Online Dating Sites: Myth vs Fact

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Crimson_Lark

Crimson_Lark

Senior Member
#1
Apr 17, 2012
207
15
18
#1
There seems to be so much misinformation about online dating sites. I've been on a couple online dating sites(eharmony, okcupid etc) and here are some things I think you should know about them.

Myth #1 - Dating sites are used as a way to date.
No. Most people use dating sites ONLY to be introduced. Then they meet in person and if it goes well- date in person.

Myth #2- Everyone on a dating site is a liar/creep.
Although there are people who lie and deceive(much like face to face life) there are also some really decent human beings who use dating sites. I know, I've met some great men who I was introduced to online.

Myth #3- Dating sites are for desperate people.
Actually dating sites are used by lots of people. Often it's because they are busy(career oriented, military etc.), live in a small town or just want to try it to see what it's like.

Myth#4- God is against dating sites because you aren't trusting God.
Regardless of someone's personal convictions, there is nothing in the bible that says dating sites are morally wrong.
Nothing. I trust God to provide food and water for me AND I work and go to the grocery store.
We are actively engaged in this world. So why should that change when it comes to meeting someone?

I'll go further and say that dating sites can be a better investment of your time and energy than going to parties etc. Online you can easily see what someone may think about certain issues(deal breakers) in their responses. The same information can take months to glean in person.


Of course not all dating sites are equal. It's important to look at the target demographic, what information is shared and how many members they actually have. Ok so that's it, feel free to add your thoughts or disagree at will......
 
O

OceanGrl

Guest
#2
#2
I don't think there is anything wrong with dating sites, but you'd want to stick with a Christian oriented one or make sure you talk about your beliefs upfront.
 
B

BLINDSIDE_CHIK

Guest
#3
#3
I've met someone from online and dated in person. But I wish I hadn't because they were everything in the myths and I think I was as desperate as they were. I didn't trust God, I trusted my self and it turned out to be the most horrible thing that ever happened to me. I would now rather meet someone face to face rather than online if they are prospective dating material. However, I have other family who has been dating someone they met online and its been going I good for them I guess, they are still together. I don't think its for everyone. If you meet someone online make sure you are not alone, and that over time you get to know that person just as long as you would take to get to know someone else had you not met them online. Think smart, always.
 
D

Donkeyfish07

Guest
#4
#4
Well for you ladies, meeting up with someone you met online is not always SAFE. I think it's a good idea not to do it at all but...... If your set on doing it, at the very least make sure the first meet up is done in a public place with several of your friends with you. Any reasonable person will be ok with that. There's a lot of crazies around and they aren't always easy to sniff out.
 
follower2

follower2

Banned
#6
May 5, 2013
161
0
0
#6
Sadly, christian mingle.com isnt free :(
 
S

SparkleEyes

Senior Member
#7
Mar 23, 2013
771
21
18
#7
follower2 said:
Sadly, christian mingle.com isnt free :(
Click to expand...
What is wrong with Christian Mingle charging for their services? They operate as a business and businesses need to make money. (I am not sure if they are owned or operated by Christians. Regardless, it doesn't change the premise of charging a fee.) Would you say a Christian electrician who markets her electrical services to Christian homeowners should not charge for providing electrical services? :cool:
 
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Shouryu

Guest
#8
#8
follower2 said:
Sadly, christian mingle.com isnt free :(
Click to expand...
None of the sites with a decent matching algorithm are. On the other hand, as good as CM and Match.com's algorithms might be, it's all pointless if the single population in the area you live is...less than ideal. >_<
 
A

ann247

Guest
#9
#9
I've tried some sites such as plenty of fish.and zoosk. Not so many Christian men out there on those dating sites. Most just want a hook up. It is frustrating sometimes. I'm on Christian mingle but haven't subscribed yet. I also live in a small town so the variety is scarce. Its tough being a young single Christian mom.
 
S

Shouryu

Guest
#10
#10
Yeah, PoF really is the worst. It probably has the most subscribers, being free at all, but it really does seem to be the stomping ground for hookups.

Probably the most frustrating thing for me out of all these sites, save for CM, is that I can set my search parameters to only show women who identify as Christian. And sure enough, plenty of women in my city identify as such. But when you read their profile or their other information, you don't really see any indication of actually LIVING a Christian lifestyle. Other than checking a box, they don't write that God or their faith is important in their life, or every - single - photo of them is in a night club with a drink in their hand. (I'm not anti-alcohol, but is the non-stop party boy/girl the type of lifestyle Christ expects of us?) Too many of the people on the non-CM sites are just CINOs. Maybe they identify as Christian because their parents made them go to church as a kid. Maybe they're Sunday-only Christians. Maybe they truly believe there is a God, but that's all. I dunno.

It's all terribly frustrating. I've pretty much given up on it all. I've stayed subscribed to CM just because at the very least, there seem to be very very few CINOs. I haven't found many local prospects that I felt I had a lot in common with, but I figure if I'm gonna find a Christian who is passionate about her faith on a dating site, it's probably going to happen on CM well before it will on Match, OKC, PoF, Zoosk, or HBW.

(Why no eHarmony? REJECTED. That's not disheartening at all. "Your ex doesn't like you anymore? Awww. Neither do we." *laughs*)
 
R

Relena7

Guest
#12
#12
Donkeyfish07 said:
Well for you ladies, meeting up with someone you met online is not always SAFE. I think it's a good idea not to do it at all but...... If your set on doing it, at the very least make sure the first meet up is done in a public place with several of your friends with you. Any reasonable person will be ok with that. There's a lot of crazies around and they aren't always easy to sniff out.
Click to expand...
Men should also be careful. I'm sure there are crazy female axe murderers out there too. :p
 
R

Relena7

Guest
#13
#13
An easy assumption for an online dating newbie: If someone is a 98% match with you on OKcupid, it must mean they agree with you on 98% of all crucial things, therefore you should date.

Speaking from past experience, this is a big fat myth. :rolleyes:
 
S

Shouryu

Guest
#14
#14
Relena7 said:
An easy assumption for an online dating newbie: If someone is a 98% match with you on OKcupid, it must mean they agree with you on 98% of all crucial things, therefore you should date.

Speaking from past experience, this is a big fat myth. :rolleyes:
Click to expand...
Believe nothing until you actually read their questions and answers.

One hundred percent match!!!

Oh, she only answered two questions, and I answered 200. And we match on the two she answered. *facepalm*
 
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Relena7

Guest
#15
#15
Shouryu said:
Believe nothing until you actually read their questions and answers.

One hundred percent match!!!

Oh, she only answered two questions, and I answered 200. And we match on the two she answered. *facepalm*
Click to expand...
Back then I had answered around 500something questions, and he had generated a good number too. I have no idea how we wound up having so much in common when we disagreed on so much.

My main guess is the computer lumped us together because we both put "Christian" as a religion and must have answered most of the very basic "Christiany" questions the same, lol.
 
taggerung

taggerung

Senior Member
#16
Apr 26, 2009
219
2
18
34
#16
I actually met somebody very nice on Christian mingle. We chatted for a bit, then met up. Long story short, we are just friends now, and continue to hang out :)
 
secularhermit

secularhermit

Banned
#17
May 3, 2013
8,719
75
0
#17
I rather like being me, Frienship comes 1st and Dating comes and goes...

My blog 13 mentioned part of that predicament.
 
maxwel

maxwel

Senior Member
#18
Apr 18, 2013
9,526
2,607
113
#18
Hmmm.

I find that girls are much more prone to appreciate my vast ineptitude if they meet me in person.

: )
 
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