as you want, whether you should be validated or not. Want a divorce? We can talk you into that no matter what. And along with that you can get arguments.
It really is a bad place to come for advice, however, new folks have no idea about that. But if that's your gripe, how about warning them about that, instead of telling them how stupid they were, especially when what they did that you define as stupid is something they did before becoming believers?
And, yeah, you did the research on what's coming next. I usually do my own research before asking things on this site. I researched for hours ways John could get better use of his hands. Most everything I learned had to do with people maintaining hand strength. You're the guy who taught me the touch-fingers-tip-by-tip 100s of 1000s of times. It's 14 months later. John can now do the "live long and prosper" sign. But he's still touch-fingering. You are capable of giving good advice. I'm asking you to remember your audience. If you don't know them yet, don't be harsh! If you know them, and harsh is required, go for it.
One thing for sure. Most new people who come to this forum are here either because they can't think of any better idea or they just want validation. Coming to you or me for validation is a dumb thing, but coming up with new ideas isn't.
It really is a bad place to come for advice, however, new folks have no idea about that. But if that's your gripe, how about warning them about that, instead of telling them how stupid they were, especially when what they did that you define as stupid is something they did before becoming believers?
And, yeah, you did the research on what's coming next. I usually do my own research before asking things on this site. I researched for hours ways John could get better use of his hands. Most everything I learned had to do with people maintaining hand strength. You're the guy who taught me the touch-fingers-tip-by-tip 100s of 1000s of times. It's 14 months later. John can now do the "live long and prosper" sign. But he's still touch-fingering. You are capable of giving good advice. I'm asking you to remember your audience. If you don't know them yet, don't be harsh! If you know them, and harsh is required, go for it.
One thing for sure. Most new people who come to this forum are here either because they can't think of any better idea or they just want validation. Coming to you or me for validation is a dumb thing, but coming up with new ideas isn't.