Soulmates?

[RachelP03]

I'm sure this question has been asked a million and one times, but do you believe that God has someone out there for you specifically if you just trust and have faith in Him?

I believe God is the All Knowing and so He knows which paths we are going to take. I'm not sure if I believe that there are "options " out there for us..... I believe alot of people marry the wrong person but God already knew that...... I feel as if we just put our full trust in God then we old save alot of heartache and we can just simply hand him over the pen to our Love story and let him write it.

 

[Ugly]

I'm sure i'll be mocked again for speaking up on this subject, but there is nothing biblical to indicate this.
To learn the real history behind the term 'soul mate' check this link out... Soul Mates and Selfishness
People try to use Adam and Eve as evidence, but it's not. They were the first two of creation. They needed to be created for each other.
Honestly the idea that two people are created for each other generally defies the real purpose of creation as a whole. Which is not for one another, but for God.
Paul was so adamant about not getting married even to the point of saying not to marry unless you can't control your urges, and if the person who wrote most of the NT taught that, he surely didn't believe humans were created for one another for marriage.
To me the idea is secular romanticism with no biblical back, either direct scripture, or even pulling scriptures together. We all want to have this grand idea that our love story is predestined and so special that another human is created for us. Which, to me, is a selfish notion. People talking about 'soul mates' or whatever term you want always emphasize the Other person being created for them, but they never want to think of themselves as the one being created for the other. Everything about this notion screams 'unbiblical' from the origins, to the intents behind it and that God is creating people for other people, rather than Himself.

 

[Nautilus]

The idea of soulmates is ridiculous. So out of 7 billion people there is one that im supposed to find to marry? Or should I just hang around for God to get all the legal work handled because if its 1 of 3.5 bilion(assuming a 50/50 sex divide in the human population) the still there is a great percentage chance she won't even be from this country. I sure hope we know each others language. Not to mention Im too assume that somehow this person has been picked to be in some way/hopefully most ways attractyive to me. Which if its a soulmate doesnt make sense because what I like has changed many times over the course of my life.

The whole soulmate thing is a crutch for people that cant find love. By saying God just hasn't provided them said soulmate, they can shift the blame to God's timing rather than accepting that they are probably just a miserable person for others to try to date.

 

[llc84]

The idea of soulmates is ridiculous. So out of 7 billion people there is one that im supposed to find to marry? Or should I just hang around for God to get all the legal work handled because if its 1 of 3.5 bilion(assuming a 50/50 sex divide in the human population) the still there is a great percentage chance she won't even be from this country. I sure hope we know each others language. Not to mention Im too assume that somehow this person has been picked to be in some way/hopefully most ways attractyive to me. Which if its a soulmate doesnt make sense because what I like has changed many times over the course of my life.

The whole soulmate thing is a crutch for people that cant find love. By saying God just hasn't provided them said soulmate, they can shift the blame to God's timing rather than accepting that they are probably just a miserable person for others to try to date.

I get what you're trying to say, but whoa... "rather than accepting that they are probably just a miserable person for others to try to date?"

So someone who has never dated is miserable? Not good enough? Deeply flawed? Damaged goods?

As someone who deals with severe depression and low self-esteem, that is very triggering and hurtful.

 

[cinder]

It should also be mentioned that the idea of "being made for each other" tends to make people less willing to work at marriage. Often the idea is that if we are made for each other there will be little or no conflict, so when conflict happens people start to wonder if they married the wrong person instead of wondering how to make the marriage work.

 

[Shouryu]

If the concept of soulmates were legit, then Christ wouldn't have had an answer for the Saducees when they questioned Him on the bride and seven brothers. There's a reason that we will no longer be married when we're taken from this world.

I'll throw this one out there one more time to prove my point.

Got a friend. Will call her Beth. Beth's mother died from cancer when she was a sophomore in high school. Her father adored her mother, and he and his three children loved that woman to her dying breath.

