Looking For a Foreign Wife? May I Humbly Submit Some Realities to Consider...
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You didn't attempt that at all, I've been glancing through the thread periodically.
A little kindness goes a long way and if you can't say anything nice then don't say anything at all
A little kindness goes a long way and if you can't say anything nice then don't say anything at all
Hi Em!
Well apparently, this thread is headed straight down the garbage chute, but I had actually intended to talk about mixed race/culture/country marriages and the challenges they face...
Well apparently, this thread is headed straight down the garbage chute
, but I had actually intended to talk about mixed race/culture/country marriages and the challenges they face...
If we can get this thing back on track, I think I would quite enjoy it!
Have we already covered old geezers marrying absurdly young women? Lotta them in the American-Asian world of matrimony.
Christian values work
I just did a real quick tour around the net
divorce is rising in most nations as laws change...the way they did in the US and Canada
when men are given preference, as in the countries you mention and women do not have the opportunites they do in North America, there are less divorces
that's one well thought out remark you made there......... Western women lost the plot...? while what, men stood helplessly by?
let's just dump on women again because of course it's always all their fault
honestly!
I just did a real quick tour around the net
divorce is rising in most nations as laws change...the way they did in the US and Canada
when men are given preference, as in the countries you mention and women do not have the opportunites they do in North America, there are less divorces
that's one well thought out remark you made there.........
Western women lost the plot...? while what, men stood helplessly by?let's just dump on women again because of course it's always all their fault
honestly!
But what happened when daddy got home may have been different where you are to where she came from. So her expectations may be different. This is assuming that she'd even want to wait for dad to get home. My mom certainly didn't wait for dad to get home. We got it good and proper, probably while he was on his lunch break. Most times by the time he got home we were sorted. Dad got to hear about it when he got home and we just prayed that we didn't get it again.
Well as the offspring of an American-Filipino marriage, and as someone who has had a chance to observe other such unions, I do have a mouthful to say.
However, for the convenience of everyone, I am going to try to limit my ranting to smaller posts.
The majority of the men who married Asians were significantly older than the women. My own parents actually have a comparatively small gap of ten years. I've only ever met one couple who were about the same age. On the other hand, there are plenty who have a 20 year age difference. 30 years difference is also not uncommon. Even 40, which admittedly is pretty gross, but that group has more than their fair share. Though you also must take into account that these really old men usually have a considerable amount of livelihood.
Those are just some random observations.
However, for the convenience of everyone, I am going to try to limit my ranting to smaller posts.
The majority of the men who married Asians were significantly older than the women. My own parents actually have a comparatively small gap of ten years. I've only ever met one couple who were about the same age. On the other hand, there are plenty who have a 20 year age difference. 30 years difference is also not uncommon. Even 40, which admittedly is pretty gross, but that group has more than their fair share. Though you also must take into account that these really old men usually have a considerable amount of livelihood.
Those are just some random observations.
Well as the offspring of an American-Filipino marriage, and as someone who has had a chance to observe other such unions, I do have a mouthful to say.
However, for the convenience of everyone, I am going to try to limit my ranting to smaller posts.
The majority of the men who married Asians were significantly older than the women. My own parents actually have a comparatively small gap of ten years. I've only ever met one couple who were about the same age. On the other hand, there are plenty who have a 20 year age difference. 30 years difference is also not uncommon. Even 40, which admittedly is pretty gross, but that group has more than their fair share. Though you also must take into account that these really old men usually have a considerable amount of livelihood.
Those are just some random observations.
However, for the convenience of everyone, I am going to try to limit my ranting to smaller posts.
The majority of the men who married Asians were significantly older than the women. My own parents actually have a comparatively small gap of ten years. I've only ever met one couple who were about the same age. On the other hand, there are plenty who have a 20 year age difference. 30 years difference is also not uncommon. Even 40, which admittedly is pretty gross, but that group has more than their fair share. Though you also must take into account that these really old men usually have a considerable amount of livelihood.
Those are just some random observations.
Well as the offspring of an American-Filipino marriage, and as someone who has had a chance to observe other such unions, I do have a mouthful to say.
