What's stifling your romantic streak?

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Arlene89

Guest
#21
I was listening on a sermon while on a treadmill at the gym today and the pastor cracked a joke that made me laugh out loud so much that everybody at the gym was looking at me hahaha.
I had the exact same moment two weeks ago, like you, at the gym on the treadmill. The only thing is, I wasn't listening to anything, I just thought of a really funny joke I wanted to tell someone and lost it with the giggles. I then tried to cover it up by pretending to cough but it just didn't work. I was on the brink of tears, people watched on. Hahaha.
 
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JustAnotherUser

Guest
#22
I think it's rare for there to be true love but not as to how I see it in Romeo and Juliet. Of course back when that story took place things were different, but if you honestly were 'in love' with someone overnight and want to marry the next day, 'why' would that be? Because you saw someone and thought 'Wow! i'm in love!' sort of thing? Keep in mind Romeo was in love with another woman before Juliet and when realizing he couldn't have her he thought he wasn't going to love again... Two seconds later, bam.

Many confuse love with lust and that passion is over dedication. We can sort of get the idea as to why people confuse love with lust, it's still pretty much taught today that if you find attraction in someone then you 'must' be in love no questions asked.

And really, what do I know? I'm just a very skeptical person on certain subjects and not willing to just jump the gun until I find in any shape or form that it can be real. Maybe that's why I wouldn't be getting anywhere. I'm just tired of the whole 'But I love her!' or 'I love him!' bull and then those very people find someone else and the cycle continues again. For the most part I think we lost the original definition of love.
 

Markum1972

Senior Member
Mar 25, 2013
1,165
32
48
#23
I think it's rare for there to be true love but not as to how I see it in Romeo and Juliet. Of course back when that story took place things were different, but if you honestly were 'in love' with someone overnight and want to marry the next day, 'why' would that be? Because you saw someone and thought 'Wow! i'm in love!' sort of thing? Keep in mind Romeo was in love with another woman before Juliet and when realizing he couldn't have her he thought he wasn't going to love again... Two seconds later, bam.

Many confuse love with lust and that passion is over dedication. We can sort of get the idea as to why people confuse love with lust, it's still pretty much taught today that if you find attraction in someone then you 'must' be in love no questions asked.

And really, what do I know? I'm just a very skeptical person on certain subjects and not willing to just jump the gun until I find in any shape or form that it can be real. Maybe that's why I wouldn't be getting anywhere. I'm just tired of the whole 'But I love her!' or 'I love him!' bull and then those very people find someone else and the cycle continues again. For the most part I think we lost the original definition of love.
Adam saw Eve and immediately said "Wow!" The difference was Eve was a one of a kind; there were no other women. However that doesn't meant that it can't happen. Today most people will tell you that the "Wow" reaction is not love. I disagree. I have met people that have met like that as well as people that haven't met like that. Neither side is more successful than the other although the "love at first sight" couples are met with much more resistance from others. Culture today will accept a couple that was living together for 2 years before getting married more than a couple that married 3 months after meeting one another. It's a shame that culture supports the longer you "test drive" a person, the more success they will have.
When Jesus and John were in the womb, they lept in the wombs when coming near to one another. People also do this in their spirits as well. Most people are just not aware of it and even fear this response for a lack of understanding it. Love is not only the initial reaction though, it is the follow up. Love endures all things. To say "well, they didn't stay together cause they only knew one another for a few months before marrying" is foolishness. A different excuse is needed for the two that knew each other for years. The fact is, failure in either case is a lack of "enduring ALL things".
We need to teach people (especially our children) how to end the selfishness and begin to walk in love.
 
J

JustAnotherUser

Guest
#24
I'm not necessarily saying that they have to live together in order for it to work. But it does to an extent take time for you to know if the person is right for you and you are able to spend a life with the other person. That decision is life changing and committing, not something that you should throw away the next second and change your mind on. You can't rely on someone who looks at someone and thinks based on their attraction that they're 'in love' just like that. If it ever has worked on someone then I just say good for them. There's a huge difference from the reference of Romeo and Juliet when people define love off of it and saying that a person only knew someone for a few months and then say they're in love.

Adam and Eve were technically the first of humans that were roaming the earth, right? What other choice would they have had than to be attracted towards one another?

Sorry but I feel like it was taken out of proportion and putting in things that I never intended to say within my original post. I do think it does take time and taking the time doesn't mean it's always bound to base on the things a Christian would be against. I don't see how just attraction alone would turn into 'true love' just like that.
 
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iTOREtheSKY

Guest
#25
I guess I'd have to say distance? I dunno...I mean you can still be romantic from far away. I suppose I did it for the first 2 years I was dating my ex-wife...she was in the UK & I here in the US. It's always nicer to tell someone you love them in person though,or to hug them,hold hands,etc.
 
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thimsrebma

Guest
#26
My Venn Diagram:

View attachment 77260

In the first circle are the women I am attracted to.

