Has the Church Helped in Teaching Sexual Purity?

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.

Has the Church Helped in Teaching Sexual Purity?

  • Yes

    Votes: 2 22.2%
  • Unsure

    Votes: 3 33.3%
  • Other

    Votes: 4 44.4%

  • Total voters
    9
  • Poll closed .

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
why arent people talking about rape here

Because women are raped in both marriage and outside of it.
Lets not pretend it doesnt happen.

Soldiers often rape women, its given that in many countries that a solidier has a right to rape any captive woman they please.
 

ThereRoseaLamb

Well-known member
Jan 17, 2023
4,764
2,045
113
why arent people talking about rape here

Because women are raped in both marriage and outside of it.
Lets not pretend it doesnt happen.

Soldiers often rape women, its given that in many countries that a solidier has a right to rape any captive woman they please.

In what manner do you think rape fits into the conversation?
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,227
9,292
113
In what manner do you think rape fits into the conversation?
She often goes off on tangents like this. You get used to it after a while. It's best to just let her play it out and not interrupt, and it will be over soon.
 

ThereRoseaLamb

Well-known member
Jan 17, 2023
4,764
2,045
113
Thank everyone who voted in the poll. I hadn't had the chance to come back and check till now. So I'm somewhat surprised. The majority it seems do not think the church is doing a good job on the topic of purity. Does anyone have ideas on how that can change? Is there a way the church can back up parents? It seems the church has just side stepped the issue altogether and left it in the hands of secular teachers. Is it any wonder kids are saying they aren't the right sex and want to be trans.
 

HealthAndHappiness

Well-known member
Jul 7, 2022
10,235
4,289
113
Almost Heaven West Virginia
Thank everyone who voted in the poll. I hadn't had the chance to come back and check till now. So I'm somewhat surprised. The majority it seems do not think the church is doing a good job on the topic of purity. Does anyone have ideas on how that can change? Is there a way the church can back up parents? It seems the churches has just side stepped the issue altogether and left it in the hands of secular teachers. Is it any wonder kids are saying they aren't the right sex and want to be trans.

I think most pastors are scared of losing members of their congregation. If they preach on sin, they won't get or maintain numbers. Brought this up to an Evangelical mega church pastor during a college, career single discussion on the topic. We all probably realized that there were gf/ bf living together that the uncomfortable subject might turn away. However, I Corinthians 5 if I remember right is a list from railers to fornicators and proper response.
Here
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
In what manner do you think rape fits into the conversation?
because most girls are raped/molested from puberty up or harassed at high school, university and in workplaces. Doesnt matter if they Christian or not its a common experience. Date rape is also common.
so how do they stay 'pure' when many older boys and men are chasing them, leering at them all the time. sOmetimes it can be life or death, if girls dont give in, or have nowhere to flee?

And this also happens even in marriages.

what about the those who become christians after they have already been defiled/violated? What happens to these girls? Or are they 'tainted' and shunned.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
within marriages some dont respect a wifes privacy or days when she does not want to sleep with her husband (shes menstruating or whatever) or they want her to do things she does not want to do but they saw it on a porn show so they think its ok, but she may feel its degrading.

Does a husband have a right to rape his wife and get her to do things she does not want to do in bed?

Im just saying that for married couples we have this idea that all sex in that relationship is loving....but outside of it, like the porn thing, they are doing it for the money, show, etc and sex there does not equal love. Sometimes its all about power over anothers body and that power can be abused.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
Theres so many churches where theres couples 'living in sin' meaning they are not married yet sleeping together and have children already or remarried and I also know many who eacaped marriages (even married in church) because of sexual abuse.

the other thing that people turn a blind eye to sexual abuse of minors in church, though catholic priests were notoriusly guilty of that, it also happens in other churches, so nobody is really safe from predators even in church...Im just saying. Ive also had those experiences and you either go to church and get harassed or stay home and not go to church because the elders are not going to do anything about it.
 

