For laughs - What you Don’t Want to Hear On A First Date

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blueorchidjd

Guest
-So, you ready to do shots? I woke up with the WORST hangover this morning.
-You should check out this new eastern religion I'm studying up on!
-Oh that Jesus guy, he was some hippie right?

Only one statement says it all.
 

Misty77

Senior Member
Aug 30, 2013
1,746
45
0
-So, you ready to do shots? I woke up with the WORST hangover this morning.
-You should check out this new eastern religion I'm studying up on!
-Oh that Jesus guy, he was some hippie right?

Only one statement says it all.
I could probably get behind the shots idea
 

just_monicat

Senior Member
Jan 1, 2014
1,284
17
0
once i finish up the anger management classes, my weekends will be all yours.

my mother and i are very close. we like to hang out together at least once a week while she does my laundry.

so where was i? oh yeah, so after my marriage ended in a shambles, i pretty much gave up on life. but that was last week. i'm doing much better today!
 

posthuman

Senior Member
Jul 31, 2013
37,776
13,535
113
"you remind me of my husband. you should meet him sometime"
 
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Donkeyfish07

Guest
"you remind me of my husband. you should meet him sometime"
That reminds me of this time I was in line to return something at walmart. This pretty girl in a dress walks up to me and tells me I look like Fonzi (Not that I mind being compared to the Fonz, but for those who have seen me on cam.....I look nothing like Fonzie") she continues to make an effort to keep the conversation going, She's coming off as really flirty......then she mentions her husband. I'm like "What is this?.....I don't even......"
 

maxwel

Senior Member
Apr 18, 2013
9,526
2,608
113
True Story...

Once on a first date a girl told me she just got out of jail for stabbing an abusive guy with a fork.

I remember thinking, "A fork... hmmm... so she's the creative type. That's a plus."

: )
 

Pipp

Majestic Llamacorn
Sep 17, 2013
5,542
2,720
113
Georgia
"It's great to be out again after my gender swap operation "
 
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Richie_2uk

Guest
Breaking wind! Accidently or otherwise lol
 
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skeezer5840

Guest
1. You 'gonna eat that?
2. I forgot to use my dandruff shampoo earlier.
3. Oh, crap!! It's my ex wife!
 
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BananaPie

Guest
[video=youtube;xYTWPHHA_BA]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xYTWPHHA_BA[/video]
Give me a minute; it's my buddy.
...texting.

 
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BananaPie

Guest
Okay, you were saying?
[video=youtube;xYTWPHHA_BA]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xYTWPHHA_BA[/video]
Hold on; it's my buddy again.
...texting.

 
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BananaPie

Guest
Okay, sorry for that. He's so curious.
[video=youtube;xYTWPHHA_BA]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xYTWPHHA_BA[/video]
LOL. He says he wants to take you out on a date...
 

Pipp

Majestic Llamacorn
Sep 17, 2013
5,542
2,720
113
Georgia
Wouldn't wanna hear this...... Screenshot_2014-04-05-20-02-57-1.jpg