However, for the convenience of everyone, I am going to try to limit my ranting to smaller posts.
The majority of the men who married Asians were significantly older than the women. My own parents actually have a comparatively small gap of ten years. I've only ever met one couple who were about the same age. On the other hand, there are plenty who have a 20 year age difference. 30 years difference is also not uncommon. Even 40, which admittedly is pretty gross, but that group has more than their fair share. Though you also must take into account that these really old men usually have a considerable amount of livelihood.
Those are just some random observations.
However, for the convenience of everyone, I am going to try to limit my ranting to smaller posts.
The majority of the men who married Asians were significantly older than the women. My own parents actually have a comparatively small gap of ten years. I've only ever met one couple who were about the same age. On the other hand, there are plenty who have a 20 year age difference. 30 years difference is also not uncommon. Even 40, which admittedly is pretty gross, but that group has more than their fair share. Though you also must take into account that these really old men usually have a considerable amount of livelihood.
Those are just some random observations.
Well as the offspring of an American-Filipino marriage, and as someone who has had a chance to observe other such unions, I do have a mouthful to say.
However, for the convenience of everyone, I am going to try to limit my ranting to smaller posts.
The majority of the men who married Asians were significantly older than the women. My own parents actually have a comparatively small gap of ten years. I've only ever met one couple who were about the same age. On the other hand, there are plenty who have a 20 year age difference. 30 years difference is also not uncommon. Even 40, which admittedly is pretty gross, but that group has more than their fair share. Though you also must take into account that these really old men usually have a considerable amount of livelihood.
Those are just some random observations.
However, for the convenience of everyone, I am going to try to limit my ranting to smaller posts.
The majority of the men who married Asians were significantly older than the women. My own parents actually have a comparatively small gap of ten years. I've only ever met one couple who were about the same age. On the other hand, there are plenty who have a 20 year age difference. 30 years difference is also not uncommon. Even 40, which admittedly is pretty gross, but that group has more than their fair share. Though you also must take into account that these really old men usually have a considerable amount of livelihood.
Those are just some random observations.
He said that it was very common for him to have his colleague's first set of children with their American wives go through his classes... and then 20 years later, he'd be teaching their second set of children whom they'd had with their new Filipina wives.
Seoul, this was an excellent thread idea, and apart from an invading troll an overall excellent thread. One comment I would add on the age issue is that, it is often hugely culturally driven as well. There have been plenty of times and cultures (and probably still are some) where it was common to try to build business or political alliances by a man marrying his daughters off to his colleagues. In cultures where strong family values hold sway, it's easy to see how making someone literally part of the family helps ensure that you continue to benefit from the success you helped them get. I also saw at least one example of how having strong family values obligates the family members to put aside their own plans to act on behalf of the family (in the case I'm thinking of it was a young man being pressured / ordered to emigrate to a foreign country with government medical care because his sister had just had a special needs baby and they were trying to plan to be able to afford to care for the baby as a family).
And that wasn't what I really came here to say because I just wanted to share the anecdote about one of my Asian friends (when I lived in Asia) saying that she'd have no problem marrying a man 10 years or more older than her, but would rethink having a relationship with a guy who was just a few (more than 2 I think it was) years younger than she was. (Good to know these things because then you can use them as excuses for refusing to date people when the nosy community wants to know why you are single).
And that wasn't what I really came here to say because I just wanted to share the anecdote about one of my Asian friends (when I lived in Asia) saying that she'd have no problem marrying a man 10 years or more older than her, but would rethink having a relationship with a guy who was just a few (more than 2 I think it was) years younger than she was. (Good to know these things because then you can use them as excuses for refusing to date people when the nosy community wants to know why you are single).
Hey Everyone,
One of the recent threads here had me thinking about all the times I've heard men (usually from the USA) talk about how much better it would be to seek a wife from another country, usually because they are frustrated with what they see as a loss of traditional values in the women around them in their own country.
While I can certainly understand their perspective, it often seems to me as if some men see foreign brides, particularly from Asia, as the "last unicorns" of marriage. From the many accounts I've read or heard, it's almost as if many men honestly believe that a submissive wife from another country will fulfill their dreams of wedded bliss, just like a woman waiting to be rescued by her knight in shining armor.