HealthAndHappiness

Well-known member
Jul 7, 2022
10,235
4,289
113
Almost Heaven West Virginia
I think most pastors are scared of losing members of their congregation. If they preach on sin, they won't get or maintain numbers. Brought this up to an Evangelical mega church pastor during a college, career single discussion on the topic. We all probably realized that there were gf/ bf living together that the uncomfortable subject might turn away. However, I Corinthians 5 if I remember right is a list from railers to fornicators and proper response.
Here
PS:
One church I attended for years was a mix of spiritual believers walking with the Lord and carnal Christians. I appreciate the many who attended that I had a chance to connect with. But I was surprised how many lost unbelievers seemed to not only attend, but also enter leadership positions. I couldn't appreciate that. For example,
I observed a feminist that was kicked out of their apartment by her ex boyfriend who taught the single ladies for a time.
There was also a lesbian pagan who infiltrated a ministry as an assistant teacher too, just to name a couple.
I think I already mentioned the promiscuous Catholic guy who volunteered to lead a group. He was just there to fornicate.
This mess happens way too easily by permissive leadership. The alternative is a strong leader who is judged as harsh for making the tough decisions and teaching / preaching in a clear Biblical manner as prevents those issues and sets the church standards apart from the world.

The Churches would be stronger and the Lord could bless them if they obeyed His Word by preaching the whole council and the occasional church discipline when necessary. However, restoration is the purpose as seen from that extreme example in I Corinthians chapter 5 and I I Corinthians .

I saw an extremely permissive AnaBaptist church online while looking for the latest on that denomination. After watching it, I thought immediately of how much they embraced the LGBPEDO "community" and the worldly idea of bringing them all into that church. I said to myself immediately that that environment would become the haven for sodomites and staff to do the unnatural things they do. This kind of church is going to also be a horrible place for solid marriages and whole families.



To answer your question and provide the example above.....
"Has the Church Helped in Teaching Sexual Purity?

Answer:. Those kind of churches are Not, but they are becoming more popular every year.

Fortunately, there are other Baptist and evangelical churches that have extremely low divorce rates, and produce families who are exceptionally strong and healthy. Those are in the vast minority, but they do exist AND they are reaching the world with the gospel, which is the love of Christ. Yes, there are churches that preach purity and marriage for life.
 

HealthAndHappiness

Well-known member
Jul 7, 2022
10,235
4,289
113
Almost Heaven West Virginia
Theres so many churches where theres couples 'living in sin' meaning they are not married yet sleeping together...
the other thing that people turn a blind eye to sexual abuse of minors in church, though catholic priests were notoriusly guilty of that, it also happens in other churches, so nobody is really safe from predators even in church...Im just saying. Ive also had those experiences and you either go to church and get harassed or stay home and not go to church because the elders are not going to do anything about it.


I know of churches that take precautions against that. Those churches are labeled by the LGBPEDO folks as "hate groups" and all kinds of names that I can't repeat. The world hates those Christians.

On the other hand there are a lot more examples like the one above that is loved by the world, the perverse and the Devil. This is the kind that you are talking about...
V
Charges of Sexual Assault
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
I dont think churches are teaching healthy marriage bed interactions if couples are resorting to viewing porn in order to relate to one another

some of those sexual practices are damaging and even dangerous because they are NOT loving they are abusive
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
I know of some churches where the minister had affair with the secretary
They had to remove this minister, and then acting ones came in. Theres also churches where the pastors wife shock horror worked a JOB and that was seen as a no no. She was nurse and went to out to work and that meant she negelected her children. She was meant to stay at home. Supposedly the pastors salary was meant to be enough to support the whole family but maybe they had too many children or it wasnt enough I dont know.

I always thought in 1 timothy if it was a Bishop he was meant to only have one wife and possibly be a grandparent as by then his children would have grown up and he wouldnt be dependent on the church to provide for all his children. But many churches these days have very young pastors fresh out of bible school. They dont have the life experience or years of faith to see through good times and bad.
 

ThereRoseaLamb

Well-known member
Jan 17, 2023
4,764
2,045
113
I dont think churches are teaching healthy marriage bed interactions if couples are resorting to viewing porn in order to relate to one another

some of those sexual practices are damaging and even dangerous because they are NOT loving they are abusive

Ok this subject and question is totally within the church. Sexual purity and how it's taught within the church. I don't know any church that would recommend porn to help a marriage. So, within the church, what do you mean they are not teaching healthy marriage bed interactions?
 

