WOMENS' SURVEY - Why You Ended the Relationship? After a few dates or many months.
- Thread starter Sculpt
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Well spoken. You were wise to break things off with the selfish person. Humility is a key attribute for any relationship to grow and prosper. Lost my mom to cancer in 2019 and my dad to cancer in 2008. You are right. God loves you just the way that you are. No, you need not prove yourself to anyone.
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Looking to hear from some more of our insightful women!
(only two so far)
Why did you stop dating the guy you were seeing?
(Let's say after you went out with him at least 3 times)
Why did you end the relationship?
(Let's say you went out a few weeks to over a year)
...Looking in particular for reasons other than cheating, violence and drug use...
(only two so far)
Why did you stop dating the guy you were seeing?
(Let's say after you went out with him at least 3 times)
Why did you end the relationship?
(Let's say you went out a few weeks to over a year)
...Looking in particular for reasons other than cheating, violence and drug use...
I believe that Rehab is the name of a woman mentioned in the bible that helped a couple of spies from the wilderness from Moses camp. No, that was actually Rahab. My bad. 
Good grief, a hooker in Christ's family tree... there's something you don't hear preached about very often.
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You know, sometimes it is just simple. The Lord shows you that the person isn’t right for you. It can seem sudden, but should be appreciated and respected. You don’t want to be with someone if it’s not right. Sometimes there isn’t a specific reason, but a feeling.
I’m sorry it seems that you haven’t gotten answers, but you should pray and ask the Lord to show you what’s happening. Ask him to reveal what if anything you may need to work on.
I personally believe that 6 months is a short amount of time for 1 relationship, but to have had two close relationships, either girl could have felt it just wasn’t meant to be and certainly would be justified. It’s a get to know you period in that amount of time really. It should be expected earlier on.
I’m sorry it seems that you haven’t gotten answers, but you should pray and ask the Lord to show you what’s happening. Ask him to reveal what if anything you may need to work on.
I personally believe that 6 months is a short amount of time for 1 relationship, but to have had two close relationships, either girl could have felt it just wasn’t meant to be and certainly would be justified. It’s a get to know you period in that amount of time really. It should be expected earlier on.
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perhaps they have been the most common reasons
So Ruby, just with the last two fellows you decided to stop seeing (that you went out with 3 or more times), what were the main reasons you decided not to proceed? This is all anonymous.
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Thanks for the loving advice, LoveComesSoftly (love you name, by the way), I appreciate it. Responding to your 1st paragraph: I do appreciate and respect anyone's decision to stop seeing someone. In my case, I don't know that God showed them anything. They certainly didn't mention God showing them anything. I don't doubt sometimes it's a feeling, sometimes a more practical issue, or a combination; but there's usually a main one.
Responding to your 2nd paragraph: I did ask the Lord to show me what happened and if there was anything to work on. Responding to your 3rd paragraph: I never doubted (and never said) their reasons were justified, I hope I didn't give that impression. I just said I didn't know what they were. Maybe reasons were because I was white, or too thin, or too tall, and those would be justified in the sense whatever their reasons are they are automatically justified. Nobody needs to get defensive about it. It's just information. But you have to admit, "Wasn't meant to be" is a euphemism, that is, it represents the real reasons that are not being revealed.
So LoveComesSoftly, just with the last two fellows you decided to stop seeing (that you went out with 3 or more times), what were the main reasons you decided not to proceed? This is all anonymous.
Responding to your 2nd paragraph: I did ask the Lord to show me what happened and if there was anything to work on. Responding to your 3rd paragraph: I never doubted (and never said) their reasons were justified, I hope I didn't give that impression. I just said I didn't know what they were. Maybe reasons were because I was white, or too thin, or too tall, and those would be justified in the sense whatever their reasons are they are automatically justified. Nobody needs to get defensive about it. It's just information. But you have to admit, "Wasn't meant to be" is a euphemism, that is, it represents the real reasons that are not being revealed.
So LoveComesSoftly, just with the last two fellows you decided to stop seeing (that you went out with 3 or more times), what were the main reasons you decided not to proceed? This is all anonymous.
R
I am sorry Sculpt but the reasons were the ones already mentioned that you do not wish to hear.
