Thank you so very much for the kind words, and I am sorry you are having a hard time now, but I didn't do anything. That was where I had to go before He could save me. I hit a wall where I was in a place I couldn't stand on my own anymore, and knew without a shadow of a doubt there was nothing I could do about it. I didn't think I had any other options, and remember I already thought I was Christian so I never even thought about going to Jesus. This is what's so scary to me about how churches do the "ask Jesus into your heart" prayer, you're saved no matter what happens ever. Sorry but I said that prayer and was dunked under water for good measure yet still wasn't saved, and honestly couldn't have been more wrong about what I thought Christianity even was. I am scared and thankful for the thought now, but if I would have died in that wreak I would have been one of those that said Lord, Lord, and would have been told “I never knew you”. My pride was way too big for God to come in, and plus I didn’t want to let go of the world yet, but at my lowest right before He regenerated me, I was done period. 33 years of my life, all my pride, everything I’d experienced, everything I had built, all of it, everything I though was so great, any accomplishment I ever achieved, all of that led me to the crying and broken heap in the middle of my floor, all alone knowing I had no power to change a thing. That was all I did with my whole life to that point, from then to now all credit goes to God (really since I was conceived, but the change in me and how I live now). The only reason I’m not still mentally broken beyond repair crying on that floor is because of His strength NOT MINE. I thank you for taking the time to read it and will pray for your situation and wish you and your family their best.[/QUObyE] Hey Jim bone I can relate my best friend at one time was told by his lawyer that he was actually on the dea's top ten list. And one day the Lord put à verse in my heart and it was what does it profit a man if he gains the world and lose his soul.Looking back I think He didn't chose that verse randomly. Its funny I used to think I was so cool, but the reality was I was under God's wrath. Sometimes we try to picture what paradise is, but when we understand what Christ did for us on the cross we begin to start seeing paradise. I have learned it takes a truly repentant heart to see what all was done for us by Christ dying on the cross. That include having no bitterness towards democrats or republicans, no bitterness towards Isis, and learning to not resist evil no matter who hits you because vengeance belongs to the Lord He will repay.