A year or so later, Beth's father remarried to a woman in their church. He loves his second wife very much. Beth gained a stepmother and a stepsister, and now, they have been family for over a decade. Beth loves all of them no different than her own sister and brother.

So...which one is her father's soulmate? First wife, or second wife?

See the problem when you insist on the soulmate concept?

 

[Nautilus]

I get what you're trying to say, but whoa... "rather than accepting that they are probably just a miserable person for others to try to date?"

So someone who has never dated is miserable? Not good enough? Deeply flawed? Damaged goods?

As someone who deals with severe depression and low self-esteem, that is very triggering and hurtful.

Meh, it wasnt directed to anyone in particular, but I say whats on my mind sorry not sorry. And this next part might sting a few more people, but once youve gotten to a certain point with never having been on a date or kissed(unless its by personal conviction/choice) then perhaps it is something with you and not the world around you. Like the psycho kid who shot up santa-whatever, califronia and blamed it on girls not giving him the time of day...well maybe they just realized he was a narcissistic nutbag. He never wanted to admit it was him or work on himself so he never did get that date.

 

[RachelP03]

What about the married couples who prayed for their spouse and God put on their heart that, that person is the one they should marry?

 

[llc84]

Meh, it wasnt directed to anyone in particular, but I say whats on my mind sorry not sorry. And this next part might sting a few more people, but once youve gotten to a certain point with never having been on a date or kissed(unless its by personal conviction/choice) then perhaps it is something with you and not the world around you. Like the psycho kid who shot up santa-whatever, califronia and blamed it on girls not giving him the time of day...well maybe they just realized he was a narcissistic nutbag. He never wanted to admit it was him or work on himself so he never did get that date.

I've never been kissed. Never been on a date. I'm far from the "kid who shot up Santa Barbara."

No one is perfect. But to even suggest that?

Wow.

I'm seriously, seriously hurt to the point of tears that anyone would even think that.

 

[Nautilus]

What about the married couples who prayed for their spouse and God put on their heart that, that person is the one they should marry?

People also claim God told them to kill their children. not sure people personally attributing thoughts and feelings to God is a legitimate measure of truth.

 

[JustAnotherUser]

Meh, it wasnt directed to anyone in particular, but I say whats on my mind sorry not sorry. And this next part might sting a few more people, but once youve gotten to a certain point with never having been on a date or kissed(unless its by personal conviction/choice) then perhaps it is something with you and not the world around you. Like the psycho kid who shot up santa-whatever, califronia and blamed it on girls not giving him the time of day...well maybe they just realized he was a narcissistic nutbag. He never wanted to admit it was him or work on himself so he never did get that date.

So if you're aware that you may have things that prevent you from dating, what's stopping you from changing it? You obviously know that there may be more options before giving up. To say that pretty much anyone who never had dates or hasn't been in a serious relationship to this present day are pretty much rejects is kind of narrow minded in itself, and it will probably hurt more people since from looking at these forums, there's people who are upset about being single... It could be just my impression, but... Take it how you will. I can see why you may be frustrated but there's a time and place for everything and you could bring someone down in the process (which it looks like you did for someone).

 

[Nautilus]

I cant worry about the untold number of people who may dislike something I write. If people were worried about offending others with everything we said or wrote there would be very little in the form of communication.

I don't have things that prevent me from dating. Im good.

But whenever you see those threads about people not getting dates it makes you wonder...if Honey Boo-Boo's mom can get married and have kids, why cant you find someone to at least take you out for coffee?

 

[Shouryu]

Grace-Like-Rain and I are eating the exact same candy, at the exact same time, 800 miles apart.

We are soulmates.

(We really are eating the same candy at the same time. Coincidentally.)

 

[llc84]

I cant worry about the untold number of people who may dislike something I write. If people were worried about offending others with everything we said or wrote there would be very little in the form of communication.

I don't have things that prevent me from dating. Im good.

But whenever you see those threads about people not getting dates it makes you wonder...if Honey Boo-Boo's mom can get married and have kids, why cant you find someone to at least take you out for coffee?

I guess I'm paranoid, but I seriously feel like you keep directing these messages to me.