My suggestion to you is if you are seeking to meet someone rather than wanting to know what not to do, surrender to the Lord and ask him to change you by his spirit into the man he wants you to be. He knows everything about you and where you may miss the mark and what your weaknesses may be. When you allow him to change you (this is a process and takes time) then he will bring the right woman across your path.
Note you do not have to be perfect but someone who is totally surrendered to him and not wanting to be in control is someone he can work on and change. In this process you can meet someone. Problem is most of us haven't totally surrendered and am wanting to be in control ourselves, trying to change on our imperfections in the flesh which will not last especially when trials or difficulties hit. I am in the process of doing this myself.
My suggestion to you is if you are seeking to meet someone rather than wanting to know what not to do, surrender to the Lord and ask him to change you by his spirit into the man he wants you to be. He knows everything about you and where you may miss the mark and what your weaknesses may be. When you allow him to change you (this is a process and takes time) then he will bring the right woman across your path.
Note you do not have to be perfect but someone who is totally surrendered to him and not wanting to be in control is someone he can work on and change. In this process you can meet someone. Problem is most of us haven't totally surrendered and am wanting to be in control ourselves, trying to change on our imperfections in the flesh which will not last especially when trials or difficulties hit. I am in the process of doing this myself.
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Well my reason is they were characters in whatever book I was reading at the time and when I finished the book the relationship was over.
There's also the he was imaginary and I finally outgrew imaginary friends.
But you're motivating me to start a new book soon so I can be in a steady (if brief because good book I'll finish in a day or two) relationship again.
There's also the he was imaginary and I finally outgrew imaginary friends.
But you're motivating me to start a new book soon so I can be in a steady (if brief because good book I'll finish in a day or two) relationship again.
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I am sorry Sculpt but the reasons were the ones already mentioned that you do not wish to hear.
My suggestion to you is if you are seeking to meet someone rather than wanting to know what not to do, surrender to the Lord and ask him to change you by his spirit into the man he wants you to be. He knows everything about you and where you may miss the mark and what your weaknesses may be. When you allow him to change you (this is a process and takes time) then he will bring the right woman across your path.
Note you do not have to be perfect but someone who is totally surrendered to him and not wanting to be in control is someone he can work on and change. In this process you can meet someone. Problem is most of us haven't totally surrendered and am wanting to be in control ourselves, trying to change on our imperfections in the flesh which will not last especially when trials or difficulties hit. I am in the process of doing this myself.
My suggestion to you is if you are seeking to meet someone rather than wanting to know what not to do, surrender to the Lord and ask him to change you by his spirit into the man he wants you to be. He knows everything about you and where you may miss the mark and what your weaknesses may be. When you allow him to change you (this is a process and takes time) then he will bring the right woman across your path.
Note you do not have to be perfect but someone who is totally surrendered to him and not wanting to be in control is someone he can work on and change. In this process you can meet someone. Problem is most of us haven't totally surrendered and am wanting to be in control ourselves, trying to change on our imperfections in the flesh which will not last especially when trials or difficulties hit. I am in the process of doing this myself.
I did ask you about the last two men you decided to stop seeing... I am sorry they involved cheating, violence or drugs, rough sign of the times I suppose. I would assume sometime in your entire life you decided to stop seeing a guy for a reasons other than cheating, violence or drugs? Can you remember what the reason(s) was? Maybe it's a reason you had in your past that you wouldn't have now.
Sounds fascinating, Cinder. You know I thought you were a dude until this post you wrote. Some people date like people are books, in the sense it's just for company and fun. I know because peeps have told me that. In fact one the ladies I dated wanted to keep seeing me for company and fun, including romantic contact. It's interesting behavior.
Sculpt, thank you. I completely get why you want to understand the WHY, I just think we aren't always going to have a why and sometimes it's because there isn't a specific reason.
I do disagree, sometimes "wasn't meant to be" really isn't covering any other reason. I know you want it to be so, but sometimes there isn't a specific reason. If only there were, then we could in theory fix it and make it work, but truly, sometimes things just aren't meant to be. We don't even need to know or understand why. I really love Ruby's post. Her last paragraph is so true.
I'll answer your question about why (though it's not anonymous, if I'm openly sharing it to everyone under my name). It ended because it should have never started. I know that doesn't really help.
I wish you the very best on your path of figuring it out. Perhaps one day you'll be able to talk with them more about it. If that happens, take what they say as truth.
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