Advice on mental health

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U

UnderGrace

Guest
#41
I hear you. I can testify that parenting is a thankless job. I too have made peace by committing to a higher purpose and a Lord who will reward me in the life to come.
Parenting is a rewarding and wonderful and yes a sacrificial responsibility.

Perhaps a deeper understanding of service and sacrificial love is needed.

No career, of which I have had a few different ones, even comes close to the role of being a parent.

I see the result of this mindset, the word to describe it is sad!...... smh
 
C

CandieM

Guest
#42
Here’s the problem... I suffer from depression, mood swings, anxiety, paranoia and fatigue. I am so overwhelmed and I hide it inside causing lots of pain and roadblocks for getting better. I tried a book of meds to help me and well I am at the point now where I can’t put one foot in front of the other without God’s help. I am not an obvious basket case, besides to myaelf... I’m stuck inside my brain a lot and I do understand how a lot of this emotion/psychology stuff works, and what causes certain parts of my mental health weaknesses. I pray and pray and pray and pray. 🙏
Do you ever feel like the increased wickedness in this world greatly impacts your mental disorders? Thought I'd ask.
 
Nov 26, 2012
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#43
Parenting is a rewarding and wonderful and yes a sacrificial responsibility.

Perhaps a deeper understanding of service and sacrificial love is needed.

No career, of which I have had a few different ones, even comes close to the role of being a parent.

I see the result of this mindset, the word to describe it is sad!...... smh
Trust me when I tell you that the last twenty years have been service and sacrifice. One of my four kids gave me a card for Fathers Day.
 
Oct 7, 2018
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#44
Parenting is a rewarding and wonderful and yes a sacrificial responsibility.

Perhaps a deeper understanding of service and sacrificial love is needed.

No career, of which I have had a few different ones, even comes close to the role of being a parent.

I see the result of this mindset, the word to describe it is sad!...... smh
Truer words couldn’t have been spoken, but if the mind is unhealthy, the ability to understand and feel this can go astray. My driving purpose to seek mental health is advice is knowing the love I have for my children isn’t being given or shown as it should. You suffer more when you know and fully feel the guilt your mental health has on those around you. ❤️ Blessed be the warrior mother.
 
Oct 7, 2018
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#45
Do you ever feel like the increased wickedness in this world greatly impacts your mental disorders? Thought I'd ask.
Of course. The wickedness of those around me, the way are world is and works... the way we are raised to believe certain things... everything is actually all wrong... but I have to trust that Gods perfect will is being done... no matter what people say to me, or how they make me feel... I have to overcome it and trust my Father. It’s hard for a person with trust issues though, it really is. But I’m this crazy scheme of things He is our only source of hope.
 
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UnderGrace

Guest
#46
Trust me when I tell you that the last twenty years have been service and sacrifice. One of my four kids gave me a card for Fathers Day.
Sad really,
North American culture has lost basic historical values, and replaced it with "I serve myself" and some children know little about respect and gratitude because they take their values from peers and pop culture, even what is taught at home can be over powered ......so I agree parenting is a fighting battle in this culture.
 
Oct 7, 2018
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#47
Trust me when I tell you that the last twenty years have been service and sacrifice. One of my four kids gave me a card for Fathers Day.
Yea, kids can be
Sad really,
North American culture has lost basic historical values, and replaced it with "I serve myself" and some children know little about respect and gratitude because they take their values from peers and pop culture, even what is taught at home can be over powered ......so I agree parenting is a fighting battle in this culture.
amen... but greater is the one living inside of us than he that is living in the world. The war is won but the battle rages on.
 

Quantrill

Well-known member
Sep 20, 2018
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#48
So, common among Christian's, rather than take an opportunity to learn so, in the future you may be a greater benefit to others, you'd rather ignore it all and instead argue with me.
See, though I may not have given Ata direct advice, i had hoped (as has happened in the past with others) that seeing someone who understands how they feel and defending them would be, in some small way, an encouragement.
So while I did not address them directly that does not mean I ignored them either.
And either way there was a lot of useful information provided to you, and anyone else who chooses to listen, that could be an aid for ministering to people in the future.
And nothing in my post revealed or suggested at my intelliengence on the subject. But as one that has nearly 30 years of depressive suffering under my belt I merely revealed what my trial has caused me to learn and the insights I've gained after spending 3/4 of my life with this burden. How sharing 30 years of experience and learning for the growth and betterment of others is perceived showing how "smart" I am I'm not entirely sure.
I'd hoped you'd walk away wiser on the topic and have an increased compassion for the people bearing this weight. Instead you felt a need to twist things so you could tear down what I was trying to teach and dismiss it.
You assume you have what I and others need to learn.

I see. So, Ata04114 should have been have so impressed with your understanding and identification with depression that there was encouragement there.

Your attention was not on the problem. It was on others who responded. It was really on you. You are the smart one. These things just fly off the top of your head. You have so much too offer. Yet you didn't address the person and their problem. But now you say, you didn't need to address the problem as your knowledge was so evident that it alone should be an encouragement.