Oh well.

 

[JustAnotherUser]

All I'm saying is that there's better ways to bring something into light than to conclude about situations that many others also struggle with. I almost did the same thing once and good thing I never posted it, because it would've ended differently than the person who brought the topic up being uplifted at the end of it.

 

[Nautilus]

I guess I'm paranoid, but I seriously feel like you keep directing these messages to me.

Oh well.

I don't think I've ever chatted with you let alone met you until this thread. Why would things I post be directed at you?

 

[cinder]

OK. It's time for cinder's class on how to get along with people who process the world very differently from you.

LLC84- Nautilus' first comment was a general comment. He in no way had you in mind and though he could have been nicer about the way he expressed it, it was not directed towards you. His point was that some people use the idea of a "right one" to avoid looking at what they may need to change and improve in themselves. Rather than recognizing their weak and difficult points and working to become a better person and ultimately a better person for someone to marry. I doubt he does personal so all of his examples were illustrations of his main point. He is not and it never crossed his mind to compare you to them personally.

Nautilus - The appropriate response when someone actually gets up the courage to tell you that what you said was hurtful is never meh. As you claim to be a Christian, you are commanded to show brotherly love and compassion. It's one thing to express your opinion bluntly, it's another thing to respond to someone saying I can't be bothered to care how I'm going to affect you. For future reference the appropriate response when someone says " you just hurt me" is " I did not intend to hurt you, my comments were not directed at you personally but just a general pattern I have observed" as that part of the statement is personal whatever you say next will probably be taken personally so stop it there and put new ideas in a new post.

Have we got that straightened out now?

 

[llc84]

I don't think I've ever chatted with you let alone met you until this thread. Why would things I post be directed at you?

Which is why I said I was being paranoid. But everything you said (never been on a date, never been kissed, threads about not getting dates) all applies to me. It hurts, but you've already stated you didn't care who it offends. So... it doesn't matter.

 

[jer2911]

I'm sure this question has been asked a million and one times, but do you believe that God has someone out there for you specifically if you just trust and have faith in Him?

I believe God is the All Knowing and so He knows which paths we are going to take. I'm not sure if I believe that there are "options " out there for us..... I believe alot of people marry the wrong person but God already knew that...... I feel as if we just put our full trust in God then we old save alot of heartache and we can just simply hand him over the pen to our Love story and let him write it.

Be sure to have a soul first... LOL and be sure your soul is saved! And who knows?

You are free to post any topic. My view is below:

If not God choose a spouse for you then now the thread is if God ordained a soulmate. Many threads about the future boyfriend/girlfriend, partners in life. Or men/women being frustrated not being married and not knowing the right guy/girl. Or how do you know he is the one. Or why do you think you're still single/unmarried/divorced... etc. etc. etc.

Just curious, is it really worth knowing? As for me, i rather start caring than knowing. YOLO! You only live once.


I wonder... If Jesus will go down from heaven today, does the answer matter? There are only two great commandments LOVE GOD with all of your heart... and LOVE your neighbor as yourself/as I HAVE LOVED YOU. If you gonna love a man/woman as Jesus loved him/her, would it matter whether he/she is your soulmate... would it matter if you failed to choose not the right soulmate? JUST DO IT! LOVED THEM AS JESUS DID. No questions asked.

Again, we are all free to post any topic and if it is redundancy, pls. don't take my view here against something or someone, Seems like the time alloted for loving is wasted over knowing.

Have a blessed day!

 

[Fenner]

I'm with Ugly on this. I've always thought the term soul mate sounded like a silly romance novel term. I am sure GOD can lead you in the right direction as far as a mate, but I don't think he plays matchmaker. In the Bible it says to not be unequally yolked, to respect each other, or another term, but anyhow be kind to each other. So those are traits you should look for in a spouse.

Also till death do us part. I believe I will reunite with loved ones in Heaven, including my Husband, but it will be different there. So Iview the term soul mate as being one couple forever and that wouldn't make sense.