How much do you struggle with forgiveness? (anonymous POLL)

[SIMON55]

I consider myself very forgiving. I have forgiven some pretty serious offenses against me and feel no ill feelings towards the individuals. My ex-husband cheated and lied to me consistently and after 6 years of marriage he ended up leaving me for someone else. He's completely forgiven. I have zero ill feelings towards him. Sadly, he was recently arrested and will likely be spending the rest of his life in prison (he murdered his girl friend), but I have been praying for him. I am deeply saddened by the entire situation and I am hoping he comes to know God at some point in his life while he's in prison. My son's dad essentially used me, got me pregnant, and then bailed. He is not involved in my son's life, but we do keep in touch. Zero hard feelings against him. People close to me think I'm crazy for not hating him, but I really don't. We're all human. We all make mistakes and poor choices.

I think the only people I have a hard time forgiving is family. I come from a toxic, chaotic family and I do have bitterness still about it. My family has always treated me poorly and it's not much different now. We get along a little better for the sake of my son, but in general I only talk to them because they are family. They are not people I would ever associate with if they weren't.

I agree with others on here that it can be harder to forgive ourselves than others. That is so true.

Wow....what a blessing for you God protected you from the wrath of your X and he targeted someone else! You have had some real hurdles to overcome. Every child deserves to grow in a healthy environment and it amazes me the adversities some people have to face and overcome. IMHO There is NO excuse to mistreat children and no excuse to harm your significant other no matter what when the option of walking away even temporarily is always available. I had a spouse once I had to refuse to fight with the worse she became the longer or eventually the more days I stayed gone away and doing positive recreation and visiting family. A situation that you can't trust someone or be comfortable that they won't intentionally provoke hostility or explosive situations just isn't worth the stress to health.
God bless !😀

 

[SIMON55]

I didn't have siblings growing up and my parents never really violated my trust....so learning forgiveness was a slow process for me. I first had to learn that God would forgive me of all my mistakes.
Then I had to learn to forgive myself....Then I had to learn to allow others to be human also and that If God forgave my mistakes he forgave theirs also....and if he did I SHOULD!

 

[KnowMe]

How much (in general) do you struggle with forgiveness? On a scale of 1 to 5 (easy to difficult)

that’s a good question, during different seasons of life, all the above.

 

[Susanna]

My dad hurt me a lot when I was a kid. Not in the sense of any ill doing, but he was never there for us. He was busy everywhere else. I have no doubt he loved us, but he just couldn’t help it being a stranger you maybe met once in a while. I usually saw him in the newspapers, smiling at the camera, making sure everyone got to know what a fine supporter of the community he was. Yet he was the best dad ever when he occasionally showed up at home. I love him and I’ve forgiven him. Sometimes, when I’m visiting his resting place, I’ll bring a bottle of bourbon for him, and we throw ourselves a little party right there.

 

[JosephsDreams]

My dad was always working. He was very successful in creating and making a lot of money. As a kid I admired him for that and respected his work ethic. I beloved he sacrificed a lot for his family. His focus was work, not family. Even when he was home, he wasn't emotionally there.

As I aged into my middle years, my thoughts about him and how I viewed his motivations changed dramatically.
Looking back, I would have preferred we had grown up middle class, or even poor, and have him involved the way a parent should be, then how it actually shook out.
All the money in the world can't buy back those years.

It took me a while to come to terms with that.

With my wife having passed some years ago and my own memories about my childhood, I am especially sensitive to being here full time for my two pre-teen daughters. Fortunately God has blessed me financially so i can do that
.
Thank you Jesus for you forgiving us. Makes it impossible to not to forgive others.

 

[AuntieAnt]

All my life I have struggled with forgiving mean people who deceive, hurt, and have no mercy toward others. God knows it is not in my earthly power to forgive people who steal the joy of life in others for their own gain. I cannot forgive them in my flesh, it’s just impossible.

But not with God. I know by the faith of Jesus Christ that He died on the Cross for people who I have condemned in my thoughts and the Lord Jesus completely forgives them of every one of their sins. I know because He forgives me for all of my sins, which are no better. Maybe worse. That is the truth.

If I listen to my carnal thoughts (pride, ego), I start to believe I have a legit case against my enemies. And the harsh judgment I immerse myself in against them, I put myself in hellish bondage to as well. If I allow myself to think God’s forgiveness isn’t for all people, how can I believe with certainty His forgiveness toward me?

Yes, I struggle in my flesh with unforgiveness. My flesh is horrid! But I know I have been crucified with Jesus and can take on the mind of Christ and He makes me see the truth: He forgives those who sin against us and their sins are as far as the east is from the west. If we walk in this world not believing that, there’s our struggle.

The more we get into the habit of disregarding our ego and walk in the spirit of life in Christ Jesus, we can forgive as He does. And people will see the light of Jesus alive in us and will be drawn to Him. It’s all the work of Holy God and we only have to believe Him.

 

[TabinRivCA]

As my dad got into his very senior yrs he told me one day that my 'brother' had asked him to disown me. I had moved in w/my dad when I was split w/my 2nd husb for a few mos, but decided to go back to him. My dad cried but I had to do it and then my 'bro' moved in w/his 2 grown kids.
For yrs my 'bro' presented himself as a Christian and usually led fam prayers during holidays. I had forgotten what he asked my dad. As long as my dad was alive I could visit any time and if I needed something he was glad to help. However, due to poor care from my 'bro' I noticed my dad looking
glum, who was usually in a content mood. My 'bro' started brow-beating him and even hid his wallet one day. My dad was very prosperous, had a million $$ home, 2 pensions+SSA, assets and keepsakes, tools. My 'bro' took over his accts and tried to tell us my dad was broke.
My parents were the type who valued us 3 all the same. Everything had plus to b equal in gifts etc. My mom had passed awhile back and when my dad 'gave up the ghost' I'm sure he wanted to. I had always known I was to come into some $$ from the house plus the costly assets and keepsakes left.
A few days later I was informed that my 'bro' had my dad sign over the house to him and everything with it. He wanted to keep it all but I talked to him sternly and managed to get a measly $24,000 for me & my sis.
He kept telling me to wait on the estate and he'd let me know when to come down and pick out what I wanted. About 2 mos later my bro-in-law told me that 'bro' had sold everything and redone the house. I called my 'bro' and he said that wasn't true to come down w/a u-haul and pick up some stuff. What I found was the left-overs of an estate sale. He must have given things away bc all that was left for me was either broken or cheap n dirty. They had a home full of keep-sakes I grew up with and I didn't get a one.
I tell God I have forgiven him and I try, just sometimes something will remind me of my parent's goodness and the wrong that was committed by their son they had trusted. I don't mind the things or $$ so much as the disregard for my parents intentions. I could almost say my 'bro' broke every commandment in the book.
He's had hair plugs, facials of some kind and the whole house renovated, plus leasing cars and so forth. He has more 'looks' on his FB pg than a model (and not good ones). He'd love for me to now b nice to him but as it stands, I can forgive--trying to forget, love him but don't have to like him. I hope I get better re this.
I know this was long, if u made it through, lol. God bless.