You are an egnima, to be sure. You say you can't trust someone unless you get to know them, and that you are scared of the Lord, if God could be proven we would not need faith and the word says without faith it is impossible to please him. That you have been a Christian for 8 years and were raised in a Christian family, and that you are afraid of everything and cannot find comfort in your religion. God is God, he is not a religion, and he wants a relationship with you. But it cannot be unless you are willing, it would be one sided and love must be reciprocated, given and received. We can pray that you will be delivered from the spirit of fear, and that you will be able to over come it, and draw closer to the lord.
Father God, I pray for this your child, that you will set her free from the tormenting spirit of fear that is plaguing her, I bind it and rebuke it and command it to leave her, loose her and let her go free, and I ask that you will loose the angels to minister to her as an heir of salvation, draw her close to you, amen.
I highly suggest that you do a word study on the words fear and faith, they are exact opposites. You must fill your spirit with faith filled words.