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Feb 7, 2015
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How do you feel about men saying things to your wife? Is it cool with you for men to say thing about her appearance? How would you like her to respond to these men? If a man says to your wife "Hey, sugar, you sure are a good lookin' thing" would you like her to respond to him in kind? Laugh coquettishly? Say something complimentary to him?
Men compliment her and tell her she looks fantastic (and she does) all the time. She usually just says "Thank you.", and smiles.
 

Tommy379

Notorious Member
Jan 12, 2016
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Flirting with women at work is how I get things done. I'd have to ride around on 4 flat tires and boots with soles coming off.
 
S

Susanna

Guest
Has this lazy sweet talking flirt where I'm assigned now. He ain't that easy on the eyes, but is so sweet talking that the younger girls are running their butts off for him. Amusing. LOL.
 
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Galatea

Guest
Men compliment her and tell her she looks fantastic (and she does) all the time. She usually just says "Thank you.", and smiles.
There is a difference between being called "hot chocolate" and being told "you look fantastic". One is flirting, the other is not.
If men called your wife "hot" or said something about a certain part of her anatomy, how would you like that?

Being called beautiful or told "you look nice today" or as you say "fantastic" is way different than "hot".

"Hot" is suggestive. Do you make suggestive comments to women, and how does your wife like that?

Supposing someone said to your wife "You're a hot little number." Would that be quite alright if she laughed and said thanks or responded back?
 
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Galatea

Guest
Flirting with women at work is how I get things done. I'd have to ride around on 4 flat tires and boots with soles coming off.
When I was in college, I worked at Pizza Hut for a while. We had cops as regulars. Anyway, one tried to flirt with me, and I simply ignored him. He asked me if I ever talked. I told him "Yes, when there is someone worth talking to."

You see, he had on a wedding band.

Married men flirting disgusts me.

If I worked at your police station, you'd still be driving on flats.
 

notuptome

Senior Member
May 17, 2013
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When I was in college, I worked at Pizza Hut for a while. We had cops as regulars. Anyway, one tried to flirt with me, and I simply ignored him. He asked me if I ever talked. I told him "Yes, when there is someone worth talking to."

You see, he had on a wedding band.

Married men flirting disgusts me.

If I worked at your police station, you'd still be driving on flats.
Allow me to preface my remarks with today I'm celebrating 43 years of marriage to the woman God gave me for my help meet.

Some flirting is quite harmless and some is down right malicious. I understand the complexities of the workplace and proper conduct therein. Obviously that officer needs an invitation to church and to Christ. The invitation needs to include his wife and family. Fidelity extends not only to marriage but to Christ. I trust you were disgusted by his actions but had compassion for his soul and family.

For the cause of Christ
Roger
 

hornetguy

Senior Member
Jan 18, 2016
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I still find it weird that leering and ogling at your female coworkers is now considered perfectly okay conservative Christian behavior but being against it means that you're an overly sensitive liberal snowflake who probably dresses like a slut. I guess as a woman I'm just sensitive to this because a big chunk of the time it doesn't matter how modestly you try to dress, if a guy is a pig then he's going to bother you no matter what. It's disappointing to hear Christians making light of this and blaming
the women.

I have no idea if Bill is guilty of this behavior or not but I find the tone of the thread to be a bit off. As if leering at your coworkers is perfectly natural conservative Christian behavior and only a liberal snowflake would have a problem with it. Modern Christianity is strange.
You are taking this and running right out to the edges of the field with it....

NOBODY in this discussion has said that " leering and ogling at your female coworkers" is acceptable for "conservative Christians" (whatever that means).

Most of us are trying to discuss secular workplace behavior... not how we, as Christians are supposed to behave. Please don't confuse the two standards. We are discussing all aspects of it... how SOME women dress provocatively, then get offended when they get a response. We are also discussing jerks who see ANY type of dress as "provocative" and react in an offensive manner.

If you have never worked in a truly secular environment, then you have no idea of what type of interaction goes on between male and female workers.

I worked construction for almost 10 years before going to work in an industrial manufacturing environment. I had heard all the jokes, and more bad language than most people, I imagine. I thought I had heard it all.... nothing embarrassed me.

I was wrong. I heard more dirty jokes, and sexual comments/stories from WOMEN when I started working in the co-ed environment... some actually made me blush.. and I figured that was impossible before that. I heard a LOT of new words/terms..

