Sitting here trying to prioritize things...
In my head, I know what's most important. In my heart, I know what ought to come first. But getting those things to be at the top of my list, physically, in a tangible manner...
Why is that so difficult?
When I break it down, on paper, and look at where I put the bulk of my time and energy...it's not good. It's not what I know needs to be first, second, third...and I struggle with really knowing how to change it. Sure, it sounds easy- just do it, change it, just simply start putting the important things ahead of everything else, why is that such a big deal?
I think that's maybe the real issue here- why I avoid doing what I know is right, why I feel such an aversion to switching my priorities around.
On a completely unrelated note, it's time to figure out where to put more Christmas decorations. My husband used to make fun of me (not in a mean way) for being so into Christmas. But this year, he's so happy me and the kids are home, he keeps surprising me with new Christmas decorations when he comes home from work, and saying how sorry he is that he made fun of me before.
Which leads me to another topic...forgiveness. Only through Christ could I have come this far, as far as forgiving my husband...and myself. Things I thought I would never get over, I find myself rarely thinking of, and when I do, it's more as though I'm looking through a window at someone else's life; I feel sad, remembering, but it doesn't affect me, doesn't fill me with anger like it used to.
I don't usually get all gushy about spiritual stuff (which, I mean, there's nothing wrong with that, it's just not how I am), but it's hard not to when I can see so clearly what God's done for me and my family. It's beyond amazing, and I'm grateful.
Anyway...right, time to Christmasize the place.