It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.....
Mosestarian Chieftain, Moses the Young (er) (May his Chiefdom be returned and his [female] enemies' lipstick smudged in a messy but amusing fashion) has had somewhat of a harrowing week, what, with the defection of his chief spy, the implementation of Democracy in Mosestaria, the defeat of the Mosestarian navy by an innumerable band of Shittimistanian apes arriving on environmentally-unfriendly flotsam and jetsam provided by the President of Lanolinland (wherever that is!), and worst of all, the subsequent annexation of Mosestaria by Rubylander upstart, terrorist, and self-proclaimed La Madame President.
It all started when famous Mosestarian diplomat and businessman, Jomés Band - codename 00007.1, infiltrated the terrorist network of La Madame President. He naturally fell for one of the beautiful, red-lipsticked accomplices of the terrorist leader in a selfless effort for Chief and Chiefdom, but what he didn't realise was that the day after he befriended said terrorist, the nefarious Rubylander Intelligence Agency swapped name-badges with his beloved and the Wicked Witch of Jennymaesia (not to be confused with the Empress of Jennymaesia, although Mosestarians consider any confusion between the two to be completely understandable). Now, poor Jomés Band feels honour bound to continue said friendship with the wicked crone, instead of the red-lipsticked accomplice who captured his heart.
Meanwhile in Mosestaria, Mosestarian Chieftain, Moses the Young (er) (May his long beard grow ever longer) was implementing Democracy, after a cunning but dangerous suggestion made by the Empress of Jennymaesia. Obviously, it had to be done by postal vote due to Rubylander-spead fear-mongering about a monkey-pox virus, but the vote was quite successful. Of the 81 or so million Mosestarian voters, all 162 million votes received were in favour of Moses the Young (er) (May his hair be never gray) continuing his Chieftainship, a clear indication of just how strongly the Mosestarian people love their leader.
Unfortunately, it was all part of an elaborate scheme to invade Mosestaria, as during the course of the festivities celebrating Mosestaria's embracement of Democracy and the election of Moses the Young (er), an Axis of Evil - invaders from Jennymaesia, Shittimistan and the badlands formerly known as Rubyland - arrived, overthrowing the rightful leadership of Mosestaria and driving their esteemed leader to take refuge deep undergound - in a basement, no less!
1
1
1