In the second circle are the women who are attracted to me.
I laughed so hard when I saw your post. Unfortunately, I think that is my same experience with men.
 
A

Arlene89

Guest
#27
I think it's rare for there to be true love but not as to how I see it in Romeo and Juliet. Of course back when that story took place things were different, but if you honestly were 'in love' with someone overnight and want to marry the next day, 'why' would that be? Because you saw someone and thought 'Wow! i'm in love!' sort of thing? Keep in mind Romeo was in love with another woman before Juliet and when realizing he couldn't have her he thought he wasn't going to love again... Two seconds later, bam.

Many confuse love with lust and that passion is over dedication. We can sort of get the idea as to why people confuse love with lust, it's still pretty much taught today that if you find attraction in someone then you 'must' be in love no questions asked.

And really, what do I know? I'm just a very skeptical person on certain subjects and not willing to just jump the gun until I find in any shape or form that it can be real. Maybe that's why I wouldn't be getting anywhere. I'm just tired of the whole 'But I love her!' or 'I love him!' bull and then those very people find someone else and the cycle continues again. For the most part I think we lost the original definition of love.

Romeo and Juliette may not be the best reference when it comes to -romance-, but just because it is a worldwide known story, I threw it in there, also accompanied by perhaps a much better romance reference, the story of Ruth and Boaz. Although Romeo and Juliette at first glance may seem lust driven, I don't know, I question whether that's entirely it (I honestly haven't read the book nor watched the movie in such a long time, trying to grapple what I can remember of it). One thing that stands out for me about the story is the sacrifice, the setting aside of title and family to pursue love.

Arguably, it was an unhealthy relationship since they were obsessed with each other (okay, maybe that is lust of the flesh), and that they would rather die than live with out the other, but the angle I was heading towards was the idea of pursuit and stepping out in boldness, which is what I think about when I think of the story of Romeo and Juliette.

(Oh no, here comes Arlene, sharing her life story again)

Before I gave my life to the Lord, I had a cement heart. I concluded romance was a joke, love did not exist, joy was long forgotten and hope was out of reach. Love did not exist, what happened between a man and a woman was a game of "who's going to come out of the better end of this relationship with less scars". That's all I believed. Life was a story of mind games, walls and survival. In my most desperate hour, I cried out to God and confessed how much I needed Him to be my one and only Saviour.

My first impression of God was that He was this tyrant who couldn't wait to step on me when ever I did something wrong. If I step out of line, He's going to take His love away at the drop of a penny and discard me. My biggest revelation about who He is, is that He has a romantic side. God longs for us and pursues us, His love is relentless, He aches for our affections and endures the suffering as He watches and waits for us to turn our gaze to Him. In turn, in realising we are so loved, we too step out in boldness and declare our love to Him, we in turn pursue Him for we were loved first, and we openly declare our love and longing for Him as we raise our hands in worship, as we sing to Him in song from our open lips or from the hidden places of our hearts or whether in prayer.

I believe the ultimate love story is between us and our God. But... a romance that reflects (but never undermines or overtakes) this relationship can occur between man and woman as well. As people who were made in the image and likeness of God, I believe we too have that romantic streak.

I believe men reflect the warrior, conqueror, protector side of God's nature, while women are more inclined to reflect His merciful, compassionate side and to be a reflection of inward beauty. Beauty (of personality, character, etc.) is something that desires to be protected and preserved. Beauty provokes courage and boldness in the hearts of men and requires to be pursued and nourished. (These are things I've been reading about lately, trying to make some broad reference to books like 'Captivating', 'Wild at heart', and 'Kiss the girls and make them cry', but the thing about my brain is that in jumbles things up and regurgitates it in ways that may not always make sense, I hope this does ;P)

We live in a world filled pain and suffering, which creates walls around our hearts in order to protect ourselves . We are all well acquainted with rejection and heart ache. We love people with broken hearts or even if we receive new hearts through Christ, we still express love with a hint of our fallen nature.

But experiencing God's kind of love makes me believe that a romantic story may possibly unfold in my life. Not because a man should become my God or should replace God's rightful place, but because God restores, and He regenerates, and He presses more of Himself in to us so we reflect more of Him. I don't think romance is dead. I've been deeply wounded and hurt by family, by loved ones, by friends, but God awakened romance in me, and it makes me want to see more of Him in my world. I want to love like He does, and I want to be surrounded by people that love like He does. Therefore I believe that kind of story can be in my life.

I probably have a lot more to clarify but my eyeballs are hurting and I've kept still for way too long.
 

Markum1972

Senior Member
Mar 25, 2013
1,165
32
48
#28
I'm not necessarily saying that they have to live together in order for it to work. But it does to an extent take time for you to know if the person is right for you and you are able to spend a life with the other person. That decision is life changing and committing, not something that you should throw away the next second and change your mind on. You can't rely on someone who looks at someone and thinks based on their attraction that they're 'in love' just like that. If it ever has worked on someone then I just say good for them. There's a huge difference from the reference of Romeo and Juliet when people define love off of it and saying that a person only knew someone for a few months and then say they're in love.