Sorry pal, but everything in your post wreaked of your 'intelligence' on the subject. Do you think you're the only one who experiences depression.

If your intelligence is not the subject, why do you say I should walk away the wiser? I don't believe I have twisted anything. But you may be right that I do dismiss it.

Quantrill
 
Oct 7, 2018
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#49
You assume you have what I and others need to learn.

I see. So, Ata04114 should have been have so impressed with your understanding and identification with depression that there was encouragement there.

Your attention was not on the problem. It was on others who responded. It was really on you. You are the smart one. These things just fly off the top of your head. You have so much too offer. Yet you didn't address the person and their problem. But now you say, you didn't need to address the problem as your knowledge was so evident that it alone should be an encouragement.

Sorry pal, but everything in your post wreaked of your 'intelligence' on the subject. Do you think you're the only one who experiences depression.

If your intelligence is not the subject, why do you say I should walk away the wiser? I don't believe I have twisted anything. But you may be right that I do dismiss it.

Quantrill
Aren’t we all knowledgeable in what we know, and think others will perceive of us. No. I collect advice as it speaks to me, and discard the mannerism. Not everyone speaks the same. Not everyone hears the same. 🙏 Thank you ALL for taking time to ask questions into my situation, for your prayers and for your encouragement. God Bless us all.
 

Quantrill

Well-known member
Sep 20, 2018
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#50
Trust me when I tell you that the last twenty years have been service and sacrifice. One of my four kids gave me a card for Fathers Day.
And that is what parenting is. You are sacrificing for them. You don't need a card or gift to let you know you are approved of. You train em up the way you believe the Lord wants you to. They go out and operate in the world amidst the grid that you developed for them.

And they will do the same with theirs as your parents did for you. Parents don't need to be rewarded for being parents.

Quantrill
 
Nov 26, 2012
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#51
I don’t disagree, but I would say that after driving them around to endless activity and travel sports, spending roughly $35000 annually, on average a card is more of an acknowledgement (hence thankless), not a reward.
 
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UnderGrace

Guest
#52
I don’t disagree, but I would say that after driving them around to endless activity and travel sports, spending roughly $35000 annually, on average a card is more of an acknowledgement (hence thankless), not a reward.
That was your choice though. That is not the heart of parenting.
 
U

UnderGrace

Guest
#53
I did search for a passion, and I found Christ... I am a stay at home mother my youngest is finally in preschool a couple days a week. 1/2 days and I’m just trying really to find things that do bring me joy.... you’d think my family would, you’d think that God blessing me with 3 kids (my eldest being 14) would suffice for this season. It’s a long history, it’s a long road I’ve been down... I’ve been shut down as a person to make an entire family happy, and now I’m just trying to bring myself back to life, I believe when the say God gives you life, and I believe I face many more factors as a Child of God... I try to see the light in my struggle everyday, I try to do what’s best no matter what. 🙏
Well you do have a lot of diagnosis going on, I am glad you have received some counseling to give you insight because most often there are related issues under the surface especially when it comes to clinical depression and PTSD.

I really think working those inner hurts is where you will find healing, so I pray the Lord will bring someone in your life that will help you work through whatever needs to be dealt with.

'I think the bible tells us we need to remember we should not be driven by our emotions, you need to exercise your will and bring feelings under control, that would be one piece of advice I can pass on that someone told me long ago. :)
 
Oct 7, 2018
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#54
Well you do have a lot of diagnosis going on, I am glad you have received some counseling to give you insight because most often there are related issues under the surface especially when it comes to clinical depression and PTSD.

I really think working those inner hurts is where you will find healing, so I pray the Lord will bring someone in your life that will help you work through whatever needs to be dealt with.

'I think the bible tells us we need to remember we should not be driven by our emotions, you need to exercise your will and bring feelings under control, that would be one piece of advice I can pass on that someone told me long ago. :)
Thank you it’s because I am so emotional that my ptsd surfaces. And that even the smallest things that hurt me in the past still surfaces as a doubt or a trigger or a reason not to move forward. I’m very insightful as to my problems but those darn emotions... I need a momcation.... like Bell Locked in the beasts library, but obviously without the beast. Lol ❤️
 
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UnderGrace

Guest
#55
Thank you it’s because I am so emotional that my ptsd surfaces. And that even the smallest things that hurt me in the past still surfaces as a doubt or a trigger or a reason not to move forward. I’m very insightful as to my problems but those darn emotions... I need a momcation.... like Bell Locked in the beasts library, but obviously without the beast. Lol ❤️
I understand, but you do have a will and letting emotions rule your life is not good.

Really you need to find someone to talk to and deal with all that is affecting you emotionally and then put it to rest. Otherwise you may stay stuck in a rut and I think that you probably have a lot to contribute to the church and society as your children get older and you have more available time.
 
