Marriage Advice Please

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
Jul 28, 2021
1,226
406
83
#41
The OP has not yet responded to a single post. Looks like it's a one and done.
I saw that. When I first read the OP I was thinking this sounds like a very tall tale. Maybe the OP just did it for laughs.
 

Genipher

Well-known member
Jan 6, 2019
2,300
1,715
113
#42
You're so much better at snark than I am. Look at you go! lol

It's just my opinion, but it doesn't appear to me that the OP thinks she needs permission to be totally pissed off at her "husband". Talk about regretting marrying someone. Unfortunately she has children with this creep, otherwise I'm sure she would have been gone long ago.
Well, my opinion obviously differs from yours. Christians are often made to believe we should never be angry. I'm reminding her that those feelings, in this situation, are justified.

And that wasn't snark. It was passive aggression because I know how much you LOVE the winking emoji. 🤪

Been moving houses and practically been on my feet for 5 days straight. Still have 2 more days of cleaning and livestock to move at the old home and I tweaked my neck wrong about an hour ago so I'm in pain, which makes me a little less...patient. My apologies if Im touchy and lash out.
 

1ofthem

Senior Member
Mar 30, 2016
3,729
1,921
113
#43
Maybe you are right. But I do not know why you connect one thing with another like someone who steals from companies would murder someone. You are drawing conclusions of one thing to another where I do not see the connection.
Are you really that sheltered and naive? Your comparisons make no sense and isn't relevant.

Put it this way, if you had a teen/child would you want to send him/her to a youth group with this man as the youth pastor.

How about letting your child get private counseling with this man?

Which is a part of what youth pastors do.

Does that sound like a good idea to you?
 
Jul 28, 2021
1,226
406
83
#44
Well, my opinion obviously differs from yours. Christians are often made to believe we should never be angry. I'm reminding her that those feelings, in this situation, are justified.

And that wasn't snark. It was passive aggression because I know how much you LOVE the winking emoji. 🤪

Been moving houses and practically been on my feet for 5 days straight. Still have 2 more days of cleaning and livestock to move at the old home and I tweaked my neck wrong so I'm in pain, which makes me a little less...patient. My apologies if Im touchy and lash out.
No need to apologize at all. I thought it was funny.

I'm not your average Christian as I'm sure you've figured out. I have no problem being angry when it is justified. Men are called to love their wives, not abuse them.

Ouch, neck tweaks are bad. I hope you work that out soon.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
42,665
17,120
113
69
Tennessee
#46
Well, my opinion obviously differs from yours. Christians are often made to believe we should never be angry. I'm reminding her that those feelings, in this situation, are justified.

And that wasn't snark. It was passive aggression because I know how much you LOVE the winking emoji. 🤪

Been moving houses and practically been on my feet for 5 days straight. Still have 2 more days of cleaning and livestock to move at the old home and I tweaked my neck wrong about an hour ago so I'm in pain, which makes me a little less...patient. My apologies if Im touchy and lash out.
I get the pain reference.
 
S

SophieT

Guest
#49
A judge would laugh at porn being an issue and let the father have unrestricted visitation. You really think, in this day and age, a judge will care that Aman watches porn and oggles other women? At most the phone snooping would get a slap on the wrist but that's it.

A friend of mine, years ago, discovered her daughter was being molested by her father and father's friends during her visitation. My friend took her ex to court for the abuse. Know what happened? Long story short, they questioned my FRIEND'S modest sexual habits and gave full custody to the father! She hasn't seen her daughter for 18 years now.

I didn't tell Kayeboo to smash her window or computer. I was just sharing that's how another woman handled it. In this case, Kayboos righteous indignation can be to put her foot down and say there will NOT be internet in her husband's hands or in their home! I was basically saying it's okay to be angry about this.
you are wrong

you gave some bad advice. just own it. it's ok ;)
 
S

SophieT

Guest
#51
I see she joined yesterday.
She having a bit of "fun" at our expense, perhaps?
you know, the thought also crossed my mind

we never know around here but we do want to help

there have been some real bizarre things from time to time....no harm in trying to be helpful

but if you want to really read something that is ridiculous? go see williejay on the first page

that's a mind bender right there o_O
 

Genipher

Well-known member
Jan 6, 2019
2,300
1,715
113
#52
I get the pain reference.
I always wanted to be the kind of person that was cheerful while in pain but...I'm not. I'm embarrassed to admit it but when I'm in pain, I tend to be less patient with the kids and lash out at the husband more than usual.

And I'm mad at myself because husband had to go back to work and I'm usually strong enough for this kind of work but now? Now I'm not sure if I can go out and continue. 😭
 
S

SophieT

Guest
#53
None of us are perfect. And he is not doing anything that is a public embarrassment to be brought to the church because he will not stop. What if he smoked would you say he is not qualified to be a pastor because he smokes? What about you and your wrongs? Are you not qualified to be a Christian because of your wrongs?

how bout murder willie-boy....cause porn is the murder of many a marriage and men have killed women while seeing them as sex objects instead of the human that God created
 

Genipher

Well-known member
Jan 6, 2019
2,300
1,715
113
#54
you are wrong

you gave some bad advice. just own it. it's ok ;)
I never advised to break anything.
My advice was fine. She needs to put her foot down and be firm. That's all I'm saying.

That is, if this is a real cry for help and not some vulgar joke.
 

JohnDB

Well-known member
Jan 16, 2021
6,282
2,561
113
#55
you are wrong

you gave some bad advice. just own it. it's ok ;)
Exactly...
Allowing juveniles to view pornography is considered sexual assault on a minor... even if it's a parent's pornography.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
42,665
17,120
113
69
Tennessee
#57
I always wanted to be the kind of person that was cheerful while in pain but...I'm not. I'm embarrassed to admit it but when I'm in pain, I tend to be less patient with the kids and lash put at the husband more than usual.

And I'm mad at myself because husband had to go back to work and I'm usually strong enough for this kind of work but mow? Now I'm not sure if I can go out and continue. 😭
I feel like you do every morning when I get out of bed. You have absolutely nothing to be embarrassed about. Facing a new day and dealing with what may come up is an act of courage, especially when you are in pain.
 
S

SophieT

Guest
#59
I never advised to break anything.
I just read where you are in pain etc..I never said that you did...but you did kind of hint at it

come on Genipher...I'm not having another back and forth with you where at the end you say it was cause you did not feel well

I'm stopping now. I actually do know what I am talking about when it comes to courts etc. all judges are not loons and a woman should not resort to violence except in self defense

hope you get to feeling better. moving is a huge job
 
Jul 28, 2021
1,226
406
83
#60
I always wanted to be the kind of person that was cheerful while in pain but...I'm not. I'm embarrassed to admit it but when I'm in pain, I tend to be less patient with the kids and lash out at the husband more than usual.

And I'm mad at myself because husband had to go back to work and I'm usually strong enough for this kind of work but now? Now I'm not sure if I can go out and continue. 😭
Don't be so hard on yourself. Get some rest.