Masturbation

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Feb 7, 2015
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And even beyond the physical stuff, pornography and the associated sex secrets has an almost unbelievable influence on how we view ourselves, AND our relationship with God. To me, it is almost beyond explaining, it is so detrimental.
 
Jun 5, 2014
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It sounds porn addiction turns our brains into swiss cheese! :eek:
Tiger Woods' brain must look like Swiss cheese. That must be why he now sucks at golf. Although he preferred porn with a heartbeat.

Did you read Kastleman's book you referred to? I'd be interested in some links to his scientific sources.

A question for you and anybody else:

Is Fifty Shades of Grey ​porn?
 
Feb 7, 2015
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Tiger Woods' brain must look like Swiss cheese. That must be why he now sucks at golf. Although he preferred porn with a heartbeat.

Did you read Kastleman's book you referred to? I'd be interested in some links to his scientific sources.

A question for you and anybody else:

Is Fifty Shades of Grey ​porn?
I have no idea. I've heard both good and bad about it. Personally, I don't really care.
 

Angela53510

Senior Member
Jan 24, 2011
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I'm 100% against porn. It is a scourge on our society. In seminary we had to study this, because it is so easy for pastors, who sit in their offices alone on a computer preparing their sermons to become addicted. I was shocked when I found out one of my classmates, who is now an assistant pastor in a church had been addicted to porn. He was very open, and he talked about the seminary working with him and giving him accountablity partners to help. He was also married with children, which goes to show you that marriage is not always the solution to a problem of addiction.

Anyway, what I am wondering is if anyone has links about porn addiction, especially about the neurotransmitters and how it withers the brain? I'd like to have it handy if I need to do counseling concerning this matter. That would be for women, of course. I think a man needs to be counseled by a man.
 
Feb 7, 2015
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I'm 100% against porn. It is a scourge on our society. In seminary we had to study this, because it is so easy for pastors, who sit in their offices alone on a computer preparing their sermons to become addicted. I was shocked when I found out one of my classmates, who is now an assistant pastor in a church had been addicted to porn. He was very open, and he talked about the seminary working with him and giving him accountablity partners to help. He was also married with children, which goes to show you that marriage is not always the solution to a problem of addiction.

Anyway, what I am wondering is if anyone has links about porn addiction, especially about the neurotransmitters and how it withers the brain? I'd like to have it handy if I need to do counseling concerning this matter. That would be for women, of course. I think a man needs to be counseled by a man.
There are literally hundreds on the web. The Conquer Series | The Battle Plan for Purity ($$$) that I mentioned earlier is probably one of the best for a group of men. (I've worked very little with women.)
 
May 3, 2013
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I have a friend that just found out her partner is masturbating and would rather do that than have sex with her.
I have heard that masturbating makes it harder for a male to be turned on during intercourse, I guess the same would go for a woman.
When it becomes a habit and doing it on a regular basis I would disagree with it.
Although everyone has needs and when you have gone without it for a long time I don't see it to be a problem without it becoming an obsession.
It could "ease" the appropriate process of "normal" ejaculation... There are retardant "tecniques" to prolong such a thing and, what I have seen on the female side, it makes it harder, for a man, to please a woman who is too used to "toys" but, the better source of info are women and I have studied lesbians (doing their things: Privately and on those videos).

My concern (the same for centuries) is: What´s Christianity giving or doing to solve the core problem of LONeLINESS and secured relationships, instead of blaming and pointing out sinners, who lacked such a blessing of being happily married (particularly , when the tendency is that MEN are bound to some sort of asexuality when certain "youth" hormones are reduced).
 
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Feb 7, 2015
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I have a friend that just found out her partner is masturbating and would rather do that than have sex with her.
I have heard that masturbating makes it harder for a male to be turned on during intercourse, I guess the same would go for a woman.
When it becomes a habit and doing it on a regular basis I would disagree with it.
Although everyone has needs and when you have gone without it for a long time I don't see it to be a problem without it becoming an obsession.
It's a bit deeper than that. much of sexual release and satisfaction is not just a response to getting Horney and then getting off (to keep it real for modern thinkers). Sexual tension fulfillments are avenues for gratification of all sorts of emotional frustrations that really have little, or nothing, to do with "sex", itself.
 
May 3, 2013
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Originally Posted by Ella85

I have a friend that just found out her partner is masturbating and would rather do that than have sex with her.
I have heard that masturbating makes it harder for a male to be turned on during intercourse, I guess the same would go for a woman.
When it becomes a habit and doing it on a regular basis I would disagree with it.
Although everyone has needs and when you have gone without it for a long time I don't see it to be a problem without it becoming an obsession."

Just see it as a drug or a recurrent habit (such as drinking, eating or lying): The more you like it, the more it is sought and, in the case of men (old men, like me) it has more limits, yet the mind is willing for more (not necessarily as lust, but as a need that longs to be pleased) What a LIE is completelly pleasing?

