Hi Laughingheart,
These are wonderfully insightful questions that I will have to keep tucked in the back of my mind for next time.
I should have clarified in the OP that the person I was talking about is "adopted" just to me and in my heart -- his mom is my childhood best friend, making us "sisters", so I just call him my nephew. He was raised by, lives with, and is very much loved by his biological family.
Unfortunately, I don't get to spend much time with them so the last couple of days, he was following me around, asking a lot of questions about my life. He wanted to know why I didn't have the same life that his family had (married with kids) and he was starting to question why my life had turned out so differently, and would he end up like his parents, or like Aunt Seoul?
When I said in the OP that I asked God to please not turn me into a cliche -- I won't be the one giving happy euphemisms about how God is out there "preparing the right person for you," as has been told to me hundreds of times and as I read over and over on forums such as this. I know it's cheerful advice that sounds faith-based, but it also has no Scriptural bearing.
God might very well be doing that. But, He might very well NOT be doing that either, and no one is guaranteed that "right person." When I was younger, I didn't think there were any alternatives to getting married and having a family, so that reality that God might take my life a different route has been difficult for me to accept.
I also never thought I'd be in a position where others might look to my life as an example of how to live, because I always felt like my life had turned out to be a failure (according to various Christian expectations.) This young person's questions were a jolt back into reality, because I realized that no matter what my situation was, people were looking at it, and I have to really dig in and let God use it as a testimony instead of my usual temptations to drown in sorrow.