Things have changed. I've changed. ...but I still have that persistent longing inside me to love and be loved... Sometimes I don't think about it. Sometimes it almost consumes me. A great range of thoughts and feelings are associated with it, and I've been from the extremes of completely giving up to sacrificing most other things in my life to find that relationship.
To be honest, as deep of dream in my heart as that has been in the past (and I'd be lying or in denial to say it wasn't still there...)...it baffles me a little. Where did this come from? Why is it so strong? I've starved it and prayed about it several times, but it won't die. Apparently it's not sin...but then, as selfishly incredible as it would be to have someone like that (to love and be loved by)...I've also come to find it's not just anyone. Whoever could be it, honestly, deserves so much better than me and what I can offer.
I mean... it makes perfect sense to me. We are created to need one another, and we crave relationship and communion with each other - most especially with a partner who will love us unconditionally and be beside us in our lives. Many of us are designed to remain contentedly single, but let's face it... MOST of us aren't. When God looked at Adam, even in his perfect state before sin entered the world, he saw that it wasn't good for man to "be alone". I don't think it's wrong to recognize it, admit it, or FEEL it.
As for finding that love... that's the hard part. The practical side of me wants to say "just choose someone to love, and love them". But of course it isn't anywhere close to being that easy. I do believe though, that love is a choice we make, and love grows when we feed it. And once it grows, we can see possibilities where before we may not have. Maybe we should look at someone, decide with practical wisdom and prayer whether they would make a good spouse for us, and then love without reservation. Without holding back. Without continuing to question or waffle or wonder. That would probably open up so many amazing possibilities we didn't know existed. But then, there is fear. Maybe fear is our true enemy in this situation.
I'm blathering, sorry. Mostly to myself.![]()
Putting this up FWIW
[video=youtube;d-_hqFYnhlU]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d-_hqFYnhlU&feature=youtu.be[/video]
Hmm... if you called him a name caller, would that also make you a name caller?name caller!
Hmm... if you called him a name caller, would that also make you a name caller?
No, saying that did not make me a name caller too. I was just asking a question.![]()
Hmm... if you called him a name caller, would that also make you a name caller?
No, saying that did not make me a name caller too. I was just asking a question.![]()
You'll be smelling shock soon.On my way to a swim meet. I know all are shocked...haha
Okay I need to vent so I'm doing it here lol
So me and my brothers were home while my guardians were doing grocery shopping and we were supposed to be doing chores and my brother comes down stairs his hand covered in blood and he was like "Don't freak out but is this bad?"
And he had a cut in his thumb at least a cm. Deep so I was like yeah you need stitches go wash it out blah blah blah.
Well, guess how he freaking cut his hand.
He was trying to open a knife in his room (WHICH WHY IN THE WORLD HE HAS A KNIFE IN HIS ROOM I HAVE NO IDEA -_-)
And he cut himself.
I dont understand why people can't just do chores without doing something stupid!!!!
Ughh
I hope your brother is okay.