I know that there are marriages that, either of both, man or woman, felt frustrated or deprived, becasue they´re not really pleased, released or "fed"... Of course, there´s a spiritual problem on it! It is like eating luch, without a prayer or a thought of thanksgiving, and I got no satisfaction (Just ask some honest parents)
 
S

Sirk

Guest
It's a bit deeper than that. much of sexual release and satisfaction is not just a response to getting Horney and then getting off (to keep it real for modern thinkers). Sexual tension fulfillments are avenues for gratification of all sorts of emotional frustrations that really have little, or nothing, to do with "sex", itself.
It's a mechanism for coping with built up unprocessed painful emotions. The key to overcoming sex and other addictions is to learn new healthy mechanisms while processing old wounds and learning to process new ones in the moment.
 
Feb 7, 2015
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It's a mechanism for coping with built up unprocessed painful emotions. The key to overcoming sex and other addictions is to learn new healthy mechanisms while processing old wounds and learning to process new ones in the moment.
Very insightful!
 
J

JesusistheChrist

Guest
I would say say that if Jesus was so literally and seriously talking about masturbation, then we should literally and seriously continue following His instruction and start cutting off eyes and hands.

Anyone believe THAT strongly in what He's saying?
Anyone?
Anyone?
Bueller?
As a matter of fact, I do believe that strongly. Jesus didn't just say things to be "filler" in our Bibles.
 
Feb 24, 2015
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This is actually a very important subject because it bring to focus the reality we are sexual beings with sexual attraction.
For me the problem is to separate the sexual desire you have for someone which is a biological mechanism and real relationships and the meaning of intimacy. Masturbation is often about sexual release, and too often we can deny our sexual reality, believing we are above these mechanisms in our lives. Too many people I have met were they are confused between what is their personal expression of love and affection and need and sexuality. Much sin and confusion comes from inappropriate mixing of the two when people have no loving intention but only focus on lust and exploitation.
Masturbation causes problems because it takes away the interaction with others, but many have to deal with changed relationships within marriages and compromise. Whether people are honest or not, but it is going on everywhere, it literally is part of life and coping. To put things truly in context the problem with adultery, is we come from a sexual relationship, and the covenant relationships that underpin it or not. Many people exist because of a lack of sexual understanding and control, and overthrows families and stable relationships with great pain and anguish. So masturbation is often a simple compromise that works. Now if you deal with the whole issue of sexual identity, need, and love you can begin to approach the difficult issue in life.
 

JesusLives

Senior Member
Oct 11, 2013
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At the risk of embarrassing myself. I have to admit as a woman I have had some questions about this kind of thing, but I never felt comfortable about asking the Pastor of my church as it is embarrassing and I didn't want him to think less of me. Then when you have questions about toys or adult issues who is one suppose to ask? I wouldn't ask my friends but I have had questions and still have some questions.

I will admit that in between divorce and my return to the church I did use a toy as I felt it was better than committing fornication or adultery even though I was divorced at the time. At least you aren't causing someone else to sin with you... So who do you ask these kinds of questions I'd really like to know?
 

JesusLives

Senior Member
Oct 11, 2013
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What if it's for a fertility test?
Some people laugh because they are uncomfortable with the topic....This was just flat out funny.....

Blond answer for this would be all systems go....
 
S

Sirk

Guest
Some people laugh because they are uncomfortable with the topic....This was just flat out funny.....

Blond answer for this would be all systems go....
I aim to please! As long as it's done without an aid, I think you're good. Lol. Okay maybe you can slide with an old Sears catalogue. Lol
 
Feb 7, 2015
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Fortunately, we (at least in my area) live in a time and location where there are a lot of informed (male & female) professionals who can answer a many of the questions that arise for us.
 
S

Sirk

Guest
Some people laugh because they are uncomfortable with the topic....This was just flat out funny.....

Blond answer for this would be all systems go....
I don't think its an uncomfortable topic at all. Talking about things in an open an honest way is like shining the light of truth on them. The devil hates the light and prefers the shadows of shame.
 
Feb 7, 2015
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Most families are only as sick as their secrets.
 

slave

Senior Member
Mar 20, 2015
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God spoke about control...But never did it in a spirit of finger- pointing. I say that not to do my own version of that either, but to see Jesus' approach to things. God says in Philippians 4:6-7; Not to be anxious about anything. The first approach to setting people straight concerns me.For God tells me to test the spirits.

God never wrote about Masterbation. And I am not sure where the literature is on the "nerve damage tests".

Yet let me talk about what God said...He talks about controlling the mind. when that act occurs we drift into fantasy. And that fantasy God say's is to Him like you have done it in the flesh. Husbands and wives should definitely hear those words, in view of your oaths before God in relationship to your spouse.

Yet even in singles God wants to give us the best way. And although we are freed by Christ from the rule of the law...not all things we are free to do are beneficial for us.

I am not the judge. I Have a few questions about things too when I get up there. Sexual desire is a powerfully fragile thing.

YetI know the nature of Christ. And I love Him so much I want to offer Him my whole heart in everything.Even in this. God says faith without works is dead....If you love me you will obey me. I believe God has freed sex for us to have in His timing. But it becomes the flesh vs. Him in the matters of the Heart.

I will never give up my relationship with God for that flesh.
 
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