Would you hit (or spank) your children?
- Thread starter JesusmyLord
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N
good point.
I think every child is different, The technique i like the best is that you try to be their friend & a parent at the same time, talk to them & all. If they are like 2 & younger then you can try time outs & all but once they get 4 years old & dont listen or start acting up for a long time a little spanken in the butt would hurt them a minute or two but it will teach them to behave or they will get the spanken again... But once they start getting older it can also make them want to fight back... so theres pros & cons towards hitting them in the butt.
I guess every child is different some need spankens others need time outs others need to go sit in a room alone without electronics let them be bored in that room for 30 min or so others need to be grounded & so on.
When it comes to teenagers, the best way is to make sure you taught them about God when growing up that way they know about God & then once they get into their teenager years you can be more of their friends so instead of them going to their friends with their problems they go to you.
For example talk to them about boyfriends so they can be close to you.
I talk to my mom about my boyfriends, & my mom has told me its bad to have sex before marriage. If you can talk to your teenage child about sex & boyfriend/girlfriends then theres simply no need of spanking, but only of words, when they come to you with things like "mom someone offered me some drugs at school" dont snap on them & say you are grounded unless you tell me who that is im, going to the police or to the school principal.
That will imediatly make them regret telling you & might not open up to you any time soon or for years.
Instead talk to them like remember what i told you about drugs, & did you try any? Let them know that can lead to addiction & so on.
& ask them if they would like for you to report them privately to the principal or police man.
just a example.
I think every child is different, The technique i like the best is that you try to be their friend & a parent at the same time, talk to them & all. If they are like 2 & younger then you can try time outs & all but once they get 4 years old & dont listen or start acting up for a long time a little spanken in the butt would hurt them a minute or two but it will teach them to behave or they will get the spanken again... But once they start getting older it can also make them want to fight back... so theres pros & cons towards hitting them in the butt.
I guess every child is different some need spankens others need time outs others need to go sit in a room alone without electronics let them be bored in that room for 30 min or so others need to be grounded & so on.
When it comes to teenagers, the best way is to make sure you taught them about God when growing up that way they know about God & then once they get into their teenager years you can be more of their friends so instead of them going to their friends with their problems they go to you.
For example talk to them about boyfriends so they can be close to you.
I talk to my mom about my boyfriends, & my mom has told me its bad to have sex before marriage. If you can talk to your teenage child about sex & boyfriend/girlfriends then theres simply no need of spanking, but only of words, when they come to you with things like "mom someone offered me some drugs at school" dont snap on them & say you are grounded unless you tell me who that is im, going to the police or to the school principal.
That will imediatly make them regret telling you & might not open up to you any time soon or for years.
Instead talk to them like remember what i told you about drugs, & did you try any? Let them know that can lead to addiction & so on.
& ask them if they would like for you to report them privately to the principal or police man.
just a example.
D
YES SMACK THEM ITS GOOD FOR THEM! its a bit of a mystery why some kids are really well behaved others are naught! in my family all of us kids went of the rails! but my girlfriends family all the kids were good! Ive noticed the main distinction is they use fear to control them eg. dont go up there a spider will get you! Is that smart or wrong because its manipulation!
here's the article I read, it's Australian, but we enjoy a smack now and then:
http://www.news.com.au/adelaidenow/story/0,22606,26550345-5006301,00.html
http://www.news.com.au/adelaidenow/story/0,22606,26550345-5006301,00.html
F
interesting. I believe it has to do with the individual. I have seen some of my friends who's parents who swore that spanking them helped and now all I see them is as brats. I was never spanked and I can honestly say I am not a brat. I think its more of how your parents live than how they discipline.
M
I'd say that is true, both me and my brothers were spanked when we were young and we turned out better than others in our wider family who either had no physical discipline or had too much and were physically abused by their parents, i.e. hit with snooker cues.
I think it is important for parents to walk the line, fear does keep children/teenagers line, the important thing that must be remebered is that the child should fear the punishment NOT the parents, I always feared being smacked by my parents because it hurt but I never feared my parents in fact I respect them now as an adult for having the courage to discipline me even when they found it unpleasent to do so.
While I am not certain there are any absolutes I would say that if a child fears their parents they weren't disciplined, they were more likely abused, and too many parents either go too far or don't go far enough out of fear of going too far, and so we end up with children running the household and others hiding away and doing things in secret to avoid their parents all together.
I think it is important for parents to walk the line, fear does keep children/teenagers line, the important thing that must be remebered is that the child should fear the punishment NOT the parents, I always feared being smacked by my parents because it hurt but I never feared my parents in fact I respect them now as an adult for having the courage to discipline me even when they found it unpleasent to do so.
While I am not certain there are any absolutes I would say that if a child fears their parents they weren't disciplined, they were more likely abused, and too many parents either go too far or don't go far enough out of fear of going too far, and so we end up with children running the household and others hiding away and doing things in secret to avoid their parents all together.