I think I should've defined what I meant by anti-sex - I simply mean that sex or sexuality between a couple has to be just so (in marriage, certain acts or positions not allowed even in marriage, some say). I mean by anti-sex is that the hearts does not matter in these things - what matters is whether or not man has approved of it, and put his stamp of approval on it. And the inconsistancy in that is using Genesis as a model for marriage. Because there is no external approval.
You can't tell a couple's spiritual state and any superficiality on whether or not they are chaste outside of marriage. Because a lot of times, that's how these things sound to me. That lovemaking is not lovemaking between the couple and God - man has to approve of it, and bring the state in as well. To me that's anti-sex, because, imo, pure love between a couple doesn't need man's approval.
Now do I think there should be a ceremony? Yes, but I'm not going to judge another couple on simply the basis of living together or engaging in sex. Iow, this is not a black and white issue to me. I think that if your conscious says to be chaste, you do that. I am with the previous poster, in that I don't see hard Scripture, once scrunitized, that forbids intimacy before marriage - all the way or not. This is a case by case issue, so yes, I will sound contradictory... But then, I don't pretend to be absolute in my thinking, either.
I think young men and women should be given the choice to know what different doctrines there are concerning sex - why, one church father thought that sex even in marriage defiled it. There's been extreme views through the Church's history, even by our Puritian leftover standards.
I just personally feel that young people often feel stifled when given only one path, only one way of thinking, esp concerning something so intimate and engrained in us.... which, I still wonder why we are given urges, that we are told are good and healthy, and yet what is good is not good, not now. If anything is a contradiction, that is.
It really doesn't make sense to preach an absolute, black and white morality, then say "your urges are good and given by God, but they are bad and can cause you to sin." How is that absolute? That's like doubletalk. And if you then say "urges only good in marriage" then you suggest that God doesn't regard our own urges as good or bad, but determined by marriage.
I don't think it's unreasonable to want an answer for this. I'm willing to wager many young Christians wonder this, but won't ask because of the very nature of how Christians approach this and rebuke/condemn anyone who thinks otherwise. It's not healthy, in my opinion, yet that's how sex is treated oftentimes - you have standard things you can say and ask, but don't present any hard questions about it. Just have faith.
I wanted to address the "pet" thing. I comment elsewhere, if you mean I stick exclusively to this topic. But it is a soft spot of sorts, and I don't like these with their wings over the babes oversimplifing this topic. Just as you don't like me suggesting anything other than not to think about sex until you're married. The more simple you make, I think, the more the young person struggles in private. Because it's not a simple thing. When you have a whole medial disciplinary branch dedicated to the study and advising of sex in on its own right, yeah, it's not a simple thing.
If you mean I have an agenda? Well, no. I like to discuss and share and hear experiences. I think some people have benefited and liked some things I posted here - I even got some reputation points on this thread.
And so far as making up my own logic or something... I'm going to sound crass here, and although I'm sure many agree with you - if you just don't want to interact because you just don't want to be bothered with hard questions, just come out and say that. Please don't paint me a troublemaker because you just would rather not answer anything.
I have a really overactive mind, I'm always thinking of ideas and concepts, and I am a wordy writer, I write long reflections by habit. Please don't take my natural means of internet communication as evidence of obsession. Thank you
You can't tell a couple's spiritual state and any superficiality on whether or not they are chaste outside of marriage. Because a lot of times, that's how these things sound to me. That lovemaking is not lovemaking between the couple and God - man has to approve of it, and bring the state in as well. To me that's anti-sex, because, imo, pure love between a couple doesn't need man's approval.
Now do I think there should be a ceremony? Yes, but I'm not going to judge another couple on simply the basis of living together or engaging in sex. Iow, this is not a black and white issue to me. I think that if your conscious says to be chaste, you do that. I am with the previous poster, in that I don't see hard Scripture, once scrunitized, that forbids intimacy before marriage - all the way or not. This is a case by case issue, so yes, I will sound contradictory... But then, I don't pretend to be absolute in my thinking, either.
I think young men and women should be given the choice to know what different doctrines there are concerning sex - why, one church father thought that sex even in marriage defiled it. There's been extreme views through the Church's history, even by our Puritian leftover standards.
I just personally feel that young people often feel stifled when given only one path, only one way of thinking, esp concerning something so intimate and engrained in us.... which, I still wonder why we are given urges, that we are told are good and healthy, and yet what is good is not good, not now. If anything is a contradiction, that is.
It really doesn't make sense to preach an absolute, black and white morality, then say "your urges are good and given by God, but they are bad and can cause you to sin." How is that absolute? That's like doubletalk. And if you then say "urges only good in marriage" then you suggest that God doesn't regard our own urges as good or bad, but determined by marriage.
I don't think it's unreasonable to want an answer for this. I'm willing to wager many young Christians wonder this, but won't ask because of the very nature of how Christians approach this and rebuke/condemn anyone who thinks otherwise. It's not healthy, in my opinion, yet that's how sex is treated oftentimes - you have standard things you can say and ask, but don't present any hard questions about it. Just have faith.
I wanted to address the "pet" thing. I comment elsewhere, if you mean I stick exclusively to this topic. But it is a soft spot of sorts, and I don't like these with their wings over the babes oversimplifing this topic. Just as you don't like me suggesting anything other than not to think about sex until you're married. The more simple you make, I think, the more the young person struggles in private. Because it's not a simple thing. When you have a whole medial disciplinary branch dedicated to the study and advising of sex in on its own right, yeah, it's not a simple thing.
If you mean I have an agenda? Well, no. I like to discuss and share and hear experiences. I think some people have benefited and liked some things I posted here - I even got some reputation points on this thread.
And so far as making up my own logic or something... I'm going to sound crass here, and although I'm sure many agree with you - if you just don't want to interact because you just don't want to be bothered with hard questions, just come out and say that. Please don't paint me a troublemaker because you just would rather not answer anything.
I have a really overactive mind, I'm always thinking of ideas and concepts, and I am a wordy writer, I write long reflections by habit. Please don't take my natural means of internet communication as evidence of obsession. Thank you
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