Adam and Eve were technically the first of humans that were roaming the earth, right? What other choice would they have had than to be attracted towards one another?

Sorry but I feel like it was taken out of proportion and putting in things that I never intended to say within my original post. I do think it does take time and taking the time doesn't mean it's always bound to base on the things a Christian would be against. I don't see how just attraction alone would turn into 'true love' just like that.
I wasn't attacking nor criticizing what you said. I clicked "reply" because it inspired me to thought. Remember this one thing though... skeptic is a synonym of the words doubt and unbelief. My hope for you is that you don't harden your heart and miss that spark if it happens by your way. :cool:
 

cinder

Senior Member
Mar 26, 2014
4,425
2,416
113
#29
Hmmmmm. Now that I'm thinking about it, Ruth and Boaz doesn't work for me as a "romance". The story in brief goes:

Ruth is devoted enough to God that she leaves her homeland and moves back with Naomi to a Jewish town at the beginning of the harvest. These two destitute widow women need to eat and the one provision God has given in the law is gleaning (harvesting what the harvesters leave). Ruth starts doing this and happens to be doing it in the field of one of Naomi's relatives (Boaz). He hears about what Ruth has done and shows kindness to this defenseless foreign woman. He doesn't seem to have any intent of marrying her though.

Naomi knows Ruth needs a husband and knows that Boaz is one of the people who is obligated by God's law (the whole kinsman redeemer thing) to consider marrying her. So when harvest time ends and Boaz still hasn't done anything, she tells Ruth to get dressed up, crawl into his "bed" at the threshing floor, and ask him to fulfill his responsibilities under the law. That finally gives him the impetus he needs to take care of things, and they do marry.

There's honor, devotion, goodness, and duty here. But I can't say I see it as a particularly romantic story, the account never says that Ruth and Boaz loved one another.
 

rachelsedge

Senior Member
Oct 15, 2012
3,659
81
48
34
#30
I think for me, it's the fact that there is no one here I'm romantically interested in, nor do I forsee any changes in that at the moment. :cool:/:(
 

DuchessAimee

Senior Member
Apr 27, 2011
3,922
129
63
#32
I think it's rare for there to be true love but not as to how I see it in Romeo and Juliet. Of course back when that story took place things were different, but if you honestly were 'in love' with someone overnight and want to marry the next day, 'why' would that be? Because you saw someone and thought 'Wow! i'm in love!' sort of thing? Keep in mind Romeo was in love with another woman before Juliet and when realizing he couldn't have her he thought he wasn't going to love again... Two seconds later, bam.

Many confuse love with lust and that passion is over dedication. We can sort of get the idea as to why people confuse love with lust, it's still pretty much taught today that if you find attraction in someone then you 'must' be in love no questions asked.

And really, what do I know? I'm just a very skeptical person on certain subjects and not willing to just jump the gun until I find in any shape or form that it can be real. Maybe that's why I wouldn't be getting anywhere. I'm just tired of the whole 'But I love her!' or 'I love him!' bull and then those very people find someone else and the cycle continues again. For the most part I think we lost the original definition of love.


First, Romeo and Juliet is about a couple of spoiled teenagers who died because Romeo was impatient and had a bad memory. Juliet died because she was immature. Second, 6 people died in that play. All over nothing.

True love looks NOTHING like that. True love is long standing and kind; it isn't stupid or proud. The bible is VERY clear what love looks like. You can't base your life on what the world says about love. Hell, you can't base your life on what your own heart says about love! The actual definition of love is 1 Corinthians 13.
 

rachelsedge

Senior Member
Oct 15, 2012
3,659
81
48
34
#33
I guess I should clarify my answer a bit, because I've had romantic interests here and there in my life (none I've been very seriously interested in, though) in the past. I don't act because of personal beliefs, as well as insecurities due to past events and experiences, as well as present insecurities/beliefs. I can explain further, but that's all for the time being since I'm on my phone and would rather not type it all out on here. :)

Also, DuchessAimee, I love your signature line, ha.
 
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Arlene89

Guest
#34
Alright guys. Lets just get one thing clear here. Referring to 'Romeo and Juliette' was a really big doozy on my part. My bad. But I'm not going to back down from Ruth and Boaz and say that wasn't romantic.
 
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Arlene89

Guest
#35
Excuse while I get my shield and sword ready. *Ducks*
 
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DarlinNadia

Guest
#36
Lack of a Target.
 

Pipp

Majestic Llamacorn
Sep 17, 2013
5,542
2,720
113
Georgia
#40
easier to travel by car then by anything else. so as long as they are at least in the US or Canada it is possible.
lol well look at you knocking all my excuses out from under me.