Oct 7, 2018
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#56
I understand, but you do have a will and letting emotions rule your life is not good.

Really you need to find someone to talk to and deal with all that is affecting you emotionally and then put it to rest. Otherwise you may stay stuck in a rut and I think that you probably have a lot to contribute to the church and society as your children get older and you have more available time.
Thank you I have sought therapy, I see a psychiatrist and no medicine helps. I seek Gods word, I’m learning better communication with my husband and to better accept being unequally yoked. I have ok days. My biggest goal is to take more control of my life independently from my family and to ask for help when I need it. Thank you 🙏
 

Dan_473

Senior Member
Mar 11, 2014
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#57
Hi again Ata041114!

Hear something I'm trying today,

I'm saying to myself or anyone else who will listen that many good things will probably happen today. Kind of like a mantra of sorts. Many good things will probably happen today!
 

Nehemiah6

Senior Member
Jul 18, 2017
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#58
My biggest goal is to take more control of my life independently from my family and to ask for help when I need it.
This could very well be the root cause of all your other distress symptoms. But there is nothing to stop you taking control of your life today.

1. If you are living with your family, find another apartment or house, and politely let them know that you wish to live independently and maintain good relations with all.

2. If proximity to your family is toxic, apply for a job in another city, another state, or even another country, and then move on.

3. Stop asking for help from your family altogether, and manage your own affairs.

4. Stop thinking of yourself as depressed, but you can certainly think of yourself as OPPRESSED. Christians are attacked and oppressed by the Devil and his minions daily, but that does not lead to depression.

5. Forget about psychiatrists and their nonsense since they will never address SPIRITUAL ISSUES. And what you are facing is spiritual warfare, for which God has provided you with spiritual armor. See Ephesians 6 and other related passages.
 

Subhumanoidal

Well-known member
Sep 17, 2018
4,055
3,166
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#59
You assume you have what I and others need to learn.

I see. So, Ata04114 should have been have so impressed with your understanding and identification with depression that there was encouragement there.

Your attention was not on the problem. It was on others who responded. It was really on you. You are the smart one. These things just fly off the top of your head. You have so much too offer. Yet you didn't address the person and their problem. But now you say, you didn't need to address the problem as your knowledge was so evident that it alone should be an encouragement.

Sorry pal, but everything in your post wreaked of your 'intelligence' on the subject. Do you think you're the only one who experiences depression.

If your intelligence is not the subject, why do you say I should walk away the wiser? I don't believe I have twisted anything. But you may be right that I do dismiss it.

Quantrill
And everything in your responses reek of a desperation to tear someone down and twist their good intentions to be evil. I know my intentions, you only presume to know. Sorry, though, i won't continue feeding your need to put people down. You'll need to go elsewhere for that. /kicks the dust off his shoes
 
M

Miri

Guest
#60
I am all of the above and whole heartedly believe that God answers prayers directly and indirectly.. I not only believe in my savior but believe in my discipleship for him. I listen to worship music daily, pray multiple times a day, read scripture... God answers my prayers but what my problem is the mud I’m stuck in, in moving forward with his answers. I see the solution many times but I feel trapped inside a glass box. Not all believers minds are alike. Which is why it’s so important to carry each other.

This might sound a little strange, but a while back a had a dream that I
was in a large garden with a large house. The front of the garden was all
mowed lawn, the back was overgrown like a wildlife garden.

In the dream I wondered to the back and it seemed to be a bit boggy in one
area. I was wearing boots and I took another step forward and my foot sank
into the mud so it covered the foot part of the boot.

I pulled out my foot and walked to the front of the garden away from
the overgrown part.

Then I saw a person walk out of the house and wonder towards the bog area.
I shouted to try to warn them it was muddy but they didn’t hear me. Then
suddenly they sank in the mud right up to their neck!

Then another person came out of the house and together we helped the sunken
person out of the bog. It was getting pretty desperate as at one point only
their hands were showing and they could only just managed to grab the
rope we throw them.

We pulled the person out and they were okay. But in the dream I wondered
why they had sank right in but I had only got my feet muddy!

Then in the dream the following verses came to me:

Psalm 40:1-3 NKJV
[1] I waited patiently for the LORD; And He inclined to me, And
heard my cry. [2] He also brought me up out of a horrible pit, Out
of the miry clay, And set my feet upon a rock, And established
my steps. [3] He has put a new song in my mouth- Praise to our God;
Many will see it and fear, And will trust in the LORD.


Then I woke up!

I realised I hadn’t sank right in because Jesus was my rock!

You mention mud and stuck, don’t let Satan rob you of who you are
in Christ. Yes we trample in mud but God doesn’t let us sink.

Wrote out a list of what you feel needs to change, pray about it
and ask God to show you and guide you to make the changes.
Don’t forget to ask God what He would like to change as well.
Try to do something proactive, don’t just settle back in the mud.
Keep moving forward little steps at a time.