A lot of the discourse between men and women was innocent, just fun. Perhaps a little "ribald" humor, but still innocent. Just "folks" working and having fun together. MOST people know if the discourse (flirting?) is innocent, or not. If it makes either party even a little uncomfortable, then it should be stopped. My wife receives more than her share of complimentary comments, and she knows how to take it... and, she knows when it has crossed the line, and is capable of stopping all but the most ignorant/boorish individuals.
 

hornetguy

Senior Member
Jan 18, 2016
7,091
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Allow me to preface my remarks with today I'm celebrating 43 years of marriage to the woman God gave me for my help meet.

Some flirting is quite harmless and some is down right malicious. I understand the complexities of the workplace and proper conduct therein. Obviously that officer needs an invitation to church and to Christ. The invitation needs to include his wife and family. Fidelity extends not only to marriage but to Christ. I trust you were disgusted by his actions but had compassion for his soul and family.

For the cause of Christ
Roger
and... congratulations on the 43 years... you have us beat by about 9 years... :)
 

hornetguy

Senior Member
Jan 18, 2016
7,091
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Supposing someone said to your wife "You're a hot little number." Would that be quite alright if she laughed and said thanks or responded back?
My wife would probably laugh and say "My husband thinks so"
 

Tommy379

Notorious Member
Jan 12, 2016
7,589
1,153
113
When I was in college, I worked at Pizza Hut for a while. We had cops as regulars. Anyway, one tried to flirt with me, and I simply ignored him. He asked me if I ever talked. I told him "Yes, when there is someone worth talking to."

You see, he had on a wedding band.

Married men flirting disgusts me.

If I worked at your police station, you'd still be driving on flats.
Look woman, I just wanted some extra toppings and my drinks refilled a little more often.
 

hornetguy

Senior Member
Jan 18, 2016
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Look woman, I just wanted some extra toppings and my drinks refilled a little more often.
That's funny.... I hope Gala doesn't take you seriously.... we love our Gala, and we know it's just all in fun...
 

notuptome

Senior Member
May 17, 2013
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and... congratulations on the 43 years... you have us beat by about 9 years... :)
And us, by 7 years.
The Lord deserves all the credit. I'm not easy to live with but He gave me a good woman.

Pr 18:22 Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD.

For the cause of Christ
Roger
 
G

Galatea

Guest
Allow me to preface my remarks with today I'm celebrating 43 years of marriage to the woman God gave me for my help meet.

Some flirting is quite harmless and some is down right malicious. I understand the complexities of the workplace and proper conduct therein. Obviously that officer needs an invitation to church and to Christ. The invitation needs to include his wife and family. Fidelity extends not only to marriage but to Christ. I trust you were disgusted by his actions but had compassion for his soul and family.

For the cause of Christ
Roger
At the time, I was 18 or 19. The man was in his forties, married, and flirting with a waitress. It made my skin crawl, and made me feel very sorry for his wife. Another aspect of this flirting business that no one had talked about is this: the utter fakeness of it. I have been in workplaces where women flirt with married men, and then laugh at the men behind their backs for being fatuous. I can remember the girls laughing at him after he left for thinking he was so smooth, when they only flirted back to get a tip.

That aspect of it disgusted me, too.

No, I did not invite him to church. I should have, but at the time, my self preservation mode was to take his order, give him his money, and keep it very impersonal. He probably would have taken an invitation to church in the wrong way, he was that sort. I would rather not print some of the things he said, as they are not really nice. It was not just "put your finger in my drink to make it sweeter". It was a step up from that, but even that is distasteful to me, from a married man.

This was a bit different as he was a customer and not a coworker. I could not complain to anyone as the customer is always right in that sort of field. Anyway, I think he zeroed in on me particularly as I probably exuded "church girl" and it added something to it, I think. Plus the fact that I was uncomfortable. I know the other girls noticed he made more comments to me and said it was because I did not banter with him and it made him mad, kind of like he was entitled since he was a customer.
 
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Galatea

Guest
Wait, you guys DO realize that most of the tome when women flirt with you, they are making fun of you, right? Waitresses, hair dressers, etc. do it to get a tip.

This aspect is disgusting to me, too- how fake it all is.

You know, the ones NOT flirting with you are more honest with you than the ones who DO flirt with you.