ThereRoseaLamb

Well-known member
Jan 17, 2023
4,764
2,045
113
because most girls are raped/molested from puberty up or harassed at high school, university and in workplaces. Doesnt matter if they Christian or not its a common experience. Date rape is also common.
so how do they stay 'pure' when many older boys and men are chasing them, leering at them all the time. sOmetimes it can be life or death, if girls dont give in, or have nowhere to flee?
And this also happens even in marriages.
Ok but I'm talking about consensual relationships here.

what about the those who become christians after they have already been defiled/violated? What happens to these girls? Or are they 'tainted' and shunned.
I would consider that a private matter that would be dealt with in counseling before marriage.
 

ThereRoseaLamb

Well-known member
Jan 17, 2023
4,764
2,045
113
within marriages some dont respect a wifes privacy or days when she does not want to sleep with her husband (shes menstruating or whatever) or they want her to do things she does not want to do but they saw it on a porn show so they think its ok, but she may feel its degrading.
All that should be talked out in counseling before marriage. My husband and I did not want children, health issues, and we talked about that before marriage and it hasn't changed. Our pastor counseled us before marriage. But remember, the Bible says the two become one.



Does a husband have a right to rape his wife and get her to do things she does not want to do in bed?
No, I don't think any church would condone that. Again, that needs to be dealt with before marriage.


Im just saying that for married couples we have this idea that all sex in that relationship is loving....but outside of it, like the porn thing, they are doing it for the money, show, etc and sex there does not equal love. Sometimes its all about power over anothers body and that power can be abused.
If there is abuse in a marriage there needs to be counseling.
 

ThereRoseaLamb

Well-known member
Jan 17, 2023
4,764
2,045
113
Theres so many churches where theres couples 'living in sin' meaning they are not married yet sleeping together and have children already or remarried and I also know many who eacaped marriages (even married in church) because of sexual abuse.
But one doesn't excuse the other. Living in sin is living together without marriage. That's wrong, there's to "but", that fact stands alone.

the other thing that people turn a blind eye to sexual abuse of minors in church, though catholic priests were notoriusly guilty of that, it also happens in other churches, so nobody is really safe from predators even in church...Im just saying. Ive also had those experiences and you either go to church and get harassed or stay home and not go to church because the elders are not going to do anything about it.
But we're still at the "two wrongs don't make a right" part of the issue. I know my pastor, he's a personal friend, I've been in ministry with him so I wouldn't use him as an example, but if I knew that was happening in my church, something would be done. That person would see time in prison.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
Ok this subject and question is totally within the church. Sexual purity and how it's taught within the church. I don't know any church that would recommend porn to help a marriage. So, within the church, what do you mean they are not teaching healthy marriage bed interactions?
seoul mentioned that at a married couples church conference that the bill for cable porn was high when couples stayed there at the hotel

I dont know how she knows this, but that says something.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,227
9,292
113
Ok this subject and question is totally within the church. Sexual purity and how it's taught within the church. I don't know any church that would recommend porn to help a marriage. So, within the church, what do you mean they are not teaching healthy marriage bed interactions?
I was once like you. Trying to make sense out of what lanolin says, trying to get her to explain what she says, arguing with her about "facts" she made up...

I learned. One day you too will learn.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
But one doesn't excuse the other. Living in sin is living together without marriage. That's wrong, there's to "but", that fact stands alone.



But we're still at the "two wrongs don't make a right" part of the issue. I know my pastor, he's a personal friend, I've been in ministry with him so I wouldn't use him as an example, but if I knew that was happening in my church, something would be done. That person would see time in prison.
i think they dont get kicked out because these people are like the pastors family
I also know that in some liberal churches they bless the same sex unions because they are family members instead of disciplining them
adulterers generally leave church but they may go to another one
if they remarry in a church then that church must have turned a blind eye to it or forgiven it. I think the most famous example is when King Charles who married Camilla. Hed comitted adultery with her while he was married to Diana...everyone knows this now. Though he wouldnt have gone so far as to marry her when his first wife was still alive, and she was also married. Though HER first husband is still alive.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
Bathesheba and King David us a famous example from the Bible. She was bathing and he was spying on her and stole her from her husband, and also tried to kill him, she fell pregnant, but punishment was their child died. They eventually married and had King Solomon.

But was that thing consensual or was David a predator. Why didnt she say NO? Im married. Stop perving at me. Cos he was King? He bribed her? We dont know.