A few years ago, we had a regular poster in Singles who would often sing the praises of men finding wives from the Philippines. I couldn't help but find it amusing that when some of the women here gave some realistic accounts of what a man might run into in his search, he completely ignored anything they had to say and didn't even acknowledge their posts. Apparently, he was looking for a wife who was not only young (he was in his mid-50's), beautiful, and submissive, but also silent and devoid of any thoughts of her own.
Although I grew up in a small, non-diverse Anyville town in the United States, I've had the privilege of knowing a few families in which the man had married a foreign bride. Going back through my memories, I was thinking of about 10 such marriages in which I knew one or more people involved, and in maybe half of those cases, I was close enough to someone that I could ask a few questions about what really went on behind the scenes.
I'd like to share a few pf the things I've observed. To make this easier to read, I'm going to break this up into multiple posts to start off this thread (I'm sorry if that makes it seem a little choppy.)
Now, as I always say, I am, by NO means, an expert. I'm just thinking of what I've seen and heard... AND, this is where you all come in as well--I would love to hear your thoughts, observations, and experiences.
There are probably many people out there who have much more experience with this than me, and I'm hoping they'll share.
And so, to kick this off, I'd like to start by talking about those "traditional family values" that are always cited as a prime reason for seeking a foreign wife (please see next post.)
One of the recent threads here had me thinking about all the times I've heard men (usually from the USA) talk about how much better it would be to seek a wife from another country, usually because they are frustrated with what they see as a loss of traditional values in the women around them in their own country.
While I can certainly understand their perspective, it often seems to me as if some men see foreign brides, particularly from Asia, as the "last unicorns" of marriage. From the many accounts I've read or heard, it's almost as if many men honestly believe that a submissive wife from another country will fulfill their dreams of wedded bliss, just like a woman waiting to be rescued by her knight in shining armor.
A few years ago, we had a regular poster in Singles who would often sing the praises of men finding wives from the Philippines. I couldn't help but find it amusing that when some of the women here gave some realistic accounts of what a man might run into in his search, he completely ignored anything they had to say and didn't even acknowledge their posts. Apparently, he was looking for a wife who was not only young (he was in his mid-50's), beautiful, and submissive, but also silent and devoid of any thoughts of her own.
Although I grew up in a small, non-diverse Anyville town in the United States, I've had the privilege of knowing a few families in which the man had married a foreign bride. Going back through my memories, I was thinking of about 10 such marriages in which I knew one or more people involved, and in maybe half of those cases, I was close enough to someone that I could ask a few questions about what really went on behind the scenes.
I'd like to share a few pf the things I've observed. To make this easier to read, I'm going to break this up into multiple posts to start off this thread (I'm sorry if that makes it seem a little choppy.)
Now, as I always say, I am, by NO means, an expert. I'm just thinking of what I've seen and heard... AND, this is where you all come in as well--I would love to hear your thoughts, observations, and experiences.
There are probably many people out there who have much more experience with this than me, and I'm hoping they'll share.
And so, to kick this off, I'd like to start by talking about those "traditional family values" that are always cited as a prime reason for seeking a foreign wife (please see next post.)
If I was looking for a mate, I would not be looking over seas. If someone from overseas, probably only from the European countries, according to my tastes, bumped into me so to speak, I would not reject my premise. Just that over seas woman are not my idea of nirvana.
Asian and Russian woman, I could not ever see it for me. To each his own though, I say. I would never knock anyone for their tastes.
Personally speaking, if I had to single a geographic area, I would say down south, and as far as a general group, a black woman.
However, if someone is looking for a foreign wife because of submissiveness, and being domesticated, I think your living in bizarro world. That's the type of woman you go for, then I guess who am I to say.
Not for me...not for me...
BTW, I also generally find it weird and almost abnormal when a man who is in his early 50's to mid 50's and older is going with, or married to a woman less then around her late 30's, early 40's. In fact I almost cringe when I see this. To me it's embarrassing.
If I was looking, it's got to be at least early to mid forties.
Some people are just better off single.
If I was looking, it's got to be at least early to mid forties.
Some people are just better off single.