It is something to think about.
 

Demi777

Senior Member
Oct 13, 2014
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o_O So telling someone a certain body part is hot aint okay anymore?? whaaaat? So if I tell someone they have hot eyes, it aint okay but if I say they generally look good its alright XD Thats some sense
Calling someone hot chocolate i find kinda funny and cool idea..
Nowadays in rapsongs people love being called black c**** and b***ches and now people freak out about hot chockolate??
Get back to earth please xD
I agree that marries men flirting is annoying, just kick em into the curb and threathen to tell their wife. That helps lol
 

Demi777

Senior Member
Oct 13, 2014
6,889
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I would hit you with a hot frying pan. and then curl your ears with my hair iron

Flirting with women at work is how I get things done. I'd have to ride around on 4 flat tires and boots with soles coming off.
 
G

Galatea

Guest
o_O So telling someone a certain body part is hot aint okay anymore?? whaaaat? So if I tell someone they have hot eyes, it aint okay but if I say they generally look good its alright XD Thats some sense
Calling someone hot chocolate i find kinda funny and cool idea..
Nowadays in rapsongs people love being called black c**** and b***ches and now people freak out about hot chockolate??
Get back to earth please xD
I agree that marries men flirting is annoying, just kick em into the curb and threathen to tell their wife. That helps lol
I realize I am uptight. I like to say I am so square, I am a cube. But, there is a differeence between saying "you are so hot" and "you are so beautiful". I think the former implies something that the latter does not.
I don't listen to rap music, so there's that. One of my kids told me a part of a rap song "your baby's daddy is so broke, he eats cheerios". I said, the baby's daddy should give the baby cheerios, this is how nonsensical rap music is to me.

Do you tell boys they have "hot eyes"? That sounds like a medical condition, like pinkeye or something.

It's all just very fake, to me. I don't know. I think it is kind of gross, for married men to flirt. Especially if they are Christians and meant to be ambassadors. Every really fine, Christian married man I have admired does not or did not flirt with women.

I'll leave you all with this thought: Billy Graham was so concerned that his ministry might be hurt by any kind of appearance of anything improper, that if his wife was not traveling with him, he had a man with him at all times. He wanted to be above reproach, and above temptation. I think it was very wise of him.

Anyway, there are women, Christian and nonChristian who do not appreciate married men flirting with them. I think it is a good thing for everyone to know.

Perhaps it is a cultural thing, I don't know. I do know that ladies are treated as special and I was raised not to allow a man to treat me as less than a lady.
 

Demi777

Senior Member
Oct 13, 2014
6,889
1,958
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Germany
You can bet that when I had a boyfriend I called him hot and told him about his sexy and hot eyes. I wasnt like ''oh nice eyes and oh nice this oh nice this"
I dont have a problem with a not married guy tellin me he thinks Im hot. Just when they start getting primitive and sick.. thats a nogo.
In my opinion your kinda overdoing it. Theres a different between a compliment, flirting and just plain primitive hitting on ppl.

yea like Billy Graham is such a good example by not taking his wife with him :rolleyes:

Married men have one woman they can flirt with and date with all they want. Their wife

I realize I am uptight. I like to say I am so square, I am a cube. But, there is a differeence between saying "you are so hot" and "you are so beautiful". I think the former implies something that the latter does not.
I don't listen to rap music, so there's that. One of my kids told me a part of a rap song "your baby's daddy is so broke, he eats cheerios". I said, the baby's daddy should give the baby cheerios, this is how nonsensical rap music is to me.

Do you tell boys they have "hot eyes"? That sounds like a medical condition, like pinkeye or something.

It's all just very fake, to me. I don't know. I think it is kind of gross, for married men to flirt. Especially if they are Christians and meant to be ambassadors. Every really fine, Christian married man I have admired does not or did not flirt with women.

I'll leave you all with this thought: Billy Graham was so concerned that his ministry might be hurt by any kind of appearance of anything improper, that if his wife was not traveling with him, he had a man with him at all times. He wanted to be above reproach, and above temptation. I think it was very wise of him.

Anyway, there are women, Christian and nonChristian who do not appreciate married men flirting with them. I think it is a good thing for everyone to know.

Perhaps it is a cultural thing, I don't know. I do know that ladies are treated as special and I was raised not to allow a man to treat